Panties for Peace - Seriously

Saturday, May 31, 2008
No, no - this is a real initiative.

It's run by an organization called Lanna Action for Burma, and the purpose is to have thousands (millions?) of ladies from around the world mail their knickers to Burmese Foreign Mission and Embassies worldwide.

Seriously.

The reason for this is because the Generals who run the military junta are an extremely superstitious bunch, and they believe that touching panties or the traditional women’s sarong will eliminate their powers.

Seriously. I'm not making this up.

Lanna Action for Burma provides the addresses so that you can post your very own worn-out drawers to the Burmese Asshats at their foreign embassies.

Seriously, how does someone who believes that touching a woman's undergarments eliminates their power manage to accrue so much of it? Aside from the incredible stupidity of such a belief, it seems like all the resistance has to do is create a pantie-bomb, and the deal's over.

Christ on a crutch.


Shoot o' the Garter Belt to SkepChick

All Tom, All the Time

Friday, May 30, 2008
Yes, you can now get all the latest with All Tom, All the Time, at the new www.tomcruise.com.

Full of exciting content surrounding his 25 years in film, you could spend hours and hours perusing the photos, clips, and self-aggrandizing essays on the history of Tom Cruise.

Or you can just get it over with and stick a fork in your eye.

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 21


Brit's probate case is scheduled for July 31, but her attorney claims it will be harmful to Brit's mental condition! Her treatment is "fluid" and ongoing! Who Cares!

Boredom is Underrated

Thursday, May 29, 2008
Boredom is underrated.

I've come to this conclusion after experiencing the drama of multiple divorces, the drama of family arguments, the drama of layoffs, the drama of raising teenagers, the drama of political uncertainty.

I like being bored. I like being in a relationship where I don't have the constant drama. I like having a predictable life.

And in a complete non sequitur, The Smart Man and I are thinking it's time to do some more redecorating here at Casa HCDSM. I've never lived in one place long enough to redecorate, so this is a completely new experience for me. Fun, but not dramatic.

I'm an Alien Diplomat!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008
According to this CNN Quiz, if I worked in space, I'd be an Alien Diplomat, because of my tact and love of new cultures.

Stop laughing.

I'm capable of being tactful.

It's just usually too much work.

I said, stop laughing.


Wave o' the Tentacle to Random Michelle.

I'm Such a Dork


Your Score: The Dork


You scored 50 anxiety, 53 awkwardness, and 18 neuroticism!



You aren't particularly anxious, and you don't count things--but you do notice sometimes that you don't exactly fit in. Polite people would call you an eccentric, but you truly are The Dork! And proud. Just because you feel a little awkward at parties doesn't mean you're not happy with yourself and fairly relaxed.


Your low anxiety score implies that you are able to relax, can enjoy the here and now, and have a healthy amount of self-confidence.

Your high awkwardness score implies that you are socially inept, probably stick out from the crowd, and perhaps feel uncomfortable in large groups of people, such as at parties.

Your low neuroticism score implies that you don't exhibit subtle neurotic behaviors--your nails are probably an acceptable length, your pencils aren't covered with bite marks, and your bookcase isn't arranged alphabetically by genre. Congrats!


__
See the other results!

Well-Adjusted

The Neat Freak

The Dork

The Geek

Phobic

Obsessive-Compulsive

The Subtle Neurotic

The True Neurotic

Link: The Neurotic Test written by littlelostsnail on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test
View My Profile(littlelostsnail)

Tip 'o the Propeller-Beanie to Randam Michelle

Military's Rate of PTSD Increasing - How Shocking

In a shocking development, it appears that the rate of service members who are being diagnosed with PTSD has increased by 50% between 2006 and 2007.

The military feels the incidence of PTSD grew last year as more U.S. troops were exposed to combat, a lengthening of war zone rotations from 12 to 15 months and the rise in the number of troops serving repeated tours.

Thank you, Captain Obvious.

Of course, the military does not have sufficient numbers of mental health professionals to help these service members address their issues. There are only 1,431 mental health professionals among the nation's 1.4 million active-duty military personnel, and about 20,000 more full- and part-time professionals provide health care services for the Veterans Administration and the Pentagon.

So in the spirit that has made our country great, volunteer mental health professionals are donating their time through the Give An Hour program, the Soldier's Project, and the Coming Home Project. They're seeing vets and families for free in an effort to get these folks the help they need.

