Tasty Tuesday

Tuesday, September 30, 2008
One of my absolute favorite things to make for pot-luck is home-made Macaroni and Cheese. Because, really, what's better and more popular than good Macaroni and Cheese?

Here's my easier-than-falling-off-a-log Mac-n-Cheese recipe. I usually use lots of coarse ground black pepper, and I tend to go easy on the cheddar cheese - it's pretty oily. I've found a combination of colby, jack and cheddar gives the best texture and flavor. If I'm cooking just for us, I use this recipe; for pot-luck, I double it.

All-Day Macaroni and Cheese

8 oz elbow macaroni, cooked and drained
1 can (12 oz) evaporated milk
1 1/2 cups milk
2 eggs
4 cups (16 oz) shredded cheeses, divided
Salt to taste
Coarse ground black pepper to taste

Place the cooked macaroni in a 3 1/2 quart (or larger) slow cooker that has been coated with nonstick vegetable spray. Add the remaining ingredients except 1 cup of the cheese; mix well. Sprinkle with the remaining 1 cup cheese, then cover and cook on the low setting for 5 to 6 hours, or until the mixture is firm and golden around the edges. do not remove the cover or stir until the macaroni has finished cooking.

I usually end up stirring it - my crock pot is hot on one side, and it gets too crusty along the side if I don't.

Hmm...mac-n-cheese!

September 'Tard of the Month

September's coming to a close, and it's time to vote on the September 'Tard of the Month. Here are today's incredibly dumbass candidates.

- Walter Wagner, who thinks the LHC will destroy life-as-we-it.
- BC Tours, your "Biblically Correct" alternative to reality.
- The Anonymous Pedicure Customer, who believes fascism is a much better alternative than our two-party system.
- The McCain Campaign, who are apparently incapable of telling time.

Get your votes in, people - these things don't settle themselves.

Attention Colorado Democratic Party

Monday, September 29, 2008
Listen up, you fuckwits. I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE YOU ANY OF MY MONEY. You're not going to wear me down by continuing to call me, especially when I've repeatedly asked you to stop.

You're really not. I'm not a fatigued parent who will give in to end the whining when my kid wants candy. You're just pissing me off more with each call.

The next time you call me, I'm breaking out some of the more colorful language I learned in the Navy, and I'm going to let you have it. Then I'm going to call your headquarters and let them have it. Then I'm going to go back to registering as an Independent. Because the "Independents" don't think they're entitled to anything from me.

You've been warned.

'Tard of the Week - McCain Campaign

This week's 'tard is none other than the McCain campaign, because they apparently lack the ability to tell time.

On Friday, September 26th, the McCain campaign released the ad you see in this screen shot, taken on Friday at 10:16 a.m. Now I'm not saying having your materials prepared ahead of time is a Bad Thing - fortune favors the prepared. But typically, the competent media department holds those materials until after the event to avoid an embarrassing "Dewey Defeats Truman" moment.

Of course, there's always the possibility that the McCain campaign really has a time machine, and could thus determine ahead of time who won the debate. But then their posting of this ad caused a paradox shift, and ended up making their candidate look like a complete tool.

Boy, won't I be embarrassed if that turns out to be true. Egg on my face and all that.

'Tards.

Presidential Foreign Policy Debate

We had other fish to fry on Friday evening, so we TiVoed the Presidential Debate, and watched it last night.

Mostly, I'd just like everyone involved to just sit down and shut up, or alternatively, to stop listening to popular media until November 15th. These people make my feet swell. But that's really not an option. I feel pretty strongly about the need to make an informed choice, and that means I need to watch the debates with a critical eye.

Here are my initial thoughts:

- The transparency of the strategies being employed by both candidates are extreme and laughable. If I have to listen to John McCain make one more comment about he's done this work for "many, many years" I will run screaming into night.* If I have to listen to Barack Obama make one more comparison between John McCain and George W. Bush, I will puncture my eardrum with an icepick. We get it. Okay? We fucking get it. Barack's inexperienced, John's a Bush clone. Move on, already, and give me some new information about your own qualifications, ideas and policies. Feet swelling: Stage 1. I better elevate.

- Both candidates are continuing the time-honored tradition of politicians who can't give a straight answer to save their life (or more to the point, the economy). How many times did Jim Lehrer have to ask which of their pet projects will have to be tabled so that the government can afford to bail out our financial system? Three? Four? McCain finally gave a straight (but draconian) answer, and as near as I can tell, Obama never answered at all. Politician = Weasel. Feet swelling: Stage 2. I need ibuprofen.

- Is there some reason the candidates can't debate their differences with one another and not address their comments to the moderator? Jim Lehrer asked them several times to address their remarks to each other, and neither candidate was willing to do so. Too confrontational? Too personal? Nowhere to hide? I guess calling your opponent a douchebag is only acceptable if you don't have to look them in the eye when you do so. Perhaps they should just blog their Presidential Debates, so they can take full advantage of the anonymity = dickhead phenomenon. Feet swelling: Stage 3. Great. Now my pedicure is ruined.

Once the debate was over, my immediate response was, "Great. There's 2 hours of my life I'll never get back." I didn't learn anything new, other than both John McCain and Barack Obama are more professional debaters than the Great Deciderer. I really wish the candidates would use these events as an opportunity to discuss the meat of the matter - their own ideas, plans, and policies. I don't care how eloquently you can trash your opponent. Use this time to prove to me that you belong in the big chair. Not why your opponent doesn't.

And I haven't even begun to research local races and ballot initiatives. The voter's handbook arrived on Saturday, and it's a thick one. I'm quite sure that by the time I'm ready to mail in my ballot, I'll need a hyperbaric chamber.


*And why does John McCain think that all his international "fact-finding" missions make him such a great deal for the American public? When politicians find their way into a war zone, they usually don't find many facts. They mostly find photo ops, and the troops who are there trying to do their real jobs find extra duty so they can protect the asshat politician.

Banned Books Week - An Update

Sunday, September 28, 2008
Courtesy of Random Michelle, here are the top 100 challenged books 2000 to 2007.

Books I’ve read or are currently checked out from the library are in bold.

