On Being Offensive

Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Yesterday I went to the library. This is something I do on a fairly regular basis - I check out audio books and then listen to them on my iPod. Once I'm done, I delete the files from my hard drive.

Douglas County has an awesome library with an awesome Library Director. For such a conservative county, the library continues to support and espouse such liberal ideas as freedom of speech and privacy. Go, Douglas County Library.

Unfortunately, the patrons don't appear to have the same love for these ideals. How do I know? When I went to the library yesterday, I parked my Jeep in the "5 minute parking" space at the front of the library. I only needed to return The Brothers Karamazov and The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder, and the 5 minute parking space is right in front of the drop box. Since I was feeling crappy yesterday (and worse today, thankyouverymuch), I was all "Score!" when I saw the spot was empty. I left the engine running, and as I was returning from the drop box, I noticed a gentleman staring intently at the back of my Jeep, and then turning to give me the Very Hairy Eyeball. What was he staring at, you might ask? This:


Now I thought long and hard about putting this emblem on the back of my Jeep. I realize that it's offensive to some people. I realize that to a some people, it's very offensive. But after giving it a great deal of thought, I decided to go ahead.

The First Amendment of the Constitution gives me not only the right to worship (or not) as I see fit, it gives me the right to express my belief (or non-belief) as I see fit. If I want to express my non-belief using this emblem, and someone of faith is offended, then I have to be honest enough with myself to admit that I really don't care.

It took me awhile to come to this conclusion. I struggled with it, because I know a great many people who are decent, kind individuals, whose relationship with their faith is a cornerstone of their life and who they are. I didn't want to offend those people - after all, I counted them among my friends and family, and I didn't want them to construe this decision as a personal attack. It was about me, not about them, if you know what I mean, and those who know me reasonably well know that's true.

But here's the thing - while I personally consider religious belief to be an incredibly private matter, I'm apparently in the minority. Everywhere I look, I see symbolism of other people's religious belief - T-shirts, jewelry, houses of worship, bumper stickers, emblems, books, magazines, music, stores, TELEVANGELISTS. And some of those things offend me. Some of them offend me a lot. And that's okay. It's okay for me to be offended, because those people who choose to "wear their faith on their sleeve" have the right to do so, and I don't have the right to ask them to stop.

The Constitution does not guarantee anyone's right "not to be offended." Not mine, and not yours.

I chose to put that emblem on my car because it's my right to do so. It depicts my non-belief in what I consider to be a humorous way. Unless I know you personally and also care about your good opinion of me (a pretty small subset), I don't care that you're offended. Most people who choose to display symbols of their religiosity apparently don't care that it may offend me - nor should they. You don't like it? I expect you'll get over it. Or you won't. Either way, my right is protected by the Constitution - and so is yours.
_________________

Written in support of Blasphemy Day.

The Creeping Crud

Tuesday, September 29, 2009
I'm feeling a bit under the weather today. The Smart Boy brought home the creeping crud from college, and now I'm achy, tired, and I have a sore throat*.

I've decided to skip the elliptical today in an effort not to push my body when it so obviously needs some rest, but I won't be taking any sick time unless I start feeling really crappy. That's one of the dangers of working from home full time - since I don't actually have to leave the house in order to be productive, and the only people I'm going to infect with my nasty germs is those who would be infected anyway, I don't feel right "calling in sick." Stupid overdeveloped sense of responsibility. Thanks a lot, Hot Mom.


*The first one who suggests an alt-med therapy to alleviate my symptoms is getting a shovel to the head. I don't have the patience today to deal with logical fallacies, unsubstantiated claims and other forms of teh stoopid.

I Read Banned Books

Monday, September 28, 2009
WHEREAS, the freedom to read is essential to our democracy, and reading is among our greatest freedoms; and

WHEREAS, privacy is essential to the exercise of that freedom, and the right to privacy is the right to open inquiry without having the subject of one’s interest examined or scrutinized by others; and

WHEREAS, the freedom to read is protected by our Constitution; and

WHEREAS some individuals, groups, and public authorities work to remove or limit access to reading materials, to censor content in schools, to label “controversial” views, to distribute lists of “objectionable” books or authors, and to purge libraries of materials reflecting the diversity of society; and

WHEREAS, both governmental intimidation and the fear of censorship cause authors who seek to avoid controversy to practice self-censorship, thus limiting our access to new ideas; and

WHEREAS, every silencing of a heresy, every enforcement of an orthodoxy, diminishes the toughness and resilience of American society and leaves it less able to deal with controversy and difference; and

WHEREAS, Americans still favor free enterprise in ideas and expression, and can be trusted to exercise critical judgment, to recognize propaganda and misinformation, and to make their own decisions about what they read and believe, and to exercise the responsibilities that accompany this freedom; and

WHEREAS, intellectual freedom is essential to the preservation of a free society and a creative culture; and

WHEREAS, conformity limits the range and variety of inquiry and expression on which our democracy and our culture depend; and

WHEREAS, the American Library Association’s Banned Books Week: Celebrating the Freedom to Read is observed during the last week of September each year as a reminder to Americans not to take their precious freedom for granted; and

WHEREAS, Banned Books Week celebrates the freedom to choose or the freedom to express one’s opinion even if that opinion might be considered unorthodox or unpopular and stresses the importance of ensuring the availability of those unorthodox or unpopular viewpoints to all who wish to read them; now, therefore, be it

RESOLVED, that the Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men blog celebrates the American Library Association’s Banned Books Week, September 26-October 3, 2009, and be it further

RESOLVED, that Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men encourages all libraries and bookstores to acquire and make available materials representative of all the people in our society; and be it further

RESOLVED, that Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men proprietress Janiece Murphy, will wear her "Banned Books" bracelet to commemorate this historical week; and be it further

RESOLVED, that Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men and its proprietress, Janiece Murphy, encourage free people to read freely, now and forever.

September 28, 2009
Parker, CO

Top 100 most frequently Banned or Challenged Classics
I challenge you to read one - or more - this week!

Lifted pretty much whole cloth from Jeri over at Smug Puppies, my sister-in-reading Banned Books.