Yay, volunteerism! Go, mental health professionals!

Boo, military mental health services! Shame, shame, Pentagon!

Combat veterans, wounded in the line of duty, should never have to worry about their medical care.

While it's shameful that such organizations are necessary, I'm glad the psychiatric community is stepping up to this challenge. As one of the organizers said, "These young men and women volunteered to defend our nation, and now our nation can volunteer to serve them."

Indeed. Well done, folks, and thank you.

What the Fuck is Wrong With These People? - Wendy Portillo

Tuesday, May 27, 2008
We all know the Boards of Education in Florida are a bunch of dumbasses when it comes to their educational standards, but now it appears they've decided to compromise acceptable classroom behavior, as well. For teachers, that is.

It seems that Wendy Portillo, a teacher at Morningside Elementary in Port St Lucie, Florida, had a student in her class who is in the process of being diagnosed with autism. Like many autistic youngsters, Alex Barton has had behavioral problems for a number of years, and as such, has a tough time in his public school, where he is a member of Ms. Portillo's kindergarten class.

After a disciplinary incident, Ms. Portillo made Alex stand at the front of the class. She then encouraged the other members of the kindergarten class to openly discuss what they didn't like about Alex, while he had to stand there and listen.

She then decided to take a vote, a la "Survivor," on whether or not young Alex (who is five years old) should be allowed to remain in the class. He was "voted out," 14-2.

Needless to say, Alex is devastated by this emotional lynching, and his mother has heard him say to himself over and over, "I'm not special, I'm not special."

Fury.

My rage burns with the heat of 100 white-hot suns.

I want to drive, hell-bent for election, to the Denver International Airport, and fly to Port St. Lucie. I want to find Wendy Portillo and give her the beat-down of the century. I want to grind her face into the ground, make her eat dirt, and make her wish she'd never gone into education. I want to pull her hair out by the roots, tear her ears off and make her wish she'd never been born.

What the fuck is wrong with this woman? Who thinks humiliating and denigrating a young, disabled child, and teaching other kids to do the same, is acceptable behavior in an educator? Seriously, how has this woman made it so far without someone noticing what a horrible human being she is?

I'll tell you what's wrong with her, and I'll use a word that I use only in the most dire, most heinous circumstances: She's a cunt. She has a fatal flaw in her psyche that allows her to hurt and emotionally abuse a child for whom she has responsibility. She's fundamentally broken, and should never be allowed near children again. Ever.

This horrible excuse for a human being has been reassigned to an office duty post in the St. Lucie County School District. They'd do better to throw her in a bottomless pit where she can be slowly eaten by flesh-eating bacteria. Young Alex has not returned to class, and his mother is considering pressing charges.

This fabulous educator can be contacted at:

Wendy Portillo
4204 Okeechobee Rd
Fort Pierce, FL
34947
(772) 337-6730
PortilloW@stlucie.k12.fl.us

The Superintendent can be contacted at:

Michael J. Lannon
4204 Okeechobee Rd
Fort Pierce, FL
34947
(772)429-3925
LannonM@stlucie.k12.fl.us

You're welcome.

I'm off to go wash out my brain with lye, in an attempt to get this story out of my mind. I do not expect to succeed.


H/T to Cindi in CO and the Sun Sentinel

Ah, Bureaucracy

There's some redecorating going on here at Casa Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men. We're redecorating the spare room, and replacing the kids' old bunk beds with Queen sized beds.

The bunk beds were still in good shape, and the frames are very sturdy, so I put them up on the Denver CraigsList to see if someone else needed them.

To my surprise, I received an almost immediate response from a military family who was packing out for a move to Camp Pendleton. They have five kids, including a set of twins, and they thought the bunk beds would be perfect for them.

So we made arrangements for Brian to come pick them up. When he arrived, we heard a bit more about their family's story.

Brian is a Recon Marine who left the service after two hitches because he was tired of being away from his kids. He's had SCUBA School, Jump School, HALO training, SAR School, and all the other high value training members of the Special Forces get. So it came as no surprise when he was involuntarily recalled for duty in our Post-9/11 world.

After a tour, he was released back to the civilian world, and he and his family made their home here in Colorado. The surprise came when after one year in their new life, he was recalled again. He has orders to report to Camp Pendleton, and expects to be deployed shortly thereafter.