Top 100 Banned/Challenged Books in 2000-2007:

1 Harry Potter J.K. Rowling
2 Alice series Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
3 The Chocolate War Robert Cormier
4 Of Mice and Men John Steinbeck
5 I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings Maya Angelou
6 Scary Stories Alvin Schwartz
7 Fallen Angels Walter Dean Myers
8 It’s Perfectly Normal Robie Harris
9 And Tango Makes Three Justin Richardson/Peter Parnell
10 Captain Underpants Dav Pilkey
11 The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn Mark Twain
12 The Bluest Eye Toni Morrison
13 Forever Judy Blume
14 The Color Purple Alice Walker
15 The Perks of Being A Wallflower Stephen Chbosky
16 Killing Mr. Griffin Lois Duncan
17 Go Ask Alice Anonymous
18 King and King Linda de Haan
19 Catcher in the Rye J.D. Salinger
20 Bridge to Terabithia Katherine Paterson
21 The Giver Lois Lowry
22 We All Fall Down Robert Cormier
23 To Kill A Mockingbird Harper Lee`
24 Beloved Toni Morrison
25 The Face on the Milk Carton Caroline Cooney
26 Snow Falling on Cedars David Guterson
27 My Brother Sam Is Dead James Lincoln Collier
28 In the Night Kitchen Maurice Sendak
29 His Dark Materials series Philip Pullman
30 Gossip Girl series Cecily von Ziegesar
31 What My Mother Doesn’t Know Sonya Sones
32 Angus, Thongs, and Full Frontal Snogging Louise Rennison
33 It’s So Amazing Robie Harris
34 Arming America Michael Bellasiles
35 Kaffir Boy Mark Mathabane
36 Blubber Judy Blume
37 Brave New World Aldous Huxley
38 Athletic Shorts Chris Crutcher
39 Bless Me, Ultima Rudolfo Anaya
40 Life is Funny E.R. Frank
41 Daughters of Eve Lois Duncan
42 Crazy Lady Jane Leslie Conly
43 The Great Gilly Hopkins Katherine Paterson
44 You Hear Me Betsy Franco
45 Slaughterhouse Five Kurt Vonnegut
46 Whale Talk Chris Crutcher
47 The Adventures of Super Diaper Baby Dav Pilkey
48 The Facts Speak for Themselves Brock Cole
49 The Terrorist Caroline Cooney
50 Mick Harte Was Here Barbara Park
51 Summer of My German Soldier Bette Green
52 The Upstairs Room Johanna Reiss
53 When Dad Killed Mom Julius Lester
54 Blood and Chocolate Annette Curtis Klause
55 The Fighting Ground Avi
56 The Things They Carried Tim O’Brien
57 Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry Mildred Taylor
58 Fat Kid Rules the World K.L. Going
59 The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big, Round Things Carolyn Mackler
60 A Time To Kill John Grisham
61 Rainbow Boys Alex Sanchez
62 Olive’s Ocean Kevin Henkes
63 One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest Ken Kesey
64 A Day No Pigs Would Die Robert Newton Peck
65 Speak Laurie Halse Anderson
66 Always Running Luis Rodriguez
67 Black Boy Richard Wright
68 Julie of the Wolves Jean Craighead George
69 Deal With It! Esther Drill
70 Detour for Emmy Marilyn Reynolds
71 Draw Me A Star Eric Carle
72 Fahrenheit 451 Ray Bradbury
73 Harris and Me Gary Paulsen
74 Junie B. Jones series Barbara Park
75 So Far From the Bamboo Grove Yoko Watkins
76 Song of Solomon Toni Morrison
77 Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes Chris Crutcher
78 What’s Happening to My Body Book Lynda Madaras
79 The Boy Who Lost His Face Louis Sachar
80 The Lovely Bones Alice Sebold
81 Anastasia Again! Lois Lowry
82 Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret Judy Blume
83 Bumps In the Night Harry Allard
84 Goosebumps series R.L. Stine
85 Shade’s Children Garth Nix
86 Cut Patricia McCormick
87 Grendel John Gardner
88 The House of Spirits Isabel Allende
89 I Saw Esau Iona Opte
90 Ironman Chris Crutcher
91 The Stupids series Harry Allard
92 Taming the Star Runner S.E. Hinton
93 Then Again, Maybe I Won’t Judy Blume
94 Tiger Eyes Judy Blume
95 Like Water for Chocolate Laura Esquivel
96 Nathan’s Run John Gilstrap
97 Pinkerton, Behave! Steven Kellog
98 Freaky Friday Mary Rodgers
99 Halloween ABC Eve Merriam
100 Heather Has Two Mommies Leslea Newman

26%. Pretty pathetic.

There's about ten more that my kids have read for school, which I think is pretty darn cool, actually.

A Good Man

Saturday, September 27, 2008
I was sorry to learn this morning that Paul Newman has passed away.

While I think he was a superlative actor, I think his greatest contribution was that of philanthropist. A lot of people had better lives as a direct result of his work, and that's something worth being remembered for.

Joanne, you have my sympathy. He was a good man.

I Read Banned Books

Friday, September 26, 2008
I read banned books. Yes, I do. I'm a rebel that way. Fear me, book-burners and censors, for I am a militant free speech advocate, and I'm not afraid to flay you with my bookmark.

My Hot Sister and I were raised in an environment where no books were off-limits. None. If it was in my parents' bookshelves or at the library, I was allowed to read it. Such freedom enlarged my world, although I didn't realize the value of the gift until I became an adult.

And so I support the American Library Association's "Banned Books Week: Celebrating the Freedom to Read," September 27 - October 4th, 2008.

From the ALA's website, here are the most challenged books of 2007:

1) “And Tango Makes Three,” by Justin Richardson/Peter Parnell Reasons: Anti-Ethnic, Sexism, Homosexuality, Anti-Family, Religious Viewpoint, Unsuited to Age Group

2) The Chocolate War,” by Robert Cormier Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Violence

3) “Olive’s Ocean,” by Kevin Henkes Reasons: Sexually Explicit and Offensive Language

4) “The Golden Compass,” by Philip Pullman Reasons: Religious Viewpoint

5) “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn,” by Mark Twain Reasons: Racism

6) “The Color Purple,” by Alice Walker Reasons: Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language

7) "TTYL,” by Lauren Myracle Reasons: Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

8) "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings,” by Maya Angelou Reasons: Sexually Explicit

9) “It’s Perfectly Normal,” by Robie Harris Reasons: Sex Education, Sexually Explicit

10) "The Perks of Being A Wallflower,” by Stephen Chbosky Reasons: Homosexuality, Sexually Explicit, Offensive Language, Unsuited to Age Group

So I'm going to make sure I check out the above books from my local library, even the children's books and the ones I've already read, to ensure they are considered "in demand." Since the head librarian here in Douglas County ROCKS, I don't know if he needs my help on this or not, but it sure won't hurt.