'Tard of the Week - John Edwards

You know, I've never been a huge fan of John Edwards. When he was trying to secure the Democratic nomination for the 2008 election, I did look at his policy platform, and decided that Barack Obama was a better candidate for me as a voter. I tried very hard to make my decision based on their policies, as I always do, but on a personal level, I have to admit that I've always thought John Edwards was a bit...smarmy.

Since the guy's an attorney and a politician, this really isn't that surprising, I suppose. While he never fell into the "ambulance chaser" category in my mind, when his $400.00 haircuts and infidelities came to light I really was not all that surprised, although I did have a lot of sympathy for Elizabeth and their children.

Now make no mistake - I don't give a good goddamn about his relationship with that woman. Who he sleeps with is between him and his wife. I don't give a shit about whether or not Ms. Hunter's daughter was sired by John Edwards, Andrew Young, or is the result of some weird cloning experiment. Because it's not my business, you see.

What I do think is that for someone who is so obviously a bright individual, John Edwards has made a series of bad choices that places him firmly in the "'tard" category.

Choosing to have an extramarital affair when you are running for national office = dumb. Choosing to do so without adequate birth control = dumber. Choosing to keep your mistress' conduct in check by promising to marry her in some fabulous ceremony with the Dave Matthews Band providing the tunes after your terminally ill wife kicks the bucket = dumber than a box of hammers and possibly the most classless thing I've ever heard. Choosing to convince one of your aides to take parental responsibility when you're busted by the National Enquirer = dude, seriously? What the fuck?

To be fair, we really don't know what the real story is. Mr. Edwards continues to deny that Ms. Hunter's child is his. The rumor and innuendo is running rampant across the Internet.

But seriously. Dude - what the fuck?

How the mighty have fallen.

What You Get When You Argue with the Crazies - a Lesson

Sunday, September 27, 2009

2009 Flower Pr0n - Almost Done Edition



I don't have much left in the way of Flower Pr0n here at the Big Yellow House, so this will probably be the last installment for 2009.

Hmm...gourds.

Enjoy!

Everybody Needs a Goad

Saturday, September 26, 2009
So I was chatting on IM with Hot Chick Jeri yesterday, and she was congratulating me on my success with Weight Watchers. We were talking about how it's important to set reasonable goals in our health and weight loss efforts, except my mad typing skillz made my comment come out "That sounds like a reasonable goad."

Well.

Since we both like to laugh, we of course started to describe how "everybody needs a goad" and then describing our "goads." I won't share Jeri's goad, but I'll share mine. It's this dress:


This is a Ralph Lauren, and I haven't been able to wear it in some time. It's hard to see what it actually looks like on the hanger, so here it is the last time I was able to wear it:


This is one awesome dress, and I can't wait to wear it again. ROWWR.

Boogie Blogging Friday (or the Anti-Shrill Effect)

Friday, September 25, 2009
Today I'm taking a cue from my celebrity boyfriend The Bad Astronomer. I've been feeling a bit shrill and stabby lately, and that simply won't do. For one thing, my job is fixing to get a lot more stressful, and I don't want to give myself high blood pressure from the combination of a high stress profession along with the the stress of pointing and laughing at the assheads and the wackadoodles. Who needs that crap? Not me.

So instead of ranting and raving, today you get...photos of the Incomparable Boogie™!

Nobody can relax like the Incomparable Boogie™. Here he is, wishing those loud-ass boys who play outside our front window would just pipe down. Can't they see he's trying to power nap?


'Tard of the Week - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

Thursday, September 24, 2009
"[The Holocaust is a] lie and a mythical claim."

"Why should everyone be forced to accept the opinion of just a few on a historic event?"
Could this guy be a bigger douchebag? No, seriously - could he be a bigger dick?

From the link:
In the interview, he complained that the event is given too much prominence...
Because really, the horrifying deaths of 6 million innocent people should really just be a footnote in he history books. Don't you think?

Now I have to be honest, here - sometimes I look askance at the Israel leadership team when they make policy decisions regarding the Palestinians - just like I look askance at the Palestinians when they don't know how to act. You could say I believe in equal opportunity when it comes to accountability for bad behavior.

But this fucking guy...this fucking guy is beyond the pale. I actually wonder if he believes his own bullshit, or if he says such outrageous things in order to appeal to the wackier sectors of his constituency. Either way, I'm almost tempted to incur the wrath of my friend Karma and hope he dies in a fire. Almost.

Chamber of Surprises

So yesterday I went over to the Drivers License office to get a new license. The photo on my old one is eight years old, and does not resemble my current state of hotness.

I was expecting a Chamber of Horrors, as DMV offices are notorious for having rude and disinterested employees, and clients that should probably be tested for biosafety level 3 contagions before they're allowed in the door.

Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit, I was quite surprised with my experience. I don't know if it was time of day when I arrived (1:20 p.m.), the fact that my request was fairly simple (early renewal with no violations), or that the DMV has finally pulled their head out of their collective ass, but I was in and out of there in less than 30 minutes.

That's right, Hot Chicks and Smart Men - 30 minutes. The employees were friendly and gracious, and the entire affair was painless.

The other folks waiting to be served were a also a reasonable cross-section of humanity*, and it did not appear that any of them were contagious, had egregious criminal records, or needed a seminar in basic hygiene.

So congratulations to the Parker branch of Colorado Department of Revenue, Driver's License division. Well done!


*Except for Mr. Vanilla Ice sitting at the end of my row. Seriously, dude - you're a white guy living in Douglas County, red county of white privilege. You're not black, so pull up your pants and quit embarrassing yourself. Jeez.

Chamber of Horrors

Wednesday, September 23, 2009
I'm taking my last vacation day for fiscal year 2009 today. This morning I'm going to be joining the Longmont Senior Center's knitting group. They're the organization that accepts my charitable knitting for distribution among Adopt-a-Family, Head Start, and the VA hospital.

They're nice ladies, and I try to get up there a couple times a year.

But this afternoon...this afternoon.

This afternoon I have to go visit that freaky horror show, the Colorado DMV. The photo on my driver's license doesn't look a thing like me now that I've gone au naturale with my Hot Hair, and I'm afraid it's only a matter of time before the TSA pulls me aside for some "special counseling."