To add insult to injury, the military will not provide any money to the family to pay their moving expenses - instead they're expected to pay for the move out of pocket, and the military will reimburse them once they've arrived in California.

Hm.

I don't know about you guys, but I don't know very many young families with five children who have thousands of dollars lying around, available for use in moving the family somewhere they don't want to go to perform duties they don't want to do.

Why didn't they just keep Brian in after his first recall? According to him, it would of been less stressful on the family for him to have been forced into contiguous service than this constant back and forth.

And why didn't they give this family the money to move, instead of insisting they pay for it out of pocket? It seems like a huge slap in the face to this high-value service member, although I think his attitude is pretty darn good under the circumstances. He still loves the work and the service, and plans on staying in for retirement and a possible commission if this tour puts him over ten years.

Yeah. We couldn't take their money. My dad was a Recon Marine, and he would of rolled over in his grave if I had. And we, as a country, owe this young man and his family.

Sometimes I wonder about the military bureaucracy. Seriously wonder.

Good luck, Brian, and thank you to you and your family for your service and sacrifice.

'Tard of the Week - Keiffe & Sons Ford

Monday, May 26, 2008
Today I bring you a new feature - "'Tard of the Week."

And in honor of Memorial Day and all the men and women who have served, fought and died to protect our First Amendment rights, I'm naming Keiffe & Sons Ford the 'Tard of the Week."

Here's a transcript of a recent radio ad purchased by these ignoramus':

"Did you know that there are people in this country who want prayer out of schools, “Under God” out of the Pledge, and “In God We Trust” to be taken off our money?

"But did you know that 86% of Americans say they believe in God? Since we all know that 86 out of every 100 of us are Christians, who believe in God, we at Keiffe & Sons Ford wonder why we don’t tell the other 14% to sit down and shut up. I guess I just offended 14% of the people who are listening to this message. Well, if that is the case then I say that’s tough, this is America folks, it’s called free speech. None of us at Keiffe & Sons Ford is afraid to speak out. Keiffe & Sons Ford on Sierra Highway in Mojave and Rosamond, if we don’t see you today, by the grace of God, we’ll be here tomorrow.”


Kind of puts you in mind of Jim Crow, does it not?

The most retarded aspect of this, however, is the glaring hypocrisy of telling 14% of American citizens to "sit down and shut up" about their non-Christian religious belief (i.e., stop exercising their First Amendment rights), immediately followed by defending the Keiffe's bigotry by using the First Amendment.

Yeah.

I wonder if anyone with an IQ higher than a Brussels Sprout proofread this copy before they decided to put it on the air? Seriously. How do you miss a logical fallacy the size of the Mojave?

Well, guess what, Kieffe & Sons? I defended your right to free speech for 17 years, in uniform, and it seems glaringly obvious that you've never even read the Constitution, let alone made any effort to defend it. Your complete ignorance of the purpose of the First Amendment (to keep asshole bigots like yourself from persecuting the religious minority) leaves you profoundly unqualified to address it. Not that I expect you to stop spouting your bigotry veiled in pseudo-patriotism. As you note, it's your right.

But I'll exercise my own First Amendment right by making you my inaugural 'Tard of the Week, in honor of my brothers and sisters in arms, who swear to defend the Constitution with their lives. The Constitution you clearly think applies only to the majority and not to all citizens.

Epic fail, you 'Tard. Fuck off.

The gallery may now commence pointing and laughing.


Tip 'o the Navy Cover to Splendid Elles.

Memorial Day 2008

"Honor to the Soldier, and Sailor everywhere, who bravely bears his country's cause. Honor also to the citizen who cares for his brother in the field, and serves, as he best can, the same cause -- honor to him, only less than to him, who braves, for the common good, the storms of heaven and the storms of battle."

Abraham Lincoln, December 2, 1863

Today and every day, I honor you, my bothers and sisters-in-arms.

Today and every day, I respect you who have served before, who are currently serving, and those who will serve after.

Today and every day, I remember you who have sacrificed and struggled, so that I may live my life in freedom.

Today and every day, I am thankful to you who made the ultimate sacrifice in service to our country and Constitution.

"I do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God."

I remember.

Golf!

Sunday, May 25, 2008
We're off to golf this morning, and are having a very busy weekend so far.

I'll share all the exciting details as time permits.

Have fun!

Hmm...Long Weekend!