Support banned books!

Boogie Blogging Friday

Boogie's in fine fettle this morning. He had his favorite breakfast - baby carrots in au jus left over from last night's roast beast poured over kibble.

NomNomNomNom!

Now he's itching to go for his morning walkies, in spite of the fact that it's still pretty dark out. Poor thing will just have to wait until it warms up a bit, in spite of his whining.

For a 95lb ferocious doggie, he sure cries a lot.

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 36


Convicted killer Scott Peterson is looking for a girlfriend from his jail cell! With an intent to marry her! Who will he choose? Will he find a way to drown her during the conjugal visit? Who Cares!

My New Girl Crush

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Whack-Job de Jour

On Monday, six girls were taken into state custody from the compound of evangelist Tony Alamo in southwest Arkansas amid allegations that the religious leader was marrying young girls to older men.

While he denies the abuse, he does believe that young girls should marry as soon as possible because it's mandated by the Bible. His view on sex for girls? "Consent is puberty."

The U.S. Attorney's Office believes the compound was producing child pornography. Alamo denies this allegation, stating that it's government officials who are engaging in impure activities after taking the young girls into protective custody.

Stories like these make me feel like I've been transported to the past, where wimmin-folk were to be seen and not heard, and edjoo-ca-shun was only for them uppity folks.

I simply don't understand. In this country, in the 21st century, how can it be okay that families relegate their daughters to such a life, with no education, no idea of the wider world, no idea of what they're capable of? I don't believe living such a life as an informed choice is a bad thing. I do think that forcing young teens into it without an understanding of their potential is a very bad thing.

But I guess that depends on your perspective. If your power base depends on keeping half your followers under strict control, and the other half can be bribed with the promise of a young girl, it's certainly not to your advantage to give those young girls any kind of exposure to the wider world. We can't have them thinking they can do or be anything other than a teen bride, now can we?

Granted, Mr. Alamo appears to be a real nutter, complete with ideas about the great Washington, DC/Vatican conspiracy and Armageddon, not to mention carrying his dead wife's body around with him for years on end, waiting for her to be resurrected. As long as he's not hurting anyone, I really don't care if he paints his ass blue and barks at the moon. But the young girls who have their choices and futures compromised by him and his belief system deserve better.


H/T to SkepChick

Hot Chick - The Newest Marvel Superhero

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Marvel Create Your Own Superhero


Flip o' the Cape to Carol Elaine, the Ordinary Goddess

Words to Live By

Hope is not about a favorable outcome.

2008 Flower Pr0n

I've got nothing today, y'all. I'm trying to catch up from my days off, and my creative juices are flowing like molasses.

So here's a photo of my Japanese Honeysuckle, which decided to bloom this year - only the second time since we bought the house.

The news is all bad, anyway, what with the kabillionaires running their companies into the ground and then holding their hand out to Uncle Henry. A cynic would comment about how those responsible will not end up working until they die and lose everything they own - that fate is reserved for the rank and file. Because only the proles should be held accountable, after all.

I'm depressing myself. I think I'll stand outside and smell the Honeysuckle.

'Tard of the Week - Anonymous Pedicure Customer

Tuesday, September 23, 2008
"Well. Isn't that the most ignorant thing I've heard today."

I made this comment in my previous blog entry.

Stupid, stupid blogger. Really stupid. I should know not to tempt the fates in such a manner.

I went to get my pedicure today in a salon located in a small strip mall near our home (ah, pedicure, how I love thee!). The space next to the salon has recently been rented out by the Obama campaign, and they have all their signage up.

Well, I'm sitting there getting my toes done and reading Whale Season when this week's 'Tard, a woman in the chair next to me, calls someone on her cell phone. She tells the person on the other end how the Obama campaign has set up "right here in Parker!" and how they should "do something!" because "Democrats should not be allowed to vote!"

At first I thought she was being facetious, in the way that I make jokes about people being too stupid and ignorant to vote. Alas, poor Yorick, that was not the case. As the conversation progressed, she made it very clear that yes, she honestly thought Democrats should not be allowed to vote in Douglas County. Evidently the vocal minority in our fair county make her twitchy, and she believes we should all just shut up because we're ruining the quality of life for the real Americans.

I guess we subversive Democrats accomplish this ruin with all our terrorist-sponsoring activities such as funding the food bank, and supporting the ACLU, and providing assistance to help poor families keep the lights on. I can see why we should crawl under a rock and die - we really suck.

She hung up and went away before I could either A) ask her if real Americans are those who burn crosses on lawns on Saturday and worship before them on Sundays, or B) hit her in the face with a shovel.

It's probably best. I wouldn't want to burn my last vacation day of the fiscal year waiting for my Smart Man to come bail me out.

Fucking 'tard.

What the Hell Were You Thinking? - Federal Board of Immigration Appeals

It seems that the U.S. Attorney General has spanked the Federal Immigration Court for a recent decision they made to deport a Mali woman who was the victim of genital mutilation.

The woman in question was seeking asylum because if she was returned to her tribe, she would be forced into an arranged marriage, and was concerned that any female children she had would also be forced to undergo "female circumcision" or genital mutilation.

The court decided to deport her because she had already been the victim of genital mutilation, so why not send her back? The damage was done, it's no concern of ours, (fingers in ears) lalalala! I can't hear you!

Well. Isn't that the most ignorant thing I've heard today.

Really, Board of Immigration Appeals? Really? Since the threat of genital mutilation is reasonable grounds for asylum, you would think these fuckwits would have made at least some small effort to discover the actual process by which women are mutilated. This investigation would have led to the amazing discovery that genital mutilation is not a one-time event for women in these communities. It's done again and again, usually to "fix" what "breaks" after sex and childbirth.

Thankfully, AG Mukasey stepped in and will force the Appeals Board to reconsider the decision. Hopefully, the bad publicity will force a new decision, and this woman (and her offspring) will be able to lead mutilation-free lives.

What the Hell were you thinking, Board of Immigration Appeals?


H/T to Random Michelle and her hypertension inducing sibling.

Conversations with Karma - Dr. Matthias Rath

Monday, September 22, 2008
*ring, ring*

Dr. Matthias Rath: Hello! Have you taken your cellular medicine today?

Karma: Hello! May I speak to Dr. Matthias Rath, please? This is Karma calling.

MR: This is Dr. Rath. Have you taken your cellular medicine today?

K: Um, no. I can't really get sick, so I don't see the point of medication.