I'm sure the experience will give me plenty write about, a la Jim Wright's Things That Chap My Ass. Although the title may be, Things That Make Me Run Screaming Into the Night in Search of High Powered Weapons.

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more!

Talkin' 'Bout Changes

Tuesday, September 22, 2009
There's some professional news here at Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men - I'll be changing positions at my company effective October 1st.

Right now I'm what's called an "inside engineer." That means I provide behind-the-scenes design support to field teams who are proposing specific solutions for customers. Since I don't spend time with customers, I rarely leave my house for work related tasks, and I don't think I even own a pair of pantyhose.

The problem with my current job, however, is that it can be done by any qualified engineer, and engineers that live and work outside the United States are a hell of a lot less expensive to employ than yours truly. So I decided to be a bit preemptive, and I've been looking for other employment opportunities within my company for the last year. I didn't want to change companies if I didn't have to - I like where I work. It pays well, the benefits are excellent and the culture is better than most telecommunications companies. And last month a Field SE job came open; I applied, interviewed, and was offered the job. Yay, me.

What this means in the short term is that I have some new things I need to learn in the next few months. The skill set used by Field SE's is slightly different from the skill set used by inside SE's, and I've been out of the field for a number of years. I'm also going to have to go through my closet and find clothes to wear that don't include bedroom slippers, T-shirts and shorts.

In the long term, this means I probably won't have as much time to hang around on-line, as this position is liable to be more demanding in terms of time. I still intend to maintain my blog, of course, but I may be scarcer in other on-line communities than I have been in the past. This new job also means my future employment is more secure, and with the Smart Twins being all college-y these days, that would be the point of the exercise.

So I'm going to be going through some changes for the remainder of the year, and my content may well suffer. I'll apologize ahead of time, and hope that you all will forgive me until I reach a new equilibrium with my new responsibilities.

I <3 The Scientific Method

Monday, September 21, 2009
Modified 9/22/2009 9:26 a.m.

Here is a link to an analysis of the study linked below supposedly proving the efficacy of an alt-med treatment for Melanoma. Not to be crass, but it appears it's the UCF FTW!

******************************

I love the Scientific Method.

At my University, there is a course on the Scientific Method that all BA students are required to take in order to get their degree. Since my major is Science and Technology, the Scientific Method has permeated all of my core classes, and informs all my academic writing.

I started thinking about this yesterday after a completely unproductive exchange with some proponents of "alt med." The proponents kept saying things like
Modern medicine does not work.
Evidently small pox vaccinations, penicillin and anti-viral medication (all products of the scientific method) are all epic fails.

and
The only evidence we should ever need is the efficacy of the protocol you are undertaking in the cure of life-threatening diseases and if that works in practice and results in normal longevity...
The "It worked for me!" methodology of diagnoses and treatment.

and
I am referring to actual, tangible and successful results which have no need for the "scientific method" as you call it.
Because I evidently pulled the "scientific method" out of my ass to serve my nefarious purposes.

Putting the snarkiness aside for the moment, what I parsed from this exchange was that alt-med proponents believe their modalities work because they either had a personal experience where they were "cured" by them, or they heard about someone who was "cured" by them. My repeated, ever-more-shrill requests for actual clinical trials using the scientific method were met with accusations of being kept down by the "Man," the "Man" in this case being Big Pharma and the Medical Industrial Complex.

Finally I was directed to this, a retrospective meta-analysis. There was no control group, no double-blind, no randomization of participants.* I'm not a doctor, but I do understand the scientific method, and this is not a clinical trial or a well constructed study. What I will concede is that the information was interesting enough to me as a layman that I think further study by qualified professionals wouldn't be uncalled for.

Here's the thing that these folks don't seem to understand. In science, anecdotes are the beginning of the process, not the end. Say a doctor comes up with a new therapy:
...salt and water management, restricting sodium and supplementing potassium. It provides oral hyperalimentation of nutrients, while forcing fluids, by hourly administration of raw vegetable and fruit juices. Caloric utilization rates are enhanced through thyroid administration, while caloric content of the diet is limited (2,600 - 3,200 cal/day) by a very low fat, lactovegetarian diet. Protein is temporarily restricted. Coffee enemas are administered pro re nata (as frequently as every 4 hours) to improve nutrition, and to relieve pain.
And say this doctor reports that this therapy cures melanoma. This is big news, right? Melanoma kills people, and healers are interested in preventing that outcome, right? There's no earthly reason that this therapy shouldn't be in wide-spread use, provided the proponents can prove their claims in a repeatable way. And here's the rub: proof is required. Proof in the form of a clinical trial of their treatment, using standard clinical trial construction (i.e., randomized, controlled, double blind). If the results indicate the therapy works, then hurray! A new treatment for melanoma is born, and survival rates go up. Sweet vindication!

What you don't get to do is claim that your coffee enemas improve nutrition and relieve pain, and provide only anecdotal "evidence." Because that's not how science works. If you want to be taken seriously by scientists, then you have have to actually, you know, do some science.

The scientific method is not "outdated;" it's not "irrelevant." It's simply a process. A process that works especially well in empirical disciplines such as medicine, and guards against such common problems as confirmation bias. The scientific method helps us to determine the truth of factual claims such as whether or not the Gerson therapy reviewed in the link actually works. The "rules" of science apply to every discipline, and acting like you're in some way persecuted because you're held to the same standard as everyone else only exposes the weakness in your argument.

You see, assuming that it "works" based on the stories of a few individuals, with no clinical trial or controls, introduces all sorts of logical biases and fallacies into the process. As described by Michael Shermer in Why People Believe Weird Things:
Stories about how your Aunt Mary's cancer was cured by watching Marx brothers movies or taking a liver extract from castrated chickens are meaningless. The cancer might have gone into remission on its own, which some cancers do; or it might have been misdiagnosed; or, or, or...What we need are controlled experiments, not anecdotes. We need 100 subjects with cancer, all properly diagnosed and matched. Then we need 25 of the subjects to watch Marx brothers movies, 25 to watch Alfred Hitchcock movies, 25 to watch the news, and 25 to watch nothing. Then we need to deduct the average rate of remission for this type of cancer and then analyze the data for statistically significant differences between the groups. If there are statistically significant differences, we better get confirmation from other scientists who have conducted their own experiments separate from ours before we hold a press conference to announce the cure for cancer.
The alt-med crowd seems to want to go straight from "Aunt Mary cured her cancer by watching Marx brothers movies" to "hold a press conference to announce the cure for cancer."