Saturday, May 24, 2008
I love long weekends.

This weekend's activities:

  • Make two batches of grape jelly, one for my Smart Man's Hot Mom, and one for my Gram's assisted living facility.
  • See the new Indiana Jones movie. And no, I don't give a rat's ass if the "Crystal Skulls" have any basis in historical fact, or not. It's a movie.
  • Play golf with my Smart Man, and enjoy the nice weather.
  • Complete my homework, including my final paper, in my "Law, Policy and Politics" course. This will take some additional effort, as this professor is a tough grader, but also provides interesting, helpful feedback in how to improve my work product.

My Smart Man will be working on Monday, so I'll probably work on my paper then.

What are you doing?

These People Make My Feet Swell

Friday, May 23, 2008
What the hell is wrong with the military junta in Myanmar/Burma*?

They've now decided to allow aid workers into the Irrawaddy Delta, but they still refuse to allow UK, US and French Navy vessels to dock with relief supplies.

The U.S. Navy did outstanding work in providing relief during the Tsunami, working around the clock to provide whatever services were required. I can only assume the Brits and the French have similar experience in these matters.

Do these dictators in funny hats think there's some secret plot to "land the Marines" by these three nations and take over their sorry, sorry country? Bitch, please. They're only trying to help relieve the suffering and allow the victims some hope of eating in the next year by providing seeds and such.

Oh, that's right. The Junta clearly don't give a rat's ass if their people suffer, starve or die of some other preventable cause as long as their own power base goes uncontested.

I've written before that China Sucks, but their response to their own natural disaster has been pretty admirable compared to these amoral fucksticks.

As an Aunt of mine says, some folks just need killing.


*And what the hell's the deal with the name of this place? I know the Junta changed the name to "Myanmar" in an effort to head off "Burmese" nationalism, but the press routinely refers to it as "Burma." Huh?

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 20


With the new Living Lohan reality show out soon, Michael Lohan has reopened divorce proceedings against mom Dina. Will the new drama force Lindsey to go without panties? Will the younger kids also start acting like white trash? Who Cares!

New Hobby, Part II, Amended

Thursday, May 22, 2008
As you all know, I've recently taken up the bass guitar.

Tonight I start my lessons. The delay was due to scheduling conflicts between the teacher I wanted and myself. But tonight's the night! At 6:30 p.m., I'll be embarking on my next hobby.

Strangely enough, I'm a bit nervous about it. I've been dinking around with it since I got the instrument, and I surely have nothing to prove, but I'm having the usual over-achiever anxieties.

But that's a topic for another day.

Hmm...Bass Guitar.

Wish me luck!

-----------------------

Amended 8:25 p.m.

Looks like the only luck I'll need is in finding a teacher who can keep track of where he's supposed to be and at what time.

I was stood up for my lesson, as the teacher misremembered my lesson date and time, and then promptly lost my contact information.

We're going to try and start next week, and if blows it off again, I'll be in the market for a new teacher. He appears to be a bit of a ditz, and I sincerely hope he's better equipped to teach music than he is in keeping track of his schedule.

When Hillbillies Attack, Part I

Wednesday, May 21, 2008
As you all may know, Hot Sister and frequent commenter Cindi in CO lives in a small, rural community. She and her Smart Man live on the edge of town, in a Fuck-You-Blue house with lots of flowers and my two feline nephews, Tommy and Scorch.

They also used to own the house across the street, which they sold over a year ago. It was a very old house, a converted chicken coop, and they lived there for many years. When my kids were small, they used to love going to visit their Aunt and Uncle "in the country." They would drive the tractor, hike in the local canyon, and help in the garden. Once they even helped their Uncle tear a building down. This is huge fun when you're 7 or 8.

Well, they sold that house to a neighbor family over a year ago. We'll call the neighbors "Bubba and Brittney."

God, what a mistake.

Bubba and Brittney are hillbillies. They have 4 kids of their own, several foster kids, and Brittney is pregnant again. She also runs an in-home daycare, and all of these children run around terrorizing the neighborhood and making the place look like a home for wayward, dirty, snot-smeared children. The backyard is fenced with chain-link (and not in a straight line), and with all the playground equipment back there, all those kids look like hamsters in a cage. There's also talk of the kids eating pages out of books for their roughage requirements, but that's probably just viscous rumor. Probably.