MR: Everyone can get sick. If they would just partake of my cellular medicine, all would be well!

K: Oh! You mean your magic vitamins. No, I don't take vitamins. As I said, I'm really more of an idea. Or a concept. But I am calling about your claims.

MR: What do you mean, magic vitamins? I create and manufacture cellular medicine. You better watch it, or I'll sue you for libel. I have lots of practice, you know.

K: That's part of why I'm calling, actually. You know how you sued Dr. Ben Goldacre and The Guardian for their denunciation of your claims?

MR: Yes. Yes, I do. They were defaming me. After all I've done for the afflicted of sub-Saharan Africa! They totally deserve everything they've got coming to them!

K: Yes. About that. What they've got coming to them is about a quarter of a million pounds for their legal fees. Out of your pocket.

::cue crickets::

K: You still there, Doc?

MR: Yes. But I don't understand.

K: I'm sure you don't. So I'll explain it to you. When you dropped your case against Dr. Goldacre and the Guardian, the court awarded them the payment of their legal fees. By you.

MR: But I dropped it. That's not fair.

K: Yeah. But see, I'm Karma. Not Fairma. Are you ready for the Karmic justice part?

MR: There's no justice here! My fabulous cellular medication cures AIDS! And diabetes! And cancer! And cardiovascular disease! They're just jealous!

K: Um, not so much, Doc. In fact, your human trials actually killed people, and most reputable organizations have denounced your claims as fraudulent and immoral. When people follow your protocol instead of using their anti-viral medications, they die. Of AIDS. That's pretty fucked up, dude.

MR: You can't prove that. I think they just didn't follow my instructions or something. Yeah. That must be it.

K: Whatever. You know, I've seen lots, and lots of bad shit. Pretty much every piece of bad shit ever. And you kind of disgust me. In fact, I think I may have to rethink my justice here. A half a million pounds really doesn't compare to the damage you've caused. How about I call you back?

MR: I'm not sure I want that. Maybe I'll change my number.

K: Be my guest. I have everyone's number.

*click*

Vacation

Ah, vacation, how I love thee.

I don't have to deal with sales people. I can do what I wish. I don't have to deal with sales people. I can sleep in. I don't have to deal with sales people. I can go shopping. I don't have to deal with sales people. I can ignore my phone.

And have I mentioned that I don't have to deal with sales people? That's the real benefit of vacation days in my job. Of any job that has sales people as the "customer."

I'm using my last two vacation days of the fiscal year today and tomorrow, and essentially being a lazy-ass. My big plans? Getting a pedicure. Going to Costco. Practicing my bass. Doing a bit of homework. Basically just fucking around.

After October 1st, my vacation counter will roll over again, and I won't have as many unaccounted for days. The Smart Man and I have some plans for next year, so I'll need to save them for specific activities.

Hmm...vacation!

Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume V Update

Remember young Nujood Ali, the 10 year old Yemeni girl who sued to divorce a much older man and won? She was featured in Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume V.

Well, after being granted her divorce, she was back in school last week, studying "Arabic, the Koran, mathematics and drawing."

Her ambition? "To be able to attend university and become a lawyer like Shada Nasser, the well-known Yemeni human rights advocate who helped her get her divorce."

Go, Nujood, go. All the way to the finish line and beyond.

iTunes Wordle

Sunday, September 21, 2008
Via Tania, here is my iTunes Wordle:

To make your own iTunes picture:

1) In iTunes, select View Options under the View menu.
2) Turn off everything but “Artist.”
3) Select all and copy into a spreadsheet.
4) Delete the column with the music title.
5) Paste the results into the Wordle.net Create page.

Ah, Learning...

Saturday, September 20, 2008
After my incredibly crappy experience during my last college class, I was really looking forward to this semester. I'm taking "Nations, Cultures and Peoples," and it's being taught by the same professor who taught my most excellent "Law, Policy and Politics" class earlier this year.

I'm happy to report that I'm not disappointed. The work is challenging, the boards are active and the posts intelligent, the professor is engaged and demanding. Yay, higher education!

One thing I have noticed about my coursework at DU - if the course has required reading that centers around a specific textbook, the class has usually been mediocre to poor. If the required reading is a collection of essays, published articles and other eclectic material, the course has usually been good to outstanding. "Nations" is my ninth class in this program, and while nine is certainly not a statistical universe, I do see a trend.

Consider some of the reading sources from the last two weeks:

- Selected readings from the Global Policy Forum

- Selected readings from The Post-American World, by Fareed Zakaria

- Selected readings from Distant Mirrors: America as a Foreign Culture

- Selected readings from The World is Flat by Thomas Friedman

Students are encouraged to discuss their own life experiences with globalization and living outside the U.S., and I'm pleased that I'm not the only one who has direct experience. If you think the conclusion of a specific reading is a big steaming pile of monkey poo, you're encouraged to say so, as long as you can back up your opinion. This is the reason I spend time going to classes when I don't really need to do so.

I really hope that my poor experience last semester was an aberration, and this is the norm.

Loot! Loot! Loot NOT for Me!

After the "Great 2008 Apple Butter Diaspora," Nathan's Anonymous Girlfriend wanted to do something nice in return, and she's a pretty accomplished knitter.

Since I really didn't need any cold weather gear, we agreed that she would do some knitting for charity and then donate the pieces in my name.

Here's the cool output - fabulous baby hats, destined for a Denver charity! Much cooler than the hats I knit, since I'm a quantity kind of gal.

W00t! Thanks, Anonymous Girlfriend!

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 35

Friday, September 19, 2008

Pamela Anderson admits to cleaning addiction! She simply can't let go of the Mr. Clean! Will her compulsion lead to...zzzz...chapped hands...zzzzz

Who Cares!

Boogie Blogging Friday


Boogie's a happy, happy dog.

After weeks in his cast, then a stomach bug that had him vomiting all over the carpet (when Michelle and Michael were here, no less. Welcome to my home! Watch your step!), he's finally back on track and going out for his daily walks. Here he is observing some fascinating event near the walking path behind our housing development.

One of the reasons Boogie's presence in my life makes me happy is because of his joyfulness. This is a dog that enjoys his daily activities.

Loot! Loot! LOOT for ME!


What should arrive in yesterday's mail but Loot for Me! Jeri sent me this T-Shirt, because it reminded her of me. I laughed out loud when I saw it. Hee!

Thanks, Jeri! You rule!

Arrrgh! I'm a Pirate

Avast, maties, 'tis International Talk Like a Pirate Day! Arrgh!