I'm not against alt-med on the face of it. I don't think modern medicine has all the answers, or has a corner on the truth. But I believe in the process. While you might be able to make a case that the industrial medical complex has a vested interest in discrediting alt-med, you can't make the same claim about the scientific method. It is utterly and completely impartial. There is nothing to prevent alt-med proponents from embracing the scientific method as a tool to proving the efficacy of their claims. They simply choose not to, for reasons of their own. And until they do, it's unlikely that they'll be taken seriously by anyone in the mainstream.


*Please note that I make no claims and give no opinions about the efficacy of the therapy detailed in the link - I'm not a doctor, and I don't know enough about physiology, cell biology or oncology to have an informed opinion. I'd be interested in the opinion of those regular readers who have related experience or education.

ZOMGitsCriss Video

Sunday, September 20, 2009
I swear, the crazies are coming out of the woodwork lately. Shit I haven't looked at or thought about in months is suddenly hot stuff on certain Google searches. No accounting for taste, I guess. So what will I do this fine Sunday morning? Stir it with a stick AGAIN. Hehe.

So it appears that Ray Comfort, our favorite Young Earth Creationist and his personal butt-monkey Kirk Cameron will be "donating" copies of Darwin's Origin of Species at colleges and universities in November. Why, you may ask? Well, so they can include Comfort's "introduction" to the book, which supposedly "debunks" evolution. Since Comfort is such an expert and all.

::eye roll::

Well, it turns out that one of my favorite YouTubers, ZOMGitsCriss, has a few things to say about Mr. Comfort's plan, and the moronic Kirk's endorsement of same. Enjoy!

Argh! Pass the Grog, Matey! I've Reached a Goal!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Argh! It's annual Talk Like a Pirate Day, and I've taken on my Pirate persona, that of the lusty wench Jenny Kidd, and I'm here to give ye the news!

Ahem. I feel like The Albino describing the Pit of Despair.

Today I reached a significant goal in my Weight Watchers journey.
I've lost 10% of my body weight, which translates into significant health benefits such as lower cholesterol and blood pressure and a reduced risk of developing type 2 diabetes. As a token of my accomplishment, I was given this cool 10% key chain to commemorate the occasion. As my leader says, "Ooo! Ahh! Fabulous!"

The next step is supposed to be for me to set my final weight goal. I set that goal some time ago, however, so instead I'll be setting my next short term goal. I think the 10% goal is as good as any, so my next goal will be an additional 10% of my original weight. I'm on track with my goal of losing 65 pounds in a year, so I'm feeling pretty good today.

Go, me.

Boogie Blogging Friday Featuring Loki and Jynx

Friday, September 18, 2009
When we were visiting my Smart BIL and Hot SIL in Bawlmer last week, we were also visiting their dogs, Jynx and Loki.

This is Jynx. She's a bit willful, being a Jack Russell and all, and has a stiff legged way of prancing around the house that made me joke that she's secretly a member of Hitler's Youth. Which kind of goes along with the willfulness, in a way. Jynx, the jack-booted terrier.

This is Loki. He's still pretty young - just over a year. He's just the sweetest mutt, but he lacks...focus. For example, I was throwing his ball for him outside, and he was chasing it - until one of those white moths flew across his field of vision mid-stride. Then he followed the moth. Ooo! Look! Shiny!


Doggies!

Racism and the Tea-Baggers...er...the Tea Party Patriots

Thursday, September 17, 2009
A conversation with the Smart Boy gave me some food for thought today. That's not unusual - our conversations vacillate between me wanting to shake him until his teeth rattle because (like most teens) he sometimes takes positions at face value if he respects the speaker* and bursting with pride that I spawned such a Smarty Pants.

In this case, we were discussing whether or not the 9/12 demonstration was inspired primarily by the racism of the participants, or by a desire to stand up as a member of the loyal opposition.

Since I believe most of those people are ill-informed, uneducated, stupid and just plain WACKY, you can imagine where my point of view lay. While I would not contend that everyone involved in the "movement" are racists (such generalizations signify sloppy thinking), I tend to believe that in the specific case of the Tea Baggers...er...the Tea Party Patriots...one of the primary motives is racism. Prompted by the idiocies spewing from the mouths of Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh, these folks are giving into their fear. I think their fear centers around the idea that somehow they're entitled to their white privilege, and that our President, being a BLACK MAN and all, is intent of taking it away and replacing it with a more egalitarian system.

While I think that the base assertion is true - i.e., I believe white privilege is on its way out in the country, and I think President Obama believes that's the correct course of action - I don't buy that President Obama, or La Raza, or the Southern Poverty Law Center are racists for pushing that agenda. People are not entitled to their unearned privilege. Taking it away doesn't mean you're oppressed, it doesn't mean anyone's out to get you and yours. It means that everyone should be on a level playing field. I'm not Pollyanna enough to believe we'll ever live in a world where unearned privilege is eliminated, but I think it's a worthy goal.

The Smart Boy, being a child of every kind of unearned privilege you can think of, doesn't see the world in this way. I don't necessarily blame him - he's very young, he's never been anywhere, and his experience lacks exposure to the harsh realities of life outside of his red county existence. So when he looks at the Tea Baggers...er...the Tea Party Patriots...he doesn't see action born of a fear of change. He sees people of good conscience, who have valid concerns about the direction our country is heading.

The Smart Boy, while allowing that some Tea Baggers...er...Tea Party Patriots...might be motivated by racism, believes that doesn't negate their point of view, or invalidate their ideas. And this is where we parted ways.

To me, if you are mentally incapable of recognizing your bigotry for what it is, either because you lack the insight into your own psyche or you can't control your emotional knee jerk reactions to those who are different, then why the fuck should I give a good goddamn about anything you say? It taints everything about you, and informs every opinion you have. So if you actually have a defensible position, you will have to work a great deal harder than a person who doesn't have their head firmly up their ass to convince me you have a point. Context matters to me, and if a racist fuckstick wants to bitch about the President's economic plan, I have no time or interest in their rantings.