Well, once they purchased the property, the first thing Bubba and Brittney did was collapse the house into the basement, then set the entire kit and caboodle on fire.

Yes, I said fire.

And it smoldered for weeks until a heavy snow put it out.

Did I mention this property is in town? It is.

Good Grief.

But wait, there's more!

Since collapsing the house, there's been a huge hole in the middle of the lot where the house used to be. Well, you can't have that. Bubba and Britney's Chihuahua might fall in and wouldn't be able to get out! So they proceeded to fill the hole with garbage and garden detritus, essentially creating a huge, mulchy trash pit. Because, really, that's what everyone should do - purchase the lot next to theirs and use it as a personal dump. So convenient. So eco-friendly. So classy.

Once the pit started to fill up, Balls and Brainy...er, Bubba and Brittney, decided it was time to do something about the accumulation. Since fire worked so well the last time, they decided to go down that road once again.

Only this time, they decided to use a little accelerant. Gasoline, in fact. Five gallons of it.

And since the lot is sunken down from street level, and the foundation is even deeper than that, the fumes from the gasoline accumulated before they decided to light the match.

You Hot Chicks and Smart Men are an educated bunch. Can you guess what happened next? That's right - an explosion. The fireball was well above the roofs of the surrounding houses, shook the ground to the point where small objects fell off their perches, and windows of nearby homes were glowing orange from the conflagration.

Nearby homes like the one owned by my Hot Sister and Smart Brother-in-Law.

When Cindi approached Brittney about the incident, she claimed she had all the permits for a fire in town, and had cleared it with City Hall.

Is that right? Really?

Why do people lie about things that are so easily checked? Especially in a small community?

It seemed strange that the city would allow a permit for such an asinine endeavor, so my Hot Sister went to City Hall to chew some ass. Big Surprise! There was no permit issued.

When the local law enforcement representative appeared to discuss the matter with Bubba and Brittney, Brittney told him that the city clerk gave her verbal permission to light the fire, and waived the fee.

Right.

Because why wouldn't a city employee, who has one of the best jobs in the county, risk her employment and face liability to allow a couple of asshats to light a huge fire in city limits using gasoline as an accelerant? That sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

Bubba and Brittney have been cited for "open burning without a permit within city limits," and are currently cleaning up the property. They're also crying and whining about how they just wanted to burn a little trash, why was everyone so upset?

Evidently, Bubba's father, Bubba, Senior, was the brains behind this project. Of course he thinks that punching your wife in the eye when she tries to divorce your dumb ass is also acceptable behavior, so there you go.

The worst part? The fire also destroyed the tree my kids had helped select and plant on the lot, that they considered "their" tree.

When hillbillies attack, nobody wins.


Tip o' the John Deere cap to Cindi in CO for the source material

My Love-Hate Relationship With Spring

I love spring. By the time May arrives, I'm sick to death of the snow and the cold, and I'm ready for warm weather and green, growing things. I love my flowers and the budding trees.

I hate spring. Every time the warm weather arrives, the scourge arrives, on the warm spring breezes, to make my life miserable.

Pollen.

I have hay fever. I get the runny nose, the sneezing, the watery eyes, the full sinuses, the headache.

I use prescription medication to keep it under control, but every spring the pollen count is different, and I have to experiment with my meds to determine the correct dosage. Too much and it aggravates my insomnia, too little and I can't breathe.

Right now I'm in the "too little" camp, and I've been sniffling and snuffling for a week. I increased the dosage this morning, and I hope this takes care of it.

Or perhaps I can try homeopathy, and drink some not-pollen water. Yeah, I'm sure that'll work.

Nathan's At it Again

Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Yes, Nathan is at it again.

This time, he's directing his Polybloggimous readers to a blog written by some poor production assistant on the west coast called "The Anonymous Production Assistant's Blog."

The idea is to have folks descend on this poor person's blog as "visitors" and leave comments.

Silly, but fun, and Anonymous' 5/19 entry on the the royal "we" is pretty cool.

Head on over if you wish, and identify yourself in the comments as a member of the "Let's Go Visiting" horde.

Poor production assistant. I wonder what he or she is thinking about all these strangers descending en masse?

Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume IX


This is Dr. Sally Ride.

She is an astrophysicist, and has worked in the space program and science and engineering education for over 30 years. Her accomplishments and awards have spanned those years, and reflect the diversity of her accomplishments.

