'Tard of the Week - Democrats

Friday, April 30, 2010
I may bash the right on a fairly regular basis, but really - they don't have a corner on the market when it comes stupid ideas and an inability to be forthright.

Case in point: The Democrats' phenomenally retarded idea for "biometric employment verification" to get a handle on the illegal hiring of illegal immigrants. As noted by celebrity seraglio candidate Ezra Klein over at the Washington Post, what this really means is a biometric national ID card, and no amount of wiggling and mealy-mouthed explanations on the part of the Dems is going to change that. 

I'm kind of opposed to a national ID card on principle, and a biometric ID card gives me the shivers. Of course, it could just be political posturing, with no intention on the part of the Dems to actually follow through. Shocking, I know - that an American political party would try to manipulate the system in such a way.

Cynical...who, me?

Congratulations, Dems, you get to join the right as a Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men 'Tard of the Week.

Boogie Blogging Friday - BLANKIE!




I < 3 Hubble

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


I love the Hubble Space Telescope. Some of its images grace the walls of the Big Yellow House, and the wallpaper on my various computers are all Hubble images. I know it's nearing the end of its working life and scientists are now looking toward what the James Webb Space Telescope can teach us. But to me, "space telescope" will always mean "Hubble."

________________
This was shamelessly stolen from my celebrity boyfriend, the Bad Astronomer.

Fuck Off, Hobby Lobby

Tuesday, April 27, 2010
I've decided to stop shopping at Hobby Lobby.

Not because they're a Christian company - I've known that for years and years, and that didn't stop me from spending a significant portion of my crafting budget there. Quite frankly, I don't give a good goddamn if the owners of an establishment choose to run their business on "Christian principles," whatever the hell that means, and Michelle has convinced me that closing retail establishments on Sundays is a good thing for all sorts of secular reasons.  What I do care about is that their customer service doesn't suck salt water and that the company's outside activities don't make me want to heave.

Well.

When I was out counter-protesting the WBC whackadoodles on Saturday, one of the attendees told me that he had "heard" that WBC received funding for their hateful activities from Hobby Lobby. Now, I'm not the kind of person who takes action based on information from the third bullshitter from the left. So I've been looking for confirmation of this accusation since then. I haven't found any (it appears to be a unsubstantiated rumor), but when I was trying to chase it down, I found out some really disturbing information about Hobby Lobby as a corporation.

Based on what I've read*, it appears that Hobby Lobby's ministry is of a particularly offensive flavor called Dominionism. Now I knew there were plenty of folks out there who take that "America is a Christian Nation!" canard more seriously than they ought. But these Dominionism fucksticks - they are completely off the rails. 

They apparently believe that not only should our secular institutions take their clues from "Christianity," but that there shouldn't be a secular government - we should all just bow down before Evangelical Christianity as the Law of the Land.

I'm a huge fan of the Constitution, and one of my favorite elements is the establishment clause. So the fact that a bunch of Evangelical Christians, a group whose ideas make me mildly ill, think establishing a Christian version of Shari'a is just the BEST IDEA EVAH makes me more than a little uncomfortable. And the fact that I'm contributing my own money to this excrescence through purchasing my supplies at Hobby Lobby makes me throw up in my mouth.

Hobby Lobby is a privately owned company. They're entitled to spend their profits however they wish. And I'm entitled to spend my disposable income however I wish.

So yeah - fuck off, Hobby Lobby. Hello, Michael's and Joann's.

_______________________
*I'm not a huge fan of the Daily Kos, but this article was the best consolidation of links and additional information that I found.

Boobquake - 2010!

Monday, April 26, 2010
That's right - today is BOOBQUAKE 2010. It started as a joke in response to the ridiculous claims of Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi that earthquakes were God's response to the immodesty of women. A college student decided to offer her boobs to science, and suggested that today, women should dress in an immodest fashion to see if we couldn't generate an earthquake

It quickly morphed into an Internet phenom, with a large Facebook Group, and the young woman who made the initial boob joke, Jen McCreight, has been dashing all over, being interviewed, and trying to turn this into something worthwhile

Well, far be it from me not to jump on the bandwagon when it comes to immodest behavior, so I'll be strutting around my home office in my wonder bra and tight, low-cut shirt today. Of course, the only one I'll be tempting is Boogie the Giant Schnauzer, who is far more interested in crunchy sweet potato sticks than political statements, but hey - it's the principle of the thing. 