The Smart Boy disagrees. To him, it's the idea that's the thing, and if someone has an idea that he believes has merit, then their ability (or inability) to think rationally on another topic is beside the point. He believes the correct thing to do is to judge the idea in a vacuum, where the racist asshead's other activities have no bearing.

I know that some of these people's concerns (like the cost of universal health care and the deficit) are legitimate, and deserve discussion. I have similar concerns, being a balanced budget kind of gal myownself. But I simply can't take these people seriously. Their underlying fear (not to mention their illiteracy and inability to express themselves in any kind of mature and meaningful way) makes me dismissive of them.

I realize I'm a bit stabby on this subject. It's hard for me to be objective, and that's why our conversation gave me food for thought. Am I wrong to dismiss the racist assholes and their ideas out of hand? Or does inviting them to the table of reasonable discourse empower their hateful ideas?


*This typically happens when the "speaker" is his father. Since his father is a tea bagger...er...Tea Party Patriot...you can imagine how DELIGHTED I am when I hear the Smart Boy channeling him.

_______________

Updated 9/18/2009 11:37 a.m. Please link over to Eric's blog for a really excellent essay
on how certain opponents of the President are even more blatantly racist than I thought, given the context of Southern politics and culture. Thanks for your thoughts, Eric.

Chock Full of Crazy

Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Today is just chock full of the crazy. First of all, I'm participating in "#crazyday" over on Twitter, where my tweets have consisted of:

Just returned from the dentist's office, where he removed my teeth through my nose. #crazyday

Now using the rack as my exercise machine. I feel taller already! #crazyday

I've decided to sniff Play-Doh in lieu of drinking during the work day. #crazyday

Simple Green is PEOPLE! #crazyday
In addition, I really did go to the dentist this morning, and now my teeth are extremely cold sensitive, and my back feels like someone's been kicking me in the kidneys with pointy shoes. Yeah, I know - thems the breaks, you whiny ass.

And to add insult to injury? The EBOLA is back in my life. With a vengeance.

Is it tomorrow, yet?

How about now?

They Want My Body

Tuesday, September 15, 2009
I've been listening to an audio book called Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers, by Mary Roach. From the author's website:
For 2,000 years, cadavers -- some willingly, some unwittingly -- have been involved in science's boldest strides and weirdest undertakings. Stiff is an oddly compelling, often hilarious exploration of the strange lives of our bodies postmortem.
I have been THOROUGHLY enjoying this book. The author approaches the subject with gentle humor, and gives detailed accounts of what actually happens to bodies that are donated to science, covering forensic science, anatomy, surgery practice, transportation safety tests, body armor design, organ donation and more.

I have long wanted to donate my body to science once I'm done with it, and Ms. Roach's graphic descriptions of what actually occurs ("segmentation and disarticulation,” anyone?) has actually reinforced this desire. Yes, I'm a bit strange, but the things science and engineering can learn about how to better serve our human bodies through work with cadavers is simply amazing. I've always been an organ donor, and that is still my first choice for my body once I'm done with it. I can't imagine a better use for my pieces and parts than to extend the life of someone else.

But if they're not usable due to age or disease, I'm totally doing the next best thing - donating the whole kit and kaboodle to whomever it will serve. Gross anatomy lab, surgical practice, crash test dummy - whatever's needed. The idea that my "earthly remains" will be used to possibly extend the life or protect the body of someone else, or to train someone to do the same, gives me that warm and fuzzy feeling. Go, cadaver!

I've found several organizations who will handle the donation (including returning partial cremains to my family if they wish) at no cost to my estate, which is pretty cool. I want to get all the paperwork done prior to my death - that way my Smart Family don't have to deal with any of it, and my wishes are on record. That's a double win, as far as I'm concerned.

Back from Bawlmore

Monday, September 14, 2009
So we spent the last week visiting my Smart BIL and Hot SIL outside of Baltimore, Maryland. We had a great time, and I promised a follow-up post now that we've returned and I again have access to the micro-USB cable that allows me to transfer photos from my camera. Yes, I did leave it at home, thanks for asking. Feel free to shut up at any time.

We arrived on Saturday, and immediately went to our hosts' favorite crab place for lunch. Hmm...crab cakes.

Sunday we went to the Steven F. Udvar-Hazy Center in Virginia. This is an annex of the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum, and contains items that actually require a hanger as opposed to being small enough to be housed in a museum, like this awesome Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird:



It also houses the Space Shuttle Enterprise. Beam me up, Scottie. No, really - beam me up, I want to go into space.



The full photo set for the Steven F. Udvar-Hazy Center and the Air & Space Museum in Washington DC, which we visited on Tuesday, can be found here.

Monday we walked around the National Mall and visited all the Memorials, where we ran into the gentlemen I wrote about here. One of the things I liked about the war memorials was the designers' success in being inclusive.




As a female vet, I appreciated that my sisters'-in-arms contributions were recognized.

I especially enjoyed the FDR memorial, who I believe is rolling over in his grave right about now.


The full photo set can be found here.

Wednesday we drove to Annapolis, the home of the U.S. Naval Academy.



This visit made me feel very strange. Prior to my leaving active duty, I had orders to the U.S. Naval Academy as a Company Commander. Instead of moving to Maryland, I chose to leave active duty and join the active reserves. While I don't regret my choice and I love my life, seeing the Academy turned my thoughts to "might have beens." Weird. Full photo set is here.

Thursday we met NeuronDoc and TheHusband for a sushi dinner, and they turned out to be as funny, smart and gracious as I'd thought.



Until the check came. Then there was trouble.



We compromised and let the Smart BIL and the Hot SIL pick up the tab.

Friday we went to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. I love Natural History Museums, so this was the one I was most looking forward to. For the most part, I wasn't disappointed. Their ocean hall was fabulous, and how can you not love pterodactyls?


But I do have to stick up for the home team and assert that the Denver Museum of Nature and Science does a better job with the art of dioramas, and our dinosaur exhibit is also superior.

While we were there, I picked out my Christmas gift from the Smart Man:



What?

Full photo set can be found here.

