Grow, Janiece, Grow

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Count your blessings, you stabby bitch

I think the busier my life becomes, the more quickly I tend to go to a place where I'm not fully aware of just how fabulous my life is. When a plane is late, when I'm performing work and my colleagues do not meet my expectations, when I get poor customer service - these first world issues tend to overwhelm all the amazing and enviable aspects of my life and I get crankier and crankier.

This is not a recipe for living in joy.

For me, perspective is the key for this growth opportunity. Even if things aren't going as well as I hope, even if someone else's bad day is negatively impacting mine, that doesn't mean that ZOMG MY ENTIRE LIFE BLOWS. It means I'm in the middle of an unfortunate event, one that will almost certainly give me an opportunity to be a better person. I've been working on keeping this in my mind when things go wrong, and sometimes I even succeed.

Virtue unlocked: Perspective.

Shut up and listen

One of the things I've noticed about myself is that the more competent I feel in a specific situation, the smaller my tendency becomes to just shut the hell up and listen. I've noticed this specifically as it relates to my gig in the Military Industrial Complex - I'm learning many new technologies, and most of the folks on the calls and in the meetings I'm attending know more about what we're discussing than I do. Because I don't really consider my competence in this space to be equal to that of my peers, I tend to do a lot more listening rather than trying to put forth my own opinions and ideas.

This a good thing.

For one thing, it gives me a chance to learn about new technology from a variety of sources, whose understanding may differ from my own. For another, it helps me in my goal of understanding that I'm not the only competent person in the room. Actively listening to others gives me the chance to admire and respect them in their areas of expertise. And perhaps most importantly, it provides excellent practice in learning to value others, a Mr. Rogers-like virtue that has long been on my self-improvement list.

Virtue unlocked: Respect.

A slave to my ambition

I was having lunch with a friend the other day, and we were discussing how our professional ambitions have changed as we've gotten older. I'm no longer particularly interested in being THE VERY BEST SE ON THE PLANET, DON'T YOU THINK THAT I'M NOT. What I am interested in is being the very best SE I can be while still maintaining balance in my life, and providing good value for the compensation I receive. I can never do less than my best, but I no longer think my work needs to dominate and define my life.

I'm also more interested in my personal ambitions than in my professional ones, because working on the former will also provide benefits to the latter. My personal ambitions now include things like "Being a kind person," and "Living an authentic life," and "Being a good friend to those I care about." I think from the perspective of leaving this earth a better place than I found it, my personal ambitions are far more important than my professional ones.

Virtue unlocked: Balance.

1 comments:

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