Principled boobs - I can't think of anything more appropriate as a symbol of the skeptical movement. 

Shake 'em if you've got 'em, ladies.  

2010 Flower Pr0n, Edition the Third

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Hens and Chicks!


Lonely Tulip.

Running Off the Whackos

Saturday, April 24, 2010
Today, members of the Westboro Baptist Church descended on the greater Denver area to protest various Jewish temples and synagogues, as well as a local Jewish community center. Apparently because the Jews killed Christ. Please note that bringing up the fact that the Romans killed Christ, or that Jesus himself was a Jew is beside the point and will not be addressed, lalala-I-can't-hear-you.

So in a show of solidarity, the Incomparable Anne™, our friend Stacey, and my very own Smart Girl headed out to counter-demonstrate the whackadoodles.

Let me note here that, as usual, the WBC whackos were outnumbered by counter-protesters at all fifteen of their Denver stops, in some cases by a huge margin. Since it appeared that there was only eight of them (including the two children they brought - gotta bring 'em up right in the spirit of hatred and intolerance), this was not a difficult thing to do.

Our first stop was Temple Sinai. The whackadoodles were across the street from us, and we were lined up in front of the temple. The wind was blowing and it was cold, but a member of the Board of Directors came out to thank us for our support and offer us the use of their restrooms. I appreciated her coming out to speak to us, as the main reason I decided to go ahead and participate in the counter-demonstration was because I didn't want the Jewish community of Denver to think that the WBC targeting them for their hatefulness was in any way okay with the larger community. I'm glad we got that point across, and it made the experience really worthwhile.

Our next stop was Temple Emmanuel. It was here that we met this lovely father/daughter team, whose signs maketh me to giggle:


Awesome corn-dogs, indeed.

::snort::

Here's me, Anne, the Smart Girl, and Stacey, bundled up against the weather:


And we also made a new friend named "Godfrey." Godfrey apparently took the verse 1 John 4 quite literally, but believes there's a typo. It should actually read, "Godfrey is love." This was quite possibly the friendliest dog I have ever met.


After a tasty lunch at the Spicy Pickle, our last stop was the Robert E. Loup Jewish Community Center. This is where things got interesting. At first the whackos stayed on their side of the street, and we stayed on ours. Here they are, in their lonely, lonely splendor:


Then counter-protesters started crossing the street and holding their signs in front of the whackadoos (you can see a couple there on the right, in the pink Nazi outfits). Soon the counter-protesters started invading the whackos personal space, and the police ended up closing in to ensure things didn't get out of control. The end result of this strategy was that the whackos left the protest 15 minutes early and drove away in their minivan.

I doubt we'll miss them, but I think I would have been happier if we could have kept the dividing line between "us and them" more firmly established. I did not cross the street, as I doubt the police would have let me off with a warning for punching them in the throat just because my dad was a peace officer.

Overall, this was a very positive experience, and motorists were honking and giving us the "thumbs up" as they drove past. Here's one of my favorite signs of the protest:


This was very true. Everyone we chatted with was there because they wanted to express their solidarity with the communities that had been targeted by these hate-mongers. There were folks from every walk of life, every sexual orientation, every religious belief, every political persuasion. The one thing we had in common was a desire to show that Phelps and crew are the outliers in our communities, an in fact, aren't members of our communities AT ALL.

My other favorite signs from the protest:
  • You have a Typo! God Hates FIGS.
  • Pineapple is Very Tasty
  • Where's Waldo?
  • Thor Loves Kittens
And my personal favorite:  God Hates Shrimp! Leviticus 11:9-12.

Off to see the Rockies in their second game of a double-header against the Marlins. Hurray for love, tolerance and solidarity! 

Peace, Love and Understanding

Today, the Incomparable Anne™, our friend Stacey and me will be counter-demonstrating the freeze-dried whackaloons from the Westboro Baptist Church as they protest local Denver Jewish institutions. I plan on taking some pictures, singing some songs, and not getting arrested.