All in all, it was a great visit, and my Smart BIL and Hot SIL were extremely patient about shlepping us all over the place. I'm glad to be home, though, and Boogie was very happy to see us. While his soft Grandma took great care of him, she doesn't do walkies on demand, which is simply unacceptable.

2009 Flower Pr0n

Sunday, September 13, 2009
My Japanese Honeysuckle bloomed while we were gone. Boy, did it bloom.



The Pearl of Great Price

Saturday, September 12, 2009
I have a camera full of pictures, a tummy full of crab cakes, and memories of a really nice visit. I have the pearl of great price - family you'd actually like to know if you weren't related. My Smart BIL and Hot SIL are smart, funny, gracious and kind, and I'm glad to have gotten the chance to spend some more time with them.

There will be a recap (with selected photos) some time soon. But for now, I have pancakes to eat and a plane to catch. Stay out of trouble, Hot Chicks and Smart Men- and remember: Boogie and Hot Mom are on duty.

Remembering 9/11

Friday, September 11, 2009
Today is the 8th anniversary of the attacks of 9/11. A lot has changed since then. Some of it's good. Some of it's bad. All of it bears remembering.

Since 9/11, our Armed Forces have been in harm's way for longer than in any time in our history. Due to a combination of our all-volunteer military and the warrior culture that pervades it, the majority of this sacrifice is being borne by a very small percentage of our citizenry. I will remember my brothers and sisters-in-arms, and be thankful to them and their families for their willingness to serve.

Since 9/11, we have allowed our personal freedoms to be been eroded by a misguided and fearful government. Instigated by The Patriot Act, this erosion has continued, with no one to watch the watchers. I will remember there are worse things than living in uncertainty, and trading security for freedom is a bad deal.

Since 9/11, thousands of families have been without the loved ones who were lost either in the initial attacks or as members of the Armed Forces. I will remember those who have fallen, and provide support to their families where I can.

Since 9/11, we've slowly moved from the politics of fear to the politics of reason, but we still have a long way to go, and the fear-mongers will not give up without a fight. I will remember what happens when a society gives in to fear, and try to live with courage.

Since 9/11, it's become apparent just how close to the edge of civilization our society is when faced with what we perceive to be an outside threat. I will remember that stereotyping is the precursor to bigotry, and make every effort to purge it from my mind.

Since 9/11, it's also been apparent how generous Americans are when push comes to shove. I will remember to keep and value generosity in my life.

Since 9/11, it's clearer that the U.S. isn't the boss of the world, and instead would do well to show some humility and respect when dealing with other cultures. I will remember that while I'm glad I'm an American, there's no special virtue in it. Free men and women can be found in any society.

Since 9/11, it's obvious that some people's sense of right and wrong can be twisted to serve the evil agendas of the self-righteous. I will remember to guard against this, all the days of my life.

I will remember.

Conversations with Karma - Representative Joe Wilson

Thursday, September 10, 2009
::ring, ring::

Joe Wilson: Hello?

Karma: Joe Wilson, please. This is Karma.

JW: This is Joe, but I don't know any Karma.

K: Clearly. But we're going to get to know each other A LOT BETTER.

JW: I don't know what you mean. We Republicans only believe in the BABY JESUS.

K: Yeah, I know. But your lack of belief doesn't affect my reality. Funny how that works.

JW: What do you want?

K: I want what everyone wants. World peace. Health care for all. Basic civility in public discourse.

JW: Those things aren't part of the Republican platform.

K: I know. You guys might want to rethink those positions. Listen, I'm a busy, busy entity these days, so I'll get to the point. You know how you shouted out "You lie!" to the President during his speech on Wednesday evening?

JW: Of course! I was just showing the world that I'm a pure republican. Everyone knows that the President is a Kenyan born socialist who lies, and I was just PUTTING IT OUT THERE.

K: Um, yeah. I'm sure. It really was a complete breach of the social contract, you know. People expect their elected officials to show some decorum and respect, if not for the man who holds the office, then for the office.

JW: Respect is for Democrats. I'm a REPUBLICAN REPRESENTATIVE OF THE CONGRESS.

K: We'll see.

JW: What do you mean, "We'll see?" I was simply responding to my BASE.

K: I'm sure you were. The only problem is that people consider your manners to be the equivalent of those of a feral cat. Who was born and raised in a barn. People don't like that much.

JW: Well, I don't care what those GODLESS SOCIALIST DEMOCRATS THINK.

K: You should. People all over the country have contributed over $137K to your opponent in the 2010 election. A man named Rob Miller, who up till now no one had ever heard of. He was due for some good karma, evidently.

::cue crickets::

K: You still there, Joe?

JW: YOU LIE!

K: Not really. I don't ever have a reason to lie, you see. But you might.

JW: I'm calling Karl Rove! This is UNACCEPTABLE.

K: Tell Karl I'm thinking of him. A lot.

::click::

'Tard of the Week - Max Baucus

Poor Max Baucus. Here he is, trying to line his pockets by selling out health care reform to the for-profit health care industry, in the tradition of every elected representative since the dawn of democracy, and he's SURROUNDED BY IDIOTS.

You see, the senator from Montana heads up the Senate Finance Committee, and they're supposed to be drafting a health care reform plan. The only problem is that ole Max has accepted just a ton of money from the health care for profit lobbyists, and his "plan" is nothing short of handing the keys to the kingdom to his paymasters. The proof?

Prior to releasing his so-called "plan" to those for whom it's actually supposed to be written, i.e., the people of the United States and their elected officials, he sent a copy over to the K Street lobbyists whose profit driven interest is matched only by the lobbying money they spent to the get the plan they wanted.

But it gets better. Seems that Max's senior counsel, a woman named Liz Fowler, actually wrote the plan. There's nothing untoward about this, of course - Senators and Representatives have staff members for a reason, and simply can't write every single thing that comes out of their office theirownself. What's fishy is that Liz used to be a VP for Wellpoint, and during her tenure, this is what happened:
Blue Cross of California [parent company: Wellpoint] 'routinely' violated state law when it canceled individual health insurance coverage after policyholders got pregnant or sick, making no attempt to determine whether they did anything to merit such 'harsh' treatment, according to a state investigation of practices that appear to be industrywide.