For me, though, I can never think of her without seeing the Time Magazine cover with her on the front. Ride, Sally Ride! read the headline, overlaid on her official NASA photo. Dr. Ride was to be the first American woman in space.

After joining NASA in 1977, Dr. Ride was a member of the 1983 Challenger mission STS-7. They lifted off on June 17, 1983. I had just graduated from High School, was shy of my 18th birthday, and had already enlisted in the U.S. Navy under the Delayed Entry Program. Seeing Dr. Ride's photo on that magazine, and reading about her accomplishment, gave me a sense of what was possible.

Dr. Ride doesn't see her accomplishment in the same way I do. She adamantly shunned the honor of being the first American woman in space, insisting she had not entered the space program "to become a historic figure or a symbol of progress for women."

Perhaps not. But her quiet competence gave young women and girls a glimpse of the future, and her continuing work in the area of girls' education has helped to ensure her legacy won't be wasted.

Dr. Sally Ride. Personal Hero. Ground breaker. All around Smart Chick and ill behaved woman.

Ride, Sally Ride!

Food Sex

Monday, May 19, 2008
Not that kind of food sex. Perv.

Courtesy of The Mechanicky Gal, here is a food experience that compares to sex...hence the moniker "food sex."


These are Jell-O pudding snacks, sugar free and sweetened with Splenda. 60 Calories! 1 serving of dairy! 1 Weight Watchers point!
They're delicious! They're guilt-free! They come in several tasty flavors!
C'mon...how can you not love pudding?

The Internet is Weird

Man, the Internet is weird. Or maybe I should say that the people on the Internet are weird.

Here are my favorite searches that landed folks here at Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men:

"Bionic teeth." I wish I had bionic teeth. Instead I have a screw in my head.

"Hot Afghan chicks." I think this was a hit because of this entry. I'm not sure what to say, here. What's hot about an abaya?

"Men doing shit photos." Really? This may have come up as a result of the tumbly trucks, but who knows?

"How old are you if you were born in 1968." Seriously, people. If you're bright enough to use a search engine, I would hope that you're bright enough to do simple arithmetic. What are they teaching in school these days? And get off my lawn! Blah, blah, blah...

"Celtic Thunder Keith Harkin gay." Why, yes, Cindi in CO, this is your fault. I warned you.

"my fiends hot mom." I can only assume this should of been "my friend's hot mom." But you never know. In either case, this is probably a reference to my own Hot Mom.

"Things that make you throw up." Pseudo-science? Fred Phelps? YECers? Spam-Bots? NAMBLA? Dog Fighting? The list is endless.

I'm going to be a busy, busy engineer today, as I have an enormous system in need of designing. Please amuse yourselves by discussing the strangest search phrases you've seen on your own blogs.

Sunday Puttering

Sunday, May 18, 2008
Today I'll be puttering around the house accomplishing such fascinating tasks as cleaning the fish tank, catching up on my TiVo and making apple-cinnamon jelly. Sorry, no Great Jelly Give-Away this time - I donate jam and jelly to the assisted living facility where my Gram lives, and they're out. I need to get cracking and restore their stores, so to speak. The old folks really enjoy it, and it gives my Gram props that her granddaughter, named for her, is supplying the home with their home-made jam.

Speaking of TiVo, my Smart Man and I were watching CSI: New York the other night. Normally we really like this show because we like Gary Sinise, although they write the Melina Kanakaredes character as a complete dumb-ass.

In this case, however, the dumbest line of the show came from the Anna Belknap character. As suspense builds, the nutbar murderer is having his kidnap victim blog live from the scene. Our heroes must find his location in order to save the day! Detective Lindsay Monroe, played by Anna Belknap, comes up with this solution:

"I'll write a GUI program in Visual Basic to see if I can find his IP Address."

But wait, there's more!

She later tells the boss that she's having trouble isolating the IP Address, because the blog posting activities aren't "streaming media," but get sent only when the author is posting.

Since the Smart Man and I both work in this field, much snorting, guffawing, and general disdain for the writing staff ensued.

Now I don't expect the show to go into some nerd-fest about traceroute, ARC caching, DHCP and packet based versus TDM communications, but surely they can do better than "I'll write a GUI program in Visual Basic to see if I can find his IP Address." Why didn't they just ask one of the IT guys if the line made sense? Duh.