So break out the grog, ye scurvy dogs, and prepare to pillage these land-lubber villages! Arrgh!



My pirate name is:


Captain Jenny Cash



Even though there's no legal rank on a pirate ship, everyone recognizes you're the one in charge. You're musical, and you've got a certain style if not flair. You'll do just fine. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

Oprah Gets it Right

Thursday, September 18, 2008
Over the years, I've vacillated between really admiring Oprah Winfrey and rolling my eyes.

Admiring her because she's a pretty involved philanthropist who's done a lot for kids and education, and rolling my eyes because she's really impressed with her own wealth, and she's also into the woo (The Secret, anyone? ::snort::).

But this time, she really got it right.

On Monday, she aired a show on Internet child predators, and the statistics were staggering. Taking information from the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, the FBI and other law enforcement agencies, she notes that even though modern technology allows law enforcement to track and identify hundreds of leads a day on child predators, only 2% are ever investigated, due to a lack of manpower (read that: money). Please note that some of these shitbirds molest and abuse babies and toddlers, and provide instructions on how to molest your very own child, complete with pictures, from her birth all the way to adulthood.

I dearly wish I was making that up. You have no idea how much I wish that. But there are forty analysts working at the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children who see video of this every day. The analysts require the services of a full-time psychologist (no surprise), and according to the experts, the video or still documentation helps "normalize" the molesting behavior for the perpetrators.

We'll pause now so you can go vomit.

Allow me to be clear. Nothing - nothing - makes my blood boil like those who prey on children. Seriously. In spite of my grave misgivings about capital punishment, I'll make an exception for these motherfuckers. There's something fundamentally wrong with those who see children as sexual objects. They're broken. There's nothing normal about this, on any level.

In an effort to address this issue, there is a bill currently in the Senate called PROTECT our Children Act, Senate bill 1738. The bill authorizes over $320 million over the next five years in desperately needed funding for law enforcement to investigate child exploitation, mandates that child rescue be a top priority for law enforcement receiving federal funding, and allocates funds for high-tech computer software that can track down Internet predators.

This bill won't fix all that's wrong with how our society addresses these issues, but it's a start. I'll be writing to both my Senators on this matter.

On this issue, I'm proud to stand with Oprah. Let's lock these pusbags up, and do more to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

Other People's Children

For the most part, I like my own children. For the most part, I like their friends. For the most part, I like my relatives who are currently children.

Other people's children? Meh.

I'm not a cane-waving "get off my lawn" kind of gal. I enjoy our neighbor kids and kept our basketball hoop so they could play. I like Hallowe'en and make sure we have high quality candy available for trick-or-treaters. When kids come to my door selling whatever it is they sell, I always buy. I always vote for bond issues supporting education and kids activities.

But kids, in a general sense, just aren't interesting to me unless I have some emotional investment.

I'm sure part of that feeling comes from parents who allow their children to behave badly, both in public and in private. Screaming kids who interrupt other people's meals in restaurants, kids who run through public places such as grocery stores like they're in a playground, kids with bad manners.

I'm not saying children should be "seen and not heard," but I don't think expecting children to show a minimum level of courtesy and appropriate behavior in public is unreasonable.

Of course, I do love babies. As long as I can give them back.

Michael Savage, Asshole

Wednesday, September 17, 2008
A direct quote from Michael Savage, Asshole: "Liberalism is in essence the HIV virus, and it weakens the defense cells of a nation. What are the defense cells of a nation? Well, the church, they've attacked particularly the Catholic Church for 30 straight years. The police, attacked for the last 50 straight years by the ACLU viruses. And the military, attacked for the last 50 years by the Barbara Boxer viruses on our planet."

Really, Michael Savage? Really? Could you be a bigger fucking hypocrite? I'm a liberal. By your own standards I'm "mentally ill" because I believe the first Amendment should be applied to all religious institutions, including the Christian majority; I believe the police should be accountable for their professional actions, good and bad; I believe the Armed Forces should only be used as a last resort when diplomacy fails, and should also be the best trained, best equipped, best paid Armed Forces in the world.

My credibility for these positions? I'm the daughter of a law enforcement professional. I'm a civic volunteer. I'm a 17 year veteran of the Armed Forces. I'm a contributing member of society. I'm a blogger who, when I talk out of my ass, admits that's the case.

Based on your bio, you're not any of these things. You're a shock-jock with no understanding of service. You're a guy who wasted his education by writing a book on the wonders of Homeopathy. Seriously? Homeopathy? This is your stunning contribution to human knowledge? How very fitting.

::snort::

For My Hot Mom

'Tard of the Week - BC Tours

Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Since the UCF had such a fabulous time at the Denver Museum of History and Science yesterday, this week's 'tard is none other than "BC Tours."

In this case, "BC" stands for "Biblically Correct." As in, going places and interpreting the subject matter of the place in "Biblically Correct" terms. From their website:

"The mission of B.C. Tours is
: Communicating Biblical Truth in every area of life through tours of museums, zoos, and historical sites."


That's right, you heathens out there. "Truth" with a capital "T." As in, Truth that doesn't require the scientific method, physical evidence or logic, because Jebus told me it was True.

These bozos have been hanging around the DMNS for a number of years, as well as the National Center for Atmospheric Research in Boulder. the Denver Zoo, the Garden of the Gods, Dinosaur Ridge and other Colorado landmarks. Their plan is to take children, with the blessing of their equally scientifically illiterate parents, and put all of this "so-called science" into a Biblical context. They promise that by the end of the tour, "you will learn how to prove Creation with the fossil record and dismiss foolish arguments based on pseudo science--not reality."

Just pasting that into my Blog makes me throw up in my mouth a little.

So basically, here's a group of non-scientists, who openly admit that they consider the Bible the literal word of God (insert picture of intellectually dishonest tour guide with his fingers in ears, lalalala). They go around to public institutions with their children in order to indoctrinate them into believing that the scientific method is a less reliable arbiter of truth than the translator who worked on their Holy Book.

They do this indoctrination in what is basically the spiritual home of the scientists whose ideas they detest, essentially spitting on their life's work. You can imagine how pleased the DMNS staff is about this. From the blog of Splendid Elles, a volunteer at the Museum:

"I once asked one of the staff members what I should do if a visitor insisted on saying the Earth is 6,000 years old. That's when he first told me about BC Tours, and how when they showed up, everyone would say "they're here" in a spiteful manner.