State regulators plan similar investigations of other health plans in California, and the findings against Blue Cross ratchet up the risk of liability for other insurers, many of whom face lawsuits from consumers who claim they were illegally dumped and subjected to substantial hardships.

As a result of its unprecedented investigation, the Department of Managed Health Care on Thursday said that it had fined Blue Cross $1 million -- an amount immediately criticized by canceled policyholders and consumer advocates as too small to matter to an insurer whose parent company, WellPoint Inc., earned $3.1 billion in profit last year on revenue of $57 billion.
Yeah. So the plan that will supposedly cost us less and provide more care to more people was written by an insurance company stooge with a history of shady dealings, who wasn't even smart enough to cover her tracks before releasing it to her masters.

Max, you are a 'tard. You hire stupid people who do stupid things, and then try to convince the world that what you're doing is in your constituents' best interest. Of course, that's only true if your constituents are comprised solely of the for-profit health care industry.

At least you've left no doubt.


H/T to Bob Cesca

Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume XXV

Wednesday, September 9, 2009
This is Lynne Cox. A hero of Hot Chick Jeri's, she's a long distance open water swimmer who has taken her love of a sport and translated it into political activism.

She's made a variety of challenging and record breaking swims in her career, including the English Channel, Cook Straight, Catalina Channel and the Straight of Magellan.

Her most famous swim, however, was in 1987, where she was the first person to swim across the Bering Strait with a time of 2 hours and 6 minutes. The water was 40 degrees Fahrenheit, and she attempted the swim as a way to open the US/Soviet border for the first time in 48 years. Her accomplishment helped to ease Cold War tensions as Ronald Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachev both praised her success.

Additionally, she also completed a 1.6 mile swim in the waters of Antarctica.

Tough lady, and a good example.

Call Me When There's a Zombie Apocalypse

Tuesday, September 8, 2009
For the last week in August, the NRA called the Big Yellow House twice or three times a day, every day, looking for the Smart Man. Half the time there was no agent on the line when I answered (the result of a crappy automated dialer solution*), but I finally got an agent on about day five. She asked to speak to the Smart Man, and I told her she couldn't talk to him. Also - take us off your list, because we don't accept solicitation calls. Thank you! Click.

And they continued to call. And call. And call. The first day or two I let it go, because it sometimes takes some time for crappy automated dialer solutions to get "do not call" numbers updated in their database. The agents aren't responsible for this, and it's not their fault.

But I finally got sick of seeing them on my caller ID, and answered the phone. The agent asked to speak to the Smart Man, and I responded with, no, you can't speak to him, and I've already asked that you take us off your calling list. Her response? "I can update our records, but are you aware that this is the NRA?" (Emphasis hers). My response? "Uh, yeah. I can see it on my caller ID." Click.

Seriously? Did she honestly think that when I heard it was the NRA that I would say, "Oh, well. THAT's all right, then." Not fucking likely. Being a fan girl of the Constitution and all, I'm 100% in favor of people's rights to bear arms. But their lobbyists piss me the hell off, and I don't care for how they've subverted our political process for their narrow agenda. I'm all about a dose of common sense in my policy discussions, and as the Smart Man notes, no civilian needs an AK47 or an M60.

Until the Zombie Apocalypse, that is. THEN the NRA can call me.


*Why, yes - I do design automated dialer systems as part of my job. Just not the crappy ones. Please don't hate me.

A Memorable Thank You

Monday, September 7, 2009
We spent the day in our nation's capital, visiting all the war memorials and monuments. All of them were beautiful, well-maintained and people comported themselves in an appropriate and respectful manner. That last part surprised me, but in a good way.

In spite of how powerful the memorials were, for me the most profound moment of the day was when we saw an older gentlemen tooling around in his motorized chair. He was wearing his VFW uniform, which had the conflicts and areas where he served embroidered on his hat. A member of the 101st Airborne, he had served everywhere in the European theater with the exception of North Africa and Italy. If you've seen the HBO series Band of Brothers you have some idea of what this man's service entailed.

I approached him and took his hand, and simply told him that I was thankful for his service. He looked me right in the eye, said "you are most welcome," and pulled me in for a kiss on the cheek. For some reason this affected me deeply, and I started to cry a little.

I try to thank combat veterans whenever I see them and the opportunity presents itself. Reactions like his remind me that it's worth my time to do so.

Thoughts on Labor Day

I have to admit - I'm a bit old fashioned. When it comes to work, I have this idea that if someone agrees to pay me money to perform certain tasks, then I have an obligation to, you know, perform those tasks. And perform them without someone having to stand over me with a stick to ensure I do them correctly, or to make sure I'm not fucking off, or to make sure I'm not stealing from my employer.

On the other hand, I have had to supervise people who were not old fashioned in this way, and there is nothing more frustrating than having to chase after people to get them to do the work for which they're paid.

Except raising teens. That makes you want to take your own eye out with a fork.

So when Labor Day rolls around, I find myself on the horns of a moral dilemma.

On the one hand, I sympathize with the workers. There are many, many circumstances where companies will try and take advantage of their workers, up to and including lining their pockets on the backs and health of their employees. In such situations, workers are absolutely justified in unionizing and telling their collective bosses to fuck off in no uncertain terms if they can't provide decent wages and relatively safe working conditions for their workers.

On the other, I sympathize with the bosses. I've seen the so-called "work ethic" of some of these good-for-nothing SOBs, and sometimes the correct answer is to tell your worker to go play in traffic because their contribution to the company is in the negative column.

If you could trust employees to actually have a work ethic, and if you could trust companies to actually treat their employees fairly, then such disputes would be greatly reduced. Unfortunately, it seems like the only thing you can count on is that people are going to eventually behave in some foul way.

Cynical - who, me? Yeah. Happy Labor Day.

2009 Flower Pr0n, with Hot Bee on Flower Action

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Off to Bawlmore

Saturday, September 5, 2009
We're off today for the Baltimore/DC area for a week of visiting with family and friends. We're planning on hitting some of the memorials, as well as some museums while we're there, and of course, I'll be eating crab cakes.

Hmm...crab cakes.

The house will not be empty, however. My Hot Mom and the Smart Boy will be in and out, keeping an eye on things and making sure all is well in the Big Yellow House. So if you're a criminal, don't even think about stopping by. Or you shall be greeted with 95 pounds of this:


Don't say I didn't warn you.