So I'm off to putt. Enjoy this Flower Pr0n while I'm gone:

The flowers on the left actually grow on our neighbors trees, and have the sweetest smell. The yard in spring is always a sweet place. The flowers on the right is from the hanging basket my Smart Boy gave me for Mother's Day. Bless his heart, I'm glad he was thinking of me, and he says he'll understand when I inevitably kill them. Because that's just the way I roll.

In Which the Armed Forces Lead the Way...In More Ways Than One

Saturday, May 17, 2008
The Armed Forces' contribution to our society lies not only in smiting the wicked, but in the technological and scientific advancements that have cross-applications in the peace-time.

Nowhere is this more apparent to the civilian population than in the field of medicine. The requirements of caring for soldiers on the field of battle, providing palliative care, and saving as many lives as possible have led to the discipline of emergency medicine, widespread use of antibiotics, and blood collecting, storing and transfusion technologies.

And now, with more service members surviving their catastrophic injuries than ever before, the Armed Forces is prepared to lead the way again.

In April, the Pentagon announced the formation of the Armed Forces Institute of Regenerative Medicine (AFIRM). The Institute will form partnerships with groups currently working in regenerative medicine, providing consultative services and funding.

"The AFIRM team is committed to developing clinical therapies over the next five years focusing on the following five areas:

· Burn repair
· Wound healing without scarring
· Craniofacial reconstruction
· Limb reconstruction, regeneration or transplantation
· Compartment syndrome, a condition related to inflammation after surgery or injury that can lead to increased pressure, impaired blood flow, nerve damage and muscle death"

Obviously, these therapies will have far-reaching affects for all humans suffering these types of catastrophic injuries. One researcher that I found especially intriguing is the work of Dr. Jorg Gerlach. "Dr. Gerlach, at the University of Pittsburgh's McGowan Institute for Regenerative Medicine, is isolating patients' own skin stem cells from a small patch of healthy skin. Then, using a specially developed skin-cell gun, he sprays them onto the wounded area in a fine mist. Over a period of two to six weeks, the cells grow into functional skin, including dermis, epidermis and blood vessels. There is little scarring, and because Gerlach includes the patient's own pigment cells in the mix, the new skin looks natural. In one pilot study, he treated eight patients in Germany with good results."

How cool is that? A skin spray gun. What a fabulous alternative to skin grafts and abridement.

While I would never wish a catastrophic injury on any of my brothers and sisters-in-arms, I can be pleased and proud that the treatment of their injuries will benefit not only them, but the wider world.

Your Friday Giggle

Friday, May 16, 2008


This description of what the Bad Astronomer calls the Grand Unified Conspiracy Theory will either make you laugh out loud or melt your brain. Please note that I have warned you - if your brain does indeed melt, HCDSM will not be liable.

The bright side: Freeze Dried Whack-a-Loons are not limited to the religious right of the U.S. Doesn't that make you feel better?

I Love Sesame Street

I admit it. I love Sesame Street.

I so enjoyed watching this show with my kids when they were small. Everyone who was anyone, from Jim Carrey to C-3PO to R.E.M. to the Tokyo String Quartet would guest star on Sesame Street, working for a pittance in order to join this select group, and, I suspect, to please the little people in their lives.

I was sad when my own kids grew too old to enjoy Bert and Ernie, Cookie Monster, the Count, Oscar the Grouch and Aloysius Snuffleupagus.

I was pleased and proud when the Children's Television Workshop decided to tackle the issue of AIDS through the HIV positive Muppet Kami.

And now Sesame Street has decided to take on the issues of military deployment, separation, war injury and homecoming.

In a series of short videos, Elmo, Tully, Rosita and their pals discuss the challenges of military life from a small child's point of view. Tackling such issues as separation, war injury and the inevitable changes that come to families when a member is deployed, Sesame Street attempts to help families ease the transition and address kids' concerns.

Age appropriate but honest, these videos give families a framework from which to start discussions, and also a way to reassure kids they're not alone in their feelings or situation.

Go, Sesame Street! You rule.

I love Sesame Street. I wish I could live there.

But since I can't, I'll be happy for the generations of kids whose lives were enriched by the presence of these characters. Nice work, guys.

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 19

Now that California's Judicial Branch has ordered the legislature to pull their head out of their collective butt, Ellen and Portia will wed immediately! Ellen made the surprise announcement during her show! Who Cares!

Vice Presidential Selections

Thursday, May 15, 2008
So I've decided to ignore Hillary's arm waving, and speculate on Vice President nominee selections.

For Senator McCain, I think it's imperative that he choose someone smart and young. Why, yes, my alter ego is Captain Obvious.

Actually, I don't care who McCain selects. He lost my vote when he chose not to support S.22, the Post-9/11 Veterans Educational Assistance Act. I had some serious concerns about him before that (torture, anyone?), but given his personal history, the sheer hypocrisy of failing to support this measure just puts me over the edge. See you, Senator McCain. Courage may matter, but apparently only if the courage of your convictions doesn't interfere with your presidential ambitions.

For Senator Obama, I'm concerned that Hillary's political machinations may force him to ask her to be his running mate, a la JFK and LBJ. That would really suck for me, because I believe it would reward her bad behavior and compromise Obama's position. I'm not such a tin-foil-hat conspiracy theorist that I think the Clintons would "take care of" Obama, but I don't want her in the incumbent position for future elections. I was ambivalent about her prior to the primaries, now she's just left a bad taste in my mouth.

My choice? I think Senator Obama should ask Senator James Webb of Virginia to be his running mate, and not just because I'm a Senator Webb Fan-Girl.

Webb is strong where Obama is weak, i.e., matters concerning the Armed Forces. They have similar reputations in terms of being people of principle. Webb is a bit older, and so has all the vaunted "experience" Obama's detractors say is lacking.

Plus there's the added bonus that he would then be the incumbent.

Not that I have ulterior motives, or anything.

Who do you want to see selected as the running-mates?

Dr. Brian May

Wednesday, May 14, 2008
How cool is it that Brian May went back to get his Ph.D in Astrophysics after he was done being all rock-star-y as the lead guitarist for Queen?

The Griffith Park Observatory Planetarium in Los Angeles just named a seat for Dr. May.

See? Smart Men are hot, and geeks are cool.

2008 Flower Pr0n Part III


My yellow Iris' started blooming when I was out of town.

I love my yellow iris'.

She's Just Splendid!


Check out a blog written by Splendid Elles, a local teen here in Colorado.


A most interesting young woman.

I Have a Smart Boy

My Smart Boy is a singer, and last night his school had the last choral concert of the season. This year, the Smart Boy lettered in music, and so will be sporting a Letterman's Jacket this coming winter for his senior year of High School.

He also received an additional award - the Choir's Most Improved Singer. While I'm obviously a biased observer, I think he really earned this award. This year, his voice has really matured, gaining a breadth and timbre that was lacking when he was younger. He's also done a good job of developing his ear and learning more theory, so his sight reading skills have really improved as well.

I'm proud of my Smart Boy. I hope he chooses to continue with music when he's in college.

Back to Work - Again

Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Well, I'm logged in and back to work today.

As usual, some of the more urgent work was completed by my backup, but most has been sitting, awaiting my return.

As usual, I have dozens of requests in my "inbox," that all need to be completed "first thing Tuesday morning."

As usual, once I plow through the hundreds of e:mails and touch base with my backup, I will perform the work on a "first in, first out" basis.

As usual, there will be sales teams who will be upset by this policy, because really, their projects are the most important ones on the planet, and as such, should get my immediate attention.

As usual, my response to their distress will be, "whatever."

So things are pretty much status quo here.

Did I mention I have a paper due today?

*groan*

Home!

Monday, May 12, 2008
Attention, grandparents travelling with your 3 year old grandchild:

Her screeching with excitement at the top of her voice in that piercing little girl voice on a crowded airplane is not cute. Got it? NOT CUTE. It's FUCKING ANNOYING.

You're lucky I'm such a restrained citizen, otherwise I might of drowned the little git.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part XI

Well, I'm heading home this morning.

As usual, we had a FABULOUS time eating food that's not good for us, drinking too much alcohol and not exercising. As usual, I managed to spill Mexican food on Amy's (genuine) Persian carpets, and as usual, she thought it was funny instead of telling me I had eat at the kiddie table. And as usual, I'll go home to Colorado, enjoying the life that I've chosen, but just slightly wistful about leaving San Diego, one of my favorite cities on earth.

Talk to you all when I get home!

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part X

Sunday, May 11, 2008
Today's exciting activities included a visit to the Outlet Mall on the U.S.-Mexico border:



Hmmm....Kenneth Cole