It's about peace, love and understanding, not punching the Phelps clan in the throat.

Besides, the Smart Man and I have tickets to the Rockies/Marlins game this evening, and I'm not missing out on beer and dogs over those whackos.

Have a nice Saturday, Hot Chicks and Smart Men.

Chick Stuff - Rockin' My Emmylou Hair

Friday, April 23, 2010
So my au naturale silver hair is finally starting to get longer. Not quite rockin' it like my silver haired mentor, Emmylou Harris, but it's getting there.

Which brings us to today's question: While realizing that Emmylou Harris is one of those rare women who actually got better looking as she got older (and she was no slouch as a younger woman, either), how appropriate is it for middle aged women with silver hair to wear longer styles? For a normal human who does not have access to stylists before they're seen in public, does wearing a long, layered style like my girl Emmylou make you look older, like you're trying too hard, more beautiful, more chic?
Inquiring minds NEED TO KNOW BEFORE THEY SPEND ANY MORE TIME GROWING THEIR HAIR OUT, Y'ALL.


Sorry about the quality of my photo. Really, really sorry. My hair is actually an inch or so longer than in that photo.

Why?

Thursday, April 22, 2010
Why would someone go through the trouble, pain and recovery of gastric bypass surgery, and then gain all the weight back?

I'm not being judgey. I really want to know, and I have no point of reference. No one in my family has ever been morbidly obese (although we tend to get heavier as we get older), and I've never been close to anyone who experienced that particular health problem.

I'm not talking about those of us who need to lay down the dessert fork and spend a little more time on the elliptical (myself included). I'm talking about people whose daily activities were so compromised by their weight they went through the surgery to correct the problem, and then gained it back, and found themselves in the same boat they were in before.

Please don't tell me they're undisciplined slobs, or don't care about their health, or some other thoughtless explanation. If that's your opinion, then feel free to express it elsewhere. I'm very interested in this, as I think it relates to self-destructive behavior in general. Does anyone have any insight on this issue?

I Don't Get It

Wednesday, April 21, 2010
There's a lot of things I don't get. In fact, you could build a monument to the things I don't get, including calculus, the nature of time, and why people would rather be petty than do the right thing.

But that doesn't mean I don't try. With the exception of the on-its-face-stoopid (::cough::Young Earth Creationism::cough::), I do make an effort to expand my intellectual horizons. In spite of my trepidation regarding all things numerically related, I took statistics last semester, and got an "A." I'm currently listening to Sean Carroll's book, From Eternity to Here: The Quest for the Ultimate Theory of Time.* I continue to explore human nature as it relates to the decisions people make, and make an effort to see things from someone else's point of view.

But here's something I really don't get, and really have no desire to make an effort to "get it:" People who lack any sort of intellectual curiosity.

I simply don't understand how someone can spend their life doing the same things every day, performing the same tasks, watching the same insipid reality television, never reading anything, and never learning anything new. Every day's the same as the last. Every conversation is predicated on outside influence, because there's no life of the mind.

Aren't they bored? What do they talk about? How do they form their opinions?

Really - I don't get it at all.

___________
*In chapter three, Dr. Carroll referred to certain sections of the universe as lumpy. This has earned him a place in my celebrity seraglio. Hee.

Being Customer-Centric

Tuesday, April 20, 2010
You know that stupid Myers-Briggs personality test? The one managers make you take to determine what "type" of personality you have when they don't know what else to do?

Yeah, I hate that test.

But every time I've been forced to take it, it's been "revealed" that my first dichotomy is "X," instead of "E" (for extrovert) or "I" (for introvert). This supposedly means that I'm equidistant from these two places - that I'm equally likely to want to be alone or with others. What it means to me is that I'm uniquely suited, from a personality point of view, to the job I have. Technical people are usually introverted, but sales people are usual extroverted. Since I do aspects of both jobs, I need to be able to find contentment in both aspects of the job.

But here's the problem.