"Unfortunately, there is nothing they [the museum] can do. The museum is a public institution and people can go there and have their own tours if they wish, so long as they don't harass anybody in the exhibit. That's the only time when they're allowed to kick the creationists out.

"They were able to get them to stop putting the museum logo on their website, and got one of the "tour guides" to stop wearing a lab coat because they want to make it clear that BC Tours do not represent the museum.

"If there was anything more the museum could do, they would... But, to protect our freedom of speech, we have to protect theirs."

Just so. You all know I loves me some 1st Amendment rights. But that doesn't make these idiots any smarter, or less hypocritical.

I can only assume the staffs at the other locations are equally delighted by this asshat invasion.

Want to know which part makes them complete and utter 'tards?

The part where they use electricity, the Internet, modern medicine and other technological wonders that are based on the very methods they deny.

Here we have another issue of credibility. As near as I can tell, the tour guides do not hold degrees in any scientific discipline, let alone evolutionary biology. Yet they feel completely and utterly justified in putting their commentary forward as "Truth" (with a capital "T," remember) in the very home of science. And, it turns out, in a fucking lab coat, for fuck's sake. Pretentious much, you ignoramus?

BC Tours, you are absolutely, positively the 'Tard of the Week. Possibly even the 'Tard of the Last 6,000 Years.

UCFapalooza! (With Pictures)

So Michelle and Michael arrived on Sunday night for their all-too-short visit to the Rocky Mountain Branch of the UCF. They had a long drive, so we visited for only a short while before we all went to bed. But not before I got some loot!

That's tasty cinnamon bread, some chocolate, a banned books bracelet, and some very cool yarn. Unseen here is the beer Michael brought. Hmm...beer. Thanks, Michelle and Michael!

I had to work for a couple of hours in the morning due to the incompetence of others (don't get me started), so we got a somewhat late start on our activities. The good news is that by the time we arrived at the tasting room of the Coors Brewery, it was almost noon, so Michael and I didn't feel too bad about doing some quality control tasting. Hmm...beer. Here's Michael and Michelle in front of the Coors copper kettle in front of the brewery.

These kettles are still in use inside the brewery:

Here's one of me in front of the Navy section of the Coors military memorial:

We then met Anne and the Smart Man at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, one of my favorite places on Planet Earth. People who don't think going to a Nature and Science Museum can be a blast have never been with a bunch of self-confident geeks. From Michael's recitation of the intro to "Star Trek" as we entered the space exhibit to the constant - and I mean constant - references to Young Earth Creationists, we never stopped laughing.

Here's Michael, Michelle and Anne playing in the Martian sand:

Here we are about to feed our imaginary coconuts to the T-Rex behind us (nomnomnomnom):

After the Museum, it was off to Racine's, a local Denver haunt, for dinner and drinks. When we arrived, I got more loot! This time from Anne.

Yes, those are bittersweet brownies, nomnomnomnom. And a cool book on how to do cool patterns with my knitting hoops! Thanks, Anne!

We ate, we drank, we solved the problems of the world. And we made a few..ahem...phone calls to other members of the UCF. Drinking and dialing, don't try this at home. Here we are at the end of the meal:

Then Anne had to take Michelle and Michael to the train station, which was a bummer.

It was a total blast to meet Michelle and Michael. Michelle is as gracious and fun as her on-line personality suggests, and Michael was as charming and funny as I would expect Michelle's mate to be.

Thanks for stopping by the Rocky Mountain UCF, guys! You're welcome here anytime.

You Know You Love It

Monday, September 15, 2008

Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume XVI

This is Irena Sendlerowa. She passed away on May 12, 2008.

During World War II Ms. Sendlerowa was an activist in the Polish Underground and the ┼╗egota Polish anti-Holocaust resistance in Warsaw. She helped save 2,500 Jewish children from the Warsaw Ghetto by providing them with false documents and sheltering them in individual and group children's homes outside the Ghetto.

A Catholic social worker, Ms. Sendlerowa was allowed inside the Ghetto in order to inspect the residents for typhoid and dysentery. She did this with the approval of the Nazis who were afraid the diseases would spread beyond the Ghetto. Once inside, she would smuggle out children in boxes, suitcases, coffins and trolleys. Older children would escape through the sewers. All were placed in foster homes, with new identities, by Ms. Sendlerowa and her support system. She would write down the real name of each child, and stored them in a jar she buried in her yard. Her intention was to reunite these children with their families after the war ended.

In 1943, Ms. Sendlerowa was captured by the Gestapo. She was tortured and sentenced to death, but ┼╗egota was able to rescue her and hide her for the duration of the war, but not before the Gestapo had broken both of her arms and legs.

Her inspiration for this incredible life? Her father, a medical doctor, had died from typhus in 1917, treating Jewish patients. As he was dying, he told 7-year-old Irena, “If you see someone drowning you must try to rescue them, even if you cannot swim.”

Just so.

Irena Sandlerowa. Courageous. Resourceful. A moral beacon. Truly ill-behaved.


H/T to my Great Aunt Marge for the inspiration, and to the Life in a Jar Project for details.

Sunday, Sunday

Sunday, September 14, 2008
Today the Smart Man and I will be going to see the new Coen brothers film, Burn After Reading. I love the Coen brothers, although No Country for Old Men was more than a little odd. Good, but odd. Fargo was simply the best movie evah.

"And I guess that was your accomplice in the wood chipper."

Hehe.

Later tonight, fellow UCF member Michelle and her Smart Man will be arriving here at the Parker UCF outpost. Hooray! We have big plans for tomorrow including a tour of the Coors Brewery in Golden, and then meeting fellow Hot Chick Anne at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, one of my favorite places on Planet Earth. Double Hooray! It will be Michelle's first chance to meet any of the UCF, and you know she's going to be squealing like a little girl, right alongside Anne and I. Pictures will be taken, oh, yes.

We'll keep you apprised of exciting events as they unfold!

Updated 9/14/2008 2:00 p.m.

I laughed my ass off. Seriously. Pure Coen brothers hilarity. Hee!

Updated 9/14/2008 10:00 p.m.

They're Hee-eeere! Bwahahahaha!

Adulthood = Accountability

Saturday, September 13, 2008
Occasionally, I have discussions with the Smart Boy about "what it means to be a successful adult."

The list usually includes such things as "get a job," and "pay your own bills," and "as long as you live in your mommy's house, you're not an adult," and "adults pay respectful attention to their franchise."

But lately I've decided that the heart of adulthood is accountability. And by accountability, I mean holding yourself accountable.

Holding yourself accountable to be a contributing member of society, including supporting yourself and your dependents without mooching off your family, your friends, your society.

Holding yourself accountable to be an informed voter, to learn what you need to learn in order to vote intelligently and responsibly.

Holding yourself accountable for keeping your word to others, whether that's being where you're supposed to be at the time you're supposed to be there, or completing a task that you've committed to do.

Holding yourself accountable for making things right when you screw up, whether that's falling on your sword with your boss, apologizing to a child, or changing your behavior for the future.

Holding yourself accountable for continuing to learn, to be a well-rounded and interesting person.

Holding yourself accountable for treating others with respect, for being kind, for leaving the world a better place when you die.

And the more I thought about these things, the more I realized how very many children I know. Children who live in adult bodies, and pretend to live adult lives, but who really are not adults, at least not by the yardstick I use. I myself did not achieve true adulthood in every aspect until I was in my 30's -it's a work in progress.

Of course this begs the question - if all these children in adult bodies are not really adults, then am I required to give their ideas, their demands, their opinions, the same consideration and weight I would to a real adult? Or am I only required to treat them as overgrown children?

Boogie Blogging Friday

Friday, September 12, 2008

The Incomparable Boogie™, who's feeling a bit bipolar today.

He's happy because he got his soft cast off. Yippee!

He's sad because his fabulous groomer, Ms. Gigi, had to shave his leg because of the matting. Rather than having one shaved leg and three fuzzy legs, he has four shaved legs and looks like a plucked chicken. Bummer.

He's happy because he can resume his daily walks, although he has to stay on-leash for awhile. Yippee!

He's sad because it's been raining pretty steadily since last night, and the Incomparable Boogie™ does not like to go out in the rain. Bummer.

His vet says the X-ray still shows the bone is broken, but he's not gimpy at all, and has no pain response during the exam. So he's off the hook unless he starts limping again.

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 34


Cindy McCain loathes VP candidate Sarah Palin! She called her a "trailer trash redneck!"* Is Cindy jealous? Will a cat-fight be next? Who Cares!

*I saw this on the cover of a tabloid in the super-market check-out, so it must be true.

What I Remember

Thursday, September 11, 2008
The general population finally recognizing the risk of service.

Pimpin', Yo


Since our good friend Eric has decided to start pimping out his sister, I thought I'd get on the pander bandwagon and dedicate some bandwidth to a good cause.

Robin Hood is a NYC based charity that helps the poor by funding local programs targeted at poverty relief. According to Charity Navigator, they have a bitchin' 4 out of 4 stars, with a whopping 92.4% of their income and revenue going towards program expenses. Go, Robin Hood!

In any case, Robbin (Eric's sister, not the charity) is running a marathon, and has decided to "Race for Robin Hood." She's looking for some donations to help her achieve her goal of $5,000.00 for this worthy cause.

If you're a Hot Chick or Smart Man with some wiggle room in your charitable contributions budget, check out Robbin's page and give up the green for a worthy cause.

Good luck to Robbin and Oscar the Dog!

And So the World Ends

Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Well, clearly the world has ended. The scientists at CERN have fired up the LHC, and the catastrophic particles have collided.* Life as we know it has ended, and from now on our topsy-turvey existence will have no rhyme or reason.

How do I know?

I know because I agree with George Will.

In the September 8, 2008 issue of Newsweek, Mr. Will wrote an essay called for Heepism vs. Elitism for The Last Word column. In this piece, Mr. Will outlines the idea that the presidential candidates are now being expected to empathize with the populace in ways that were never considered in the early days of our country. A failure to do so is considered "elitism," and is a negative trait in today's campaigns.

But why? Why is elitism a negative trait?

If a candidate has not lived on the knife-edge of poverty, then there's a pretty good bet that they don't know what that feels like - the stress, the fear, the constant worrying about the future. But it doesn't mean the candidate can't make the working poor a priority, it doesn't mean they can't author legislation to assist people who need help or increase funding to education. Why does their lack of poverty make them less qualified to lead? If they were raised in a family that valued public service and empathy for the less fortunate, then a case can be made that they might be more effective.

Here's the part of Mr. Will's essay that spells it out for me:

"Charges of 'elitism' are hardy perennials, but surely Americans can accept two axioms. The first is: The central principle of republican government is representation, under which the people do not decide issues, they decide who shall decide. The second is: Elections decide not whether elites shall rule but which elites shall rule."

Just so. Since I live in a reality-based world, I have to admit that Mr. Will is correct. I also have to admit that having an "elite" govern is preferable. While I admire coal miners and bus drivers, and consider them honorable professions, I don't think people in those jobs are more qualified to lead the free world than constitutional law professors or honorable career politicians.

Romanticism is fine, but I want a leader who will get things done, who will move our country forward in a positive direction and fix the problems of the last eight years. And I think an "elite" is probably the person who can get that done. I want the best person for the job - the person with the best education, the best intellect, the best experience, the best ideas. And if they are considered "the best" in one or more of those criteria, are they not, by definition, "elite?"

So clearly, the world as we know it has ended. When I, a hippy liberal, agrees with George Will, a conservative of biblical proportion, that's all the proof I need.

"Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!"

It can only go downhill from here. Stupid LHC.


*Yes, I know they haven't started collision experiments. I'm engaging in hyperbole.

'Tard of the Week - Walter Wagner, Alarmist

Tuesday, September 9, 2008
This is an historic week. This week, the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), located on the French/Swiss border is coming on-line. The LHC is run under the purview of CERN, the largest particle physics laboratory in the world, inventor of the World Wide Web and one of the preeminent science think tanks in the world. I've been following its progress through Bad Astronomy and some other websites. This thing is off the hook cool.

The purpose of the LHC is to conduct experiments to help us determine how the Universe works. From the big bang to the God Particle, they're interested in all of it.

So this week's 'tard is the dipshit alarmist who feels that the Large Hadron Collider is dangerous and shouldn't be used. He's brought lawsuits, he's demonstrated, he's made his opinion known. At his request, the LHC folks issued a safety study on the LHC and the probability that using the LHC will generate a black hole and suck us all into nothingness.

Folks, meet Dr. Walter Wagner, who runs "Citizens Against the Large Hadron Collider." Dr. Wagner's bio indicates that he "graduated UC Berkeley with a Minor in Physics, and a Major in Biology," but it very carefully doesn't say what his graduate level work is in, other that a mention of law school. My (admittedly haphazard) research indicates his only physics degree is that minor undergraduate work mentioned above.