Boogie Blogging Friday - Squirrel Hunting Edition

Friday, September 4, 2009

That squirrel is mocking me. It is evil, and must be destroyed.


I shall rest here underneath the maple tree. Eventually, the squirrel will come down, and I will teach it a lesson it shall not soon forget. Bwahaha.


So sleepy...

The squirrels in our neighborhood are in very little danger from Boogie, the Great Hunter of Parker.

Plan B

Thursday, September 3, 2009
The University called this morning - the Business Computer Applications class I was registered for has been canceled due to low enrollment. So I had to find another class to take. At first I thought I'd suck it up and take my last Communication Arts required course ("Discovering Creative Energies" ::snort::), but that class was full.

So instead I'm treating myself to another class in the Science and Technology catalog called "Breakthroughs in Science." Here's the description:
The last fifty years in science have produced amazing new discoveries and reorganized thinking in several basic fields. What are some of the most important scientific breakthroughs in recent times and what is the state of knowledge in those areas? This course provides opportunities to reflect on the future of scientific research. What are the most likely scientific discoveries in the next 25 to 50 years? What conceptual breakthroughs and new technologies will be needed to take scientific understanding and technological applications to the next level in selected fields? What are the likely implications for life in the years ahead? This course also addresses the issue of "Scientific taboo" - what science should or should not study and whether scientific and technological inquiry can be slowed down or stopped.

I was kind of saving this class as a reward for when I completed all the mandatory "common learning experiences" in my program, but it was the only class offered this semester in my degree plan that had room for me. As you can imagine, I'm really looking forward to it, as the course description implies an interesting and thought provoking curriculum. I'm really hoping we discuss nanotechnology, cyborgs and our new robotic overlords.

Of course, now I have to return my $198.23 textbook, since there's no guarantee the professor who ends up teaching the section of the Business Applications course will want that text. That's annoying, of course, but I'll get a full refund since the school canceled the class and I'll be returning it due to no fault of my own.

And in a complete non sequitur, here's a bug:

Something of Value

Wednesday, September 2, 2009
You know, I used to be a Republican. For many years I self-identified as such, although it might be safer to say I was a small "l" libertarian and social liberal.

Now? Not so much. My own personal ethical and moral journey really couldn't have led me anywhere else, but the reasons for my move to the left are varied.

Not the least of these reasons was the infiltration of the movement by the religious right, whom I find hypocritical in the extreme. They redefined what it actually meant to be a "conservative," and their new definition left a bad taste in my mouth. In my own case, that was sufficient to get me to distance myself from conservatism in general, but lately I've been giving more thought to why conservatives make feel stabby, and why the movement has become such a joke in my own mind.

I was reading the September 7th issue of Newsweek last night, and there's an interview with Sam Tanenhaus, the biographer of Whittaker Chambers and William F. Buckley, who has a new book out entitled The Death of Conservatism. In his interview with Jon Meacham, Mr. Tanenhaus makes the assertion that the "death of conservatism" is due, at least in part, to the movement's failure to denounce extremism and embrace an intelligent, mature structure that props up civil society as a whole rather than narrow mindedly focusing only on your own party or agenda.

This really resonated with me.

The thing that really bothers me about "modern" conservatives is just how wacky they are. There's no serious discussion, there's no compromise, there's no interest in the common good - there's only their so-called "platform" which usually includes religious overtones and lining their pockets and the pockets of their supporters. They're extreme, and they show no interest in moderating their movement to be more inclusive and less radical.

It's tough to take conservatism seriously when their poster children are Sarah Palin, Betsy McCaughey and Michele Bachmann. They're a far cry from William F. Buckley, Jr., with whom I rarely agreed but almost always respected. Every time the right tries to join the conversation, I keep thinking, this is the best you can do? I'm supposed to take you seriously when the people who are supposed to be representing you in the marketplace of ideas put forth "death panels" as their coup de grace?

There is a Basuto proverb that Robert Ruark used as an epigraph for his 1955 novel Something of Value: "If a man does away with his traditional way of living and throws away his good customs, he had better first make certain that he has something of value to replace them."

It seems to me that the modern conservative movement has done away with their "traditional way of living," and has not replaced it with something of value.

I know there are thoughtful, serious conservatives out there who have an interest in participating in the public discussion. I know they have something of value to contribute to our policies, culture, and political life. So where are they? Not in the public eye, and not highlighted by members of their own movement as spokespeople for their ideas.

It would be a lot easier for me, as a liberal, to find middle ground with conservatives if their public representatives weren't so inflexible and radical.

Now make no mistake - there are plenty of people on the left side of the spectrum who are just as extreme, and intend to push their agenda with no thoughts of compromise. I recognize this, and understand why Republicans are feeling disenfranchised by the power shift that has occurred in the last two years in Washington. I also recognize that as a liberal, the far left is less offensive to me than the far right. These are limitations of my own perspective, and I try to take them into account.

But our president is attempting to lead from a moderate position. The far left is unhappy with him because he's not pursuing a more liberal agenda, based on their own priorities.

And they're wrong. Just as wrong as the far right was when President Bush rolled over the concerns of the left during his administration.

I have no particular loyalty to any political ideology. My views and opinions are constantly evolving. But if the Republicans/Conservatives don't evict the crazies from their inner circle, it's a pretty safe bet that my view will never evolve to the right again.

August 'Tard of the Month

Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Well, September is upon us, and fall is in the air. Which means it's time to vote on the August 'Tard of the Month!

The conservative crazies have been especially active this month, so we almost have a right-wing wackadoodle theme going on here. The candidates: Sarah Palin, whose revelation of the Obama death panels rocked the country, unless you could actually, you know, READ; Anna Falling, who is running for the Mayor of Tulsa, OK on a platform of getting a Creationist exhibit at the local zoo; the Fort Dix Terrorists, who recorded their intentions and then took the evidence to Circuit City for replication, counting on that renowned "geek/client privilege" to keep their secrets; and Michele Bachmann, that bastion of critical thought, who's convinced that the only way to defeat health care reform is to pray and fast.

What say you, Hot Chicks and Smart Men?