I also have a distinct lack of patience, which sometimes translates into a less than customer-centric attitude. My tendencies toward introversion means that, occasionally, when my customers need my help, I'm less inclined to ask them how I can assist them, and more likely to wonder why the Hell everyone appears so damn helpless. Don't get me wrong - it's not like I tell my customers to die in a fire when they have the temerity to ask me for help. I know who pays my salary, and a large part of my job is customer service. Most days, I do want to help my customers - if they're successful, then I'm successful, and I want them to think of me as someone who's there to help them.

But some days, especially days when I've had to spend a lot of time with other people (as opposed to living, cave-like, in my basement), I want someone else to help them, and for everyone to go away and leave me the Hell alone.

I've been working on that patience thing for years, like my whole life. It's a never-ending tug-of-war between the "E" and the "I." I'm hoping once I'm retired I can just drop it, become a curmudgeon, and tell people to get off my lawn.

A girl can dream...

Same Behavior, Same Result

Monday, April 19, 2010
Of all the life lessons I've had to learn (and relearn, and learn again) over the years, this is the one that's taken me the longest to get through my thick skull.

I was in my thirties before I realized that the predictable results of my life, both good and bad, were a direct result of my own, repeated behavior. I've always worked hard and learned everything I could about my professional responsibilities, and the result I got from that behavior was positive. Quick promotions, regular raises, positive performance reviews. Same behavior, same result - positive, positive.

Of course, the opposite is also true - same behavior, same result, negative, negative. I was married three times before I came to the stunningly obvious conclusion that I was the one who had to change. I needed to make better choices, I needed to approach long-term, serious relationships in a different way, I needed to choose the outcome and then make decisions that led me to the goal.

Just an emotional retard - that's me.

I suppose I should be grateful - some people, people I know, don't EVER learn this lesson, and embody the definition of insanity. At least I learned the lesson early enough to change the fundamental direction of my life, and kept my regrets to things I can manage. If I don't like an aspect of my life, I have the power to change it in a way that will lead to a different result through the only thing I can control - my own behavior.

Now, that's power.

2010 Flower Pr0n, Edition the Second

Sunday, April 18, 2010

This vine is always the first thing to bloom in my yard. Which is strange, because it grows on the North side of the house that gets almost no direct sunshine whatsoever.

And also...duh-duh-duh!


It's...pernicious snit! Although in this case, I planted it intentionally. The ground cover on the tiers on the North side of the house doesn't do too well (due to the no direct sunshine issue), and I figured if anything would grow and thrive there it would be the snit. So two summers ago I put one root piece in one tier, and now it's spreading, as I intended. I'll have to keep an eye on it to make sure it doesn't take over the house like the Zombie hordes, but, so far, so good.

It's a beautiful day here in Colorado. The Smart Man is off taking advantage of the weather and playing nine holes with his Smart Friends, there's Hungarian Goulash in the slow cooker and I think I see a pedicure in my own future. Enjoy your Sunday, Hot Chicks and Smart Men.

Let's Be Productive

Saturday, April 17, 2010
Or not.

Actually, I have been somewhat productive today. I went to the dentist and picked up the mouth guard that will hopefully prevent me from breaking any more teeth by grinding them away to dust at night while I'm sleeping.* I finally made it to the post office, and four boxes of jam are now winging their way West, East and North (far North, in one case. As in, Arctic Circle North). And now I'm writing a paper for my Science, Technology and Markets class entitled, "A Research Journal Case Study Summary - An Assessment of the Small Business Innovation Research Program at the National Institutes of Health." Yeah. It's putting me to sleep, too, and I'm writing the damn thing.

The one bright spot was my discovery of a new-to-me band called Goldspot I bought their latest EP on iTunes, And the Elephant is Dancing. They've been described as "Bollywood Pop," but their music just makes me happy, which is a good enough reason to throw them some cash. Here's "Call Center Girl."



_____________
*That fucking thing was $300.00. Seriously - $300.00. The only thing that pushed me into buying it was the fact that the implant to replace the broken tooth was ten times that amount. Who's the dumbass who thinks dental care shouldn't be included as part of medical care, again?

Boogie Blogging Friday - Mensa Edition

Friday, April 16, 2010
I was in the backyard this morning, taking photos of my sparse early Spring flowers, and, as usual, the Boogie-Dog accompanied me. Now that spring is here, he's back to tearing up my bushes and chewing on the branches. Because he's so very helpful.

After I was done, I looked for Boogie, and found him laying on the grass, twisting his head around. I went to investigate, and found that he had his upper left canine stuck in the hole of this, and couldn't dislodge it:


I have no idea where it came from, but leave it to Boogie to find it and get it stuck on his teeth.

Yeah. A real Mensa candidate is this dog.

Today's Burning Question: Auto-Negotiate, or Lockdown?

So which is the work of the devil - auto-negotiate, or lockdown?*

___________
*If you have no idea what I'm talking about, then please - just move along. Nothing to see here. These aren't the 'droids you're looking for.

Music Week

Thursday, April 15, 2010
It's apparently Music Week among the UCF, and I'm nothing if not a jump-on-the-bandwagon kind of gal.

Here's Grace Potter and the Nocturnals, singing one of their best cuts from This is Somewhere, a really excellent EP.

Slacker

Just a note for those of you to whom I owe jam -

The jam is actually MADE, and the last batch, which I made Sunday, has settled enough to be shipped. Now I just have to get the boxes together and get them in the mail. Given my current Out of Pocket, Out of My Mind status, I have no idea when that will actually be. Because I'm a big SLACKER, you see. But I'm a SLACKER who hasn't forgotten about you! No, no! I'm a SLACKER who's painfully aware of my obligations, but who can't seem to get 'er done...

Ahem. I TOLD YOU that the longer I was going to be forced to leave my house on a daily basis, the closer I was going to come to LOSING MY DAMN MIND.

My Latest Project

Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Most of you know that I like to knit. I have no skill whatsoever with actual knitting needles, though, so I use a variety of looms, instead.

These are my latest projects - lap robes for the patients at the Cheyenne, Wyoming VA Medical Center.

I've been knitting lap robes for this facility for a number of years, but usually I make them with leftover yarn in a patchwork fashion. For these robes, though, I went out and purchased the yarn so I could create the robes to honor the five services with their colors. I just finished the Coast Guard today, and these will go up to Longmont with my Hot Mom this weekend for delivery to the VA.

It doesn't take much to make me happy.

I Would Not Eat Them on a Train...

As any current or former member of the U.S. Navy knows, the culture includes certain "initiations" for watershed events. These include, but aren't limited to, initiation into the ranks of the Chief Petty Officer and Shellbacks, which means you've crossed the equator in a Naval ship.

Initiations of these types almost always include the consumption of various disgusting food items as part of the process. In deference to my more tender-minded readers, I'm not going to detail the choices here, but suffice it to say that they really are disgusting. I'm not talking about foods that are "different," I'm talking DISGUSTING. The more disgusting, the better, and the worse it smells, the better. I know whereof I speak - I'm an initiated Chief, and a Shellback.

Which goes a long way in explaining why I'm not really interested in eating things that smell bad, or looks like it's already been through someone, or has a texture that feels gross. Food is a source of pleasure for me, and I can't see the point of eating something that promises to be not a source of pleasure, but something that might induce me to projectile vomiting.

Why should I, when I've already consumed such cultural delicacies as balut, 1,000 year old eggs, and kimchi? And don't even get me started on "grog."

I'll stick with foods that smell good, or look good, or taste good, thanks.

Positive Protests

Tuesday, April 13, 2010
As I noted last week, the freeze-dried whackaloons of the Westboro Baptist Church are coming to Denver later in the month, and local groups are mobilizing to counter-protest their hateful activities.

I've decided to join the counter-protests on Saturday, and make it positive experience.

I've ordered this T-Shirt for the occasion:


It made me smile, and seemed positive and upbeat.

I've alse decided on my sign, although I haven't actually made it yet. It's going to say, "Navy Vet - Proud to Defend Your Freedom!" Again, positive and upbeat, and it has the added advantage of being something I believe in strongly.

I promise to keep my temper in check, and I won't punch anyone in the throat. But I will be warming up my voice. Once upon a time, many, many years ago, I was a cadence caller. I knew that skill would come in handy one day...

This is Made of WIN

Monday, April 12, 2010

Shamelessly stolen from the Rational Crank. A list of attendees can be found at the link.

HEE!

Out of Pocket, Out of My Mind

I'm going to be a bit scarce around here for the next couple of weeks. I have two week-long events for which I need to leave the house and be around other people. I know - SHOCKING.

This week I'm at a technical conference (Hey! Look, Ma! No Pantyhose!), where I'll be learning new and exciting stuff about the technology I use in customer proposals. I've tried attending these conferences remotely in the past, and I find that I can always find something else to do* rather than attending the sessions, so I'm going to one of our R&D facilities to attend this time. I'm hoping that since I'm making the effort to be there in person, I'll be a bit more focused and get more out of it.

Next week I'll be attending another technical conference, but it's one that's for and about customers. I have a number of customers attending, so I'm basically going to support them and try and drum up some excitement about our new technologies and products. I have to wear pantyhose for that one, darn it.

After two weeks of leaving the house every day, I suspect I may lose my mind. Yes, yes, I know - I'm a spoiled, spoiled engineer, complaining about the fabulousness of my professional life, and it makes you want to punch me in the throat. Just giving fair warning, so if I appear on anyone's blog drooling and writing in a Palinesque way, I want you all to know there are the mitigating circumstances. We'll return to our regularly scheduled programming in a couple of weeks.


*Work related tasks, not playing with Boogie Dog or watching You-Tube. I've been a virtual worker for many, many years, and the discipline required for this lifestyle is second nature to me now.

I Gots Me Some Culture

Sunday, April 11, 2010
As a former choir singer, I really enjoy choral music. I especially enjoy choral music when the choir is accompanied by a full orchestra and well-trained soloists.

Which is why it's a "plus" for me that my Hot Mom participates in (and sits on the board of) The Longmont Chorale. It gives me an excuse to drive up to Longmont for her performances, and last night, her group did a joint performance of Verdi's Requiem, joining the Longmont Symphony Orchestra and the Colorado Mormon Chorale.

The performance was FABULOUS. The local groups all did a great job of supporting the paid soloists, the quality of which surprised me.


Great job to all who participated!

Counter-Protesting the WBC, Wingnuts Extraordinaire

Saturday, April 10, 2010
I've never protested anything before. Yes, I know - I'm a big slacker.

But the Westboro Baptist Church will be sullying my fair city on April 22-24th, and if there's a group that's capable of incenting me to actually leave my house and be around other people, they're it. Unfortunately, I have professional obligations on the 22nd and 23rd, so I won't be able to counter protest on those days, but on the 24th, there are ample opportunities to stand up and be counted at one or more of these locations:

- 8:30 to 9:00 AM ~ Temple Sinai, 3509 S. Glencoe St. Denver
- 10:00to 10:30AM ~ Temple Emmanuel, 51 Grape St. Denver
- 1:00 to 1:30 PM ~ Jewish Community Center, 350 S. Dahlia St. Denver
- 5:00 to 6:00 PM ~ EXDO Event Center, 1399 35th St. Denver


I am seriously considering this event, but I do have some doubts. There's a part of me that thinks a counter-demonstration is legitimizing these fucknuts, and if there's anything in the world I'm not interested in, it's legitimizing Fred Phelps and his merry band of whackadoos. And yet, the members of the Jewish communities who have been targeted for the 24th deserve to know the larger community supports them against the likes of the WBC. So I'm fence-sitting in true dithering style.

There's also the issue of my temper. I truly despise these motherfuckers, and although I'll be leaving the Shovel of Doom™ at home, I know myself well enough to know I'll be tempted to punch them in the throat just on general principle. Which would be problematic.

There's a Facebook Group dedicated to help organize people for the WBC's visit to Denver, and additional information may be found there, if any of my local readers are interested in participating.

But I'm still dithering. Is there value in counter-demonstration, when the demonstrators are so clearly off the rails?

Boogie Blogging Friday

Friday, April 9, 2010

Boogie's a tired boy today after spending the day chasing the Damn Squirrel™ away from the bird feeder. 

A dog's work is never done, and eternal vigilance is the price of freedom from vermin.

Don't Be a Dumbass

Thursday, April 8, 2010
You know, I don't know how many times I've had this conversation with people I've mentored, or led, or raised.

Learning how to communicate effectively, in writing, is an invaluable skill.

Typically, it doesn't matter how smart you are, how critically you think, how great your ideas are - if you can't communicate your ideas effectively using the written word, then it's unlikely people are going to take you seriously. Can't spell? Use poor grammar? Can't form a complete sentence? Then it's quite likely that people will assume you're uneducated, or stupid, or both.

This is not a conversation about what's "fair." You can justify your poor skills by giving examples of geniuses who may not have been able to write effectively, but here, in the real world, no one cares. No one will ever know about your fabulous/groundbreaking/innovative ideas if you can't communicate them to the world in an effective way. If you write poorly, people will just assume you're a dumbass, and be done with it.

I bring this up because in spite of the stereotype associated with engineering types, I am capable of writing effectively on a professional basis. My proposals are succinct and well-written, and I'm clear in my intent and my delivery. When I was in the Navy, I wrote the performance evaluations for every person above and below me in the chain of command for two levels. It helps that I like to write, of course - but it's not like my skills came with me, fully formed, from my father's brow. I had to work at it. Sometimes I get sloppy on my blog, but if I write something for which I'm being paid, you can bet it's clear and concise.

Nothing chaps my ass more than someone whose job title is supposed to include rudimentary writing skills who can't put a sentence together to save their damn life. I'm not talking about the ignorant trailer trash who leave nonsensical rants on the various extremist websites (although they're a sad, sorry lot, too). I'm talking about people who have a job that requires them to communicate effectively with others, in writing, who don't know that "a lot" is two words, or that "irregardless" isn't a real word. Seriously? Irregardless? Where did you take freshman English? Did you even pass freshman English?

Learning to write well, whether it's an e:mail, a proposal, or a technical explanation, is one of the ways quality people are differentiated from their more lackluster peers. Learn it, live it, love it. Or go work at Jiffy Lube, where no one gives a good gaddamn if you can write, or not.

Capice?

Who Cares? Magazine - Special Edition!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Tiger Woods returns to golf to play in the Masters! Will his wife be there? Will he drive his point home? Will the double entendres NEVER END? Who Cares!

Kids, Cancer and Being Bald

Tuesday, April 6, 2010
I absolutely cannot imagine a scenario that would freak me out more than having one of my children be diagnosed with some serious illness. I am incredibly lucky in this regard, that my kids made it to adulthood with only the usual bumps and bruises associated with growing up.

Apparently occasional commenter and long-time friend Juan Federico and his lovely wife Angela feel the same way, because they have formed a team supporting the charity St. Baldrick's, an organization that funds research grants, infrastructure grants, multi-institution grants, fellowships and scholars dedicated to finding cures for childhood cancers. The fund-raising gimmick is shaving your head bald if you meet your fund-raising goal (and I guess even in you don't), hence the name.

So, if you have a few extra charity bucks in your budget this month, head on over and support Team Gonzalez over at St. Baldrick's.

Good luck, guys. I look forward to the photos of both of you with your new "Mr. Clean" looks.

Westboro Baptist Church and The First Amendment

I'm no fan of Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church. Anyone who's read my blog for any length of time knows I think him and his entire congregation needs to die in a fire.

But that doesn't mean his Constitutional rights should be abrogated.

Because Jim Wright of Stonekettle Station has been lurking inside my head and stealing my blog ideas, I'm going to direct you over there for this topic. Jim pretty much speaks for me on this one.

I don't agree with Fred Phelps and his insane clown posse, but they have a Constitutional right to be hateful, horrifying fucksticks. Yes, even at a fallen service member's funeral.

____________

Another member of the infamous UCF has posted a thoughtful and thought provoking post on this case, including why it's not really about the First Amendment at all. Eric is an actual attorney, and so knows whereof he speaks, as opposed to yours truly, who typically just talks out of her ass. You can find Eric's post here.

"I'm a People Person!"

Monday, April 5, 2010
You know, I have NEVER understood what that means. A people person. Does it mean that you like people? That you like to be around people? That you have patience for the venal, the banal, and the stupid? That you think people are just SWELL? Or does it mean that you're an extrovert, someone who doesn't like to be alone?

Regardless of the definition used, I think it's safe to say that I'm not a "people person."

I don't "love people" in the generic sense. My stress reduction strategy requires that I spend time alone. Actually,  a lot of time. Crowds of people I don't know make me claustrophobic. Generically, I tend to think "people" are pretty unlikable - I find them venal, banal, or stupid. Or all three. Many people have bad manners, and I don't like to be around it. The worst part of my job is dealing with people that I consider to be unreasonable, unthoughtful, duplicitous or childish. Sometimes I'm so disgusted with the "evil that men do" I consider us all to be doomed.

Apparently, I'm just a bitchy curmudgeon, and I'll thank you to get off my lawn.

And yet...I enjoy my friends and my family.* I spend a significant amount of time caring for and doing for others, and I believe that doing so is a cornerstone of my life. I treasure my relationships with the people in my life, and I try to treat them with love and respect. There are aspects of the human condition that bring tears to my eyes, I'm so awed and impressed with what we've accomplished as a species. Occasionally I'm exposed to the kindness of strangers or some amazing piece of work, and I'm filled with hope.

I'm not sure how I can simultaneously hold the "people SUCK" and "people are SWELL" points of view, but there you have it. I think the former excludes me from the "people person" moniker, but I'm not completely without hope for our sorry selves. Regardless, I think it's fair to say that I'm eminently unqualified to ever work in "customer service," since being a "people person" is apparently required.

I find I can live with that.   

_____________________
*Within reason. We're not one of those families that lives in each others' pockets, needing to spend time together every day. Which pleases me, actually. You can't choose your family, and while I think I got pretty lucky in that department, that doesn't mean I want them underfoot every second of every day. I've also been told I'm a pretty low-maintenance friend, and I have to admit that I prefer low-maintenance friends myownself.

Happy Easter - Now with More Brainzz

Sunday, April 4, 2010
To my readers who follow the Christian faith, I wish you a Happy Easter.

To my secular readers, I invite you over for our annual Easter tradition - a screening of Dogma, and frozen pizza.


Hmm...brainzz!

Happy Anniversary

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Happy Anniversary, Smart Man. Twelve years, and we haven't killed each other yet, and you still make me laugh. 

I'll call that a "win." I love you!

My Other New Hobby

Friday, April 2, 2010
I'm back from Hobby Lobby, and I have decided that since I have a history of seafaring in a professional capacity, why not reflect that in my new hobby? After all, putting this together will give me access to The Greatest Seafaring Story of All Time, and we all know I could use more religiosity in my life.

What?

Psych!  In fact, I bought some basic jewelry making supplies, because watching the Awesome Jeri™ work on my big score in Seattle earlier this year has inspired me to give it a go myownself. I doubt I'll ever have the metalsmithing skillz that Jeri enjoys, but I thought I'd see if I like it. If you all are nice to me, I may even send you some samples of my labor.

My New Hobby


My new plan: I'm going to train him to set up on the front porch and strafe anyone who attempts to harsh my mallow. What? It could work...

Furlough

Thursday, April 1, 2010
fur-lough

[fur-loh] - noun

1. Military. a vacation or leave of absence granted to an enlisted person.
2. a usually temporary layoff from work: Many plant workers have been forced to go on furlough.
3. a temporary leave of absence authorized for a prisoner from a penitentiary.
I'm taking tomorrow off. I'm going to go get a massage. I'm going to go grocery shopping. I'm going to go peruse our local craft store (because clearly - I don't have enough hobbies). I may even eat dough-nuts for breakfast.

What I won't be doing is checking my work e:mail, answering my work phone, or logging on to my work network. Because of definition number two, you see.

I'll probably also use the long weekend to make an effort to release some of my stress and find a way to get my head right when it comes to my professional choices and situation. I'm tired of insomnia, grinding my teeth when I do sleep, and snapping at the Boogie Dog when he (understandably) asks for some attention when I'm having a bad day. Something's got to give, and it seems most unlikely that corporate America is going to be the one to do so.

So I either need to adjust my attitude or reconcile myself to an involuntary committal for lighting my hair on fire and running through our neighborhood naked.