Link Me Up, Scotty - Constitution and Bigotry Edition

Monday, August 31, 2015
A thoughtful essay on looking at the 2nd Amendment of the Constitution from a liberal point of view. While this article did not change my fundamental belief that the fetishization of firearms does not lead to a healthy society, it does help to articulate why I support the 2nd Amendment as a matter of principle.

H/T Hot Mom
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A practical guide to what to say and do when a loved one is experiencing intense grief. I cannot recommend this article enough.

H/T Sister Stacey
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A fascinating essay on the topic of "Polite White Supremacy (PWS)." There is so much more to racism in America than I knew (says the pasty white girl, unsurprisingly).
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As Big Box stores go, Target is my favorite. Here's one reason why.
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What do you do when you want to secede from the Union and no shows up? Slink off in the rain, apparently.

H/T Shipmate Jim
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Why hasn't this dipshit lost her job? No, really - if I refused to perform a necessary and legal task that was a cornerstone of my occupation, I would expect to be ditched lickity split. Oh, wait - this must be more of that "Christian persecution" I keep hearing so much about.

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Video of the Week: Librarians cover "Uptown Funk" with some literary references.





H/T Sister Kathy

Barbara Ann Comer, May 12, 1949 - August 22, 2015

Friday, August 28, 2015

Barb Comer was my Mother-in-Law - The Smart Man's Mom. She passed on August 22nd, and we had her memorial service yesterday, at the same Funeral Home where we had our daughter's service only two years ago.

I was privileged enough to be able to deliver her eulogy, even though I cried through most of it.

I love you, Barb.


Barb on the Alaskan Cruise we gave her for her 65th birthday. She said it was the best vacation she's ever had.




I’ve known Barb for 15 years. Not nearly as long as some of you, and not nearly long enough.

When I first became part of the family, Barb could not have been more gracious. She made sure I knew I was welcome, and never treated me with anything but the utmost kindness. Getting to know her and her story has been an amazing privilege. 

One of the things I admired about Barb was her incredible perseverance in raising Terry and Tom. She did so basically alone, and worked hard to ensure that even though they lived on the knife’s edge of poverty, her children knew that they were the most important thing in her life. She ensured each of their activities was attended by someone who loved them. She worked a second job so that they could afford to participate in music or soccer. Nothing was too great a sacrifice to ensure she raised happy, healthy adults, who were well-equipped to contribute to the society in which they lived, and pass on her ethos of hard work, self-sacrifice, and love. 

And what an amazing job she did. Her legacy lives on, in the form of Terry and Tom. They grew into fine men, with families.  Both of them exhibit the kind of generosity of spirit and love that she herself personified. Both are leaving a legacy of their own, in the people they care for and who care for them. Barb lives on in them, and in the love of her life, her granddaughter Lily. 

And Barb lives on in me. I know I’m a better person because I knew her. I’m more patient. I’m more kind. I have more empathy for those who don’t think the way I think, and more willingness to see value in what others’ value. And I’m grateful to her for changing me, and expanding my own circle of love.

If the measure of a life is taken by someone’s effect on others, then Barb was an eminently successful human being. She didn’t rock the world with her scientific or cultural accomplishments. She wasn’t famous, or even well-known. Instead she changed the lives of the people around her, one person at a time, making the world a little less mean, a little more kind. And being remembered for that is probably the best legacy of all.

Planned Parenthood and Hypocrisy

Saturday, August 22, 2015
Today I was driving down Parker Road and saw about a dozen protesters outside our local Planned Parenthood clinic, with the usual signs about "stop abortion" and "Defund Planned Parenthood."

The only problem, or course, is that our local clinic is not one of the Planned Parenthood clinics that perform abortions. Instead, they provide reproductive and sexual health care, and education about those issues to women and men who can't get those services anywhere else.

Additionally, Planned Parenthood uses NO federal monies to subsidize abortions, because that's the law.

While I believe that the issue of abortion is one of the true moral dilemmas of our time, what I don't understand is why so-called "right to life" activists want to deny the 2.7 million people who currently use PP services access to this type of healthcare. Because that's what Jesus would do? Not to speak for someone else's deity, but I'm pretty sure that whole "care for the poor and the sick" thing precludes denying someone else health care. Just sayin'.

What I haven't seen from these people is an actual plan to replace the services PP provides. The federal government does not subsidize abortion. Period. So what are you going to do about the other 2.7 million people who need this health care, Right to Lifers? Will you pick up the cost for their care moving forward out of your own pockets, or will you dump them on their asses with no other options, just like Jesus would do?

The hypocrisy, it burns.
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P.S. After I got home I made a charitable contribution to our local Planned Parenthood chapter, 97% of which will go toward providing health care to those who need it. 

P.P.S. Commenters will remain civil, or I will wield the Shovel of Doom™ with reckless abandon. I mean it, people - it's been a super shitty day, and I have no patience for idiocy, ad hominem attacks, or crappy arguments not based on science or moral philosophy. 

Link Me Up, Scotty - Life, Death, and Racism Edition

Tuesday, August 18, 2015
Most Medical Doctors die at home. Most everyone else does not. There's a reason for this, and it has a lot more to do with realistic expectations and saying "enough is enough" than the actual quality of medical care given in either case. Count me in for a peaceful home death, if I have the choice.
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Atheists weigh in on the "meaning of life." Yes.

H/T Brother Eric
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An open letter from a mom to two teen girls she met at the pool. Sometimes I backslide and tell those pesky kids to get off my lawn, and then I read something like this.

H/T Brother Seth
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A word on women's shoes. Preach it, sister. 

H/T Debbie the Librarian
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Why "Douchebag" is the perfect racial slur for whites.  I love that insult, and apply it liberally already (although I usually modify it to "douchecanoe."). I like this definition better.

H/T Sister Megan
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My quasi-celebrity platonic boyfriend Eric Gardener is at it again, this time with a new way to look at racism and its systemic effect on our society. I totally live within a racist system, and am the beneficiary of unearned privilege as a result. Am I sometimes a butthole about it? Almost certainly. Do I strive to do better every day and improve the system? You bet.
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Popehat is right on the money when it comes to the free pass given to law enforcement in this country. No one should be above scrutiny, I don't care how "noble" you think you are.
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24 Tattoos that symbolize people's struggle with mental illness. I'm considering another tattoo myself along these lines, but haven't made any decisions.  
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Video of the Week: Young Bailey Matthews finishes his first Triathlon. He's eight years old, and he has Cerebral Palsy.

Link Me Up, Scotty - Sexism, Toxicity and Suicide Edition

Monday, August 3, 2015
Some points to ponder regarding the legacy of Barack Obama's presidency. I personally love this President, even if I don't agree with every policy decision (*cough*drones*cough*). The dignity he brings to the office is unlike any President in my lifetime, and thankfully, history will judge his legacy, not Bill O'Reilly and his ilk.

H/T Terry R. 
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Toxic people suck, as in they suck the joy and peace from your life. Here's twelve strategies they use to accomplish that goal, and how you can be more emotionally stable without their input. All of these had bells ringing inside my head regarding people who have been in life (ding, ding, ding!)

H/T Rivi
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Boy Scouts of America finally lifts its ban against gay leaders. I suppose it's better late than never, but really - it's about fucking time.
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I totally need this type of obituary. Are you listening, Smart Man and Smart Sailor?
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This author found it interesting how many more people criticized his work when they thought he was a woman. And in other news, water is wet.

H/T Sister Stacey
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The numbers of female vets who take their own lives is far, far in excess of the general population. This bothers me on several levels for reasons that should be obvious, and I look forward to the day when I'm emotionally strong enough to try and help stem this epidemic.

H/T Brother Vince
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Transgender service members will no longer be discharged, and the Secretary of Defense has directed the Armed Forces to come up with appropriate policies to address the specific needs of trans people. Once again, the Armed Forces leads the way, and I couldn't be prouder of my old community.
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A suicide survivor with some timely advice on the language we use to describe the act of taking one's life. This has been bugging the shit out of me since Moe died, and I'm glad someone else feels the same way I do about it. No one "committed" a crime when Moe died. She died of mental illness, and is deserving of the same respect that a victim of cancer does. Both lost their fight, and neither one committed a crime. Language matters.