Well. I'm not typically an education snob - I believe you can be an incredibly intelligent individual without having a string of degrees after your name. I believe the intellectually curious can be better educated than many degreed professionals.

But this is particle physics. A seriously specialized field of endeavor. That requires years and years of single-minded study and effort to understand. Years and effort that Dr. Wagner has (apparently) not put in, although he does have experience in nuclear medicine.

But others have put in the years and effort. According to the vast majority of physicists who are qualified to address these concerns, the LHC will not generate a black hole that will have sufficient gravity to cause harm.

I'm not saying that people with opposing opinions should not be heard. If a member of the project team, or some other particle physicist who understood the complexities of the Collider raised an alarm, then it might be different.

I'm not qualified to judge the work of the LHC physicists in terms of their safety report. I know this about myself. I understand my limitations. I don't have the education or the background, so I have to go by the consensus of informed opinion. And the consensus of informed opinion is that the danger posed by the LHC is minuscule.

And Dr. Wagner? Your opinion is not informed. You are not qualified. Credibility matters. You don't have any, and you're a 'tard.

This and That

Monday, September 8, 2008
- The federal government has taken control of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae in an effort to stabilize our economy. While I'm hoping that this means that the average consumer will no longer be bitch-slapped by the invisible hand of Adam Smith, I am highly suspect that the federal government can effectively stabilize anything.

- Turns out former Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez was even dumber than previously thought. His mishandling of classified information is so egregious, I have a hard time believing the story's veracity. But then I remember that he was appointed by that bastion of intellectual accomplishment, George W. Bush, and suddenly the world makes sense again.

- In another shocking development, it appears that the White House routinely ignored the recommendations of the Joint Chiefs of Staff in regards to the war in Iraq. Is it January yet?

- I've been working on an RFP (Request for Proposal) for the last week or so. I hate RFP's. I hate them with the white-hot passion of a thousand suns. Whoever invented this vomitous process should have their pubes pulled out with tweezers one at a time, followed by their nose hairs. Unfortunately, they're the process standard used in my industry, so I see them fairly frequently. The problem with this one? The account team requested engineering support on August 27th, and I was assigned immediately. It's now Monday, September 8th, and I received the final scope on Saturday. But it's Absolutely Imperative that I provide my deliverable As Soon As Possible, because, clearly, I'm Holding Up the Show. The design in question has 130 locations, and they want several options. And this is why I dislike working with sales people.

So I'll be scarce for a bit, while I churn and burn in an effort to meet these people's expectations. If you need me, I'll be the one with the blood dripping out of my ears...

Yesterday's Celebrity Sighting

Sunday, September 7, 2008
Dog the Bounty Hunter, and his equally tasteful wife, at the Park Meadows Mall. Why, yes, they do dress like this in public when the cameras aren't rolling.

In spite of their unnatural attachment to 80's hair and the absolute putrescence that is their reality TV show, there's a small part of me that admires ole Dog for going after convicted rapist Andrew Luster in Mexico when Andrew fled from the long arm of the law. It appeals on a visceral level, that some classless mullet-haired dork could bring down a multimillionaire heir.

But I've always had a soft-spot for the underdogs. No pun intended.

On a similar note, I have to say that Mrs. Dog is a woman who understands the importance of supportive foundation undergarments. In spite of her glaring tackiness, I have to say I'd rather look at her than the droopy family.

Saturday Project

Saturday, September 6, 2008
This is the planter under the front window of our house. My project this week was to remove the purple, thorny bush that was growing in the middle. I hated that bush. Hated it. It grew incredibly fast, and the fine thorns made it a bitch to prune.

So the Smart Boy and his buddy pulled it out on Thursday, and today I went and bought this Blue Mist Spirea. It was recommended by the Smart Boy, who has been working at a local nursery since May, and already knows much more about plants and gardening than I do. His nursery was having a big sale this weekend, so I got a smoking deal, even without the employee discount.

I also cleared the back flower bed (home of the pernicious snit) in preparation for planting something else next spring.

I love summer, but it's winding down. Bummer.

Hmm...Satire!

You know I loves me some satire. Via SkepChick, here's my latest find: "Landover Baptist, Where the Worthwhile Worship, Unsaved Unwelcome."

I could spend days at this website, and spend hundreds in their gift shop. I'm especially fond of the "back to school" products.

I think I would look quite fetching in a "Landover Baptist Creation Science Club" T-Shirt, don't you?

::snort::

Attention Women!

Friday, September 5, 2008
If your girls are so large and ponderous that, when unsupported, they literally hang below your waist and give the impression that you are pregnant - perhaps you should rethink that whole "unsupported in public" fashion decision.

Please. My eyes can only take so much lye before they will shrivel up and become dessicated raisins in my sockets.

And the fact that your male companion and daughter also sported this fashion-don't...with similar results...means I have this family image burned into my retina for the duration.

Oh, Honey. No. Just No.

Boogie Blogging Friday

My camera's acting wonky, so you'll have to take my word for it - Boogie the Giant Schnauzer needs a bath and a haircut. He's not been allowed to go to the groomer since he broke his toe, and he's turning into a musty, curly mess with no eyes.

And his toenails need trimming. He's starting to look like a velociraptor.

One more week, then hopefully, the soft cast will come off...

The Resemblance is Frightening




What?










H/T to Cindi in CO

Smaller is Better...and Get Off My Lawn

I've decided that when it comes to on-line communities, smaller is better.

Scalzi's recent entry about reminding people to be, you know, civil, is a case in point.

The Whatever and the Whateveresque used to be places where people of good conscience could discuss issues that mattered to them like adults. I enjoyed commenting, and responding to the comments of others. I've met some interesting, funny and decent people through those communities.

Alas, I feel that is no longer the case. The flinging monkey poo reached epic proportions on the Whateveresque at one point, and it now appears the silly season is affecting the Whatever in the same way. I no longer even read the comments, let alone respond. It makes me glad that my little corner of the Intertoobs is small enough that the crazies haven't taken up residence.

Ah, for the good ole days...and get off my lawn.

August 'Tard of the Month

It's that time again - time to vote for the August 'Tard of the Month.

This month's choices include Ludacris, that bastion of great political thought; Reginald Peterson, whose condiment emergency made the news; Christopher Kron, who has to be the most inept burgler on the planet; The "Recreate '68" protesters, who's sense of entitlement made them an easy target for the DPD; and PUMA, who have decided they will be so much more becoming by cutting off their nose to spite their face.