Rationalization and Moral Courage

Wednesday, November 3, 2010
I think most people have a sense of right and wrong. Not sociopaths, of course, but the majority of the population. People know it's not right to steal, or to cheat, or to lie. They know (or I sincerely hope they know) that sinning against their fellow human beings diminishes them.

And yet, people do steal, or cheat, or lie, or sin against their neighbors in some other fashion, so much so that many times we don't even consider it an unusual or noteworthy occurrence. And you know why? Rationalization. Rationalization is the killer of moral courage, and in our minds, excuses our crappy behavior and allows us to get what we want and still live with ourselves.

I think everyone's guilty of this, to a greater or lesser degree - I know I am. We mitigate our shame at our bad behavior by demonizing those against whom we've sinned. We minimize our culpability to the point where, in our own minds, we bear almost no responsibility for others' pain. We excuse ourselves by saying that the injured party wasn't really hurt that bad.

I think the true test of whether or not someone is a grown up is where they reside on the rationalization/moral courage scale. You expect children to rationalize their bad behavior, or to try and wiggle out of the consequences of breaking the social compact. But as the maturing process continues, the expectation becomes that the moral courage side of the scale starts to weigh more heavily than the rationalization side. Part of this is the emotional maturity to be honest with ourselves about how our behavior affects other people, but really - the key virtue is courage. The courage to admit our own mistakes, make restitution, and improve our lives and our behavior moving forward.

I don't know that anyone ever achieves true freedom from rationalizing our bad behavior. But it's sure worth trying.

1 comments:

Anne C. said...

Well, you know how I feel about courage and cowardice, so "ditto."

(One of the many reasons I adore you, my friend.)

exessib = buying a whole case of Kleenex, even if you DO have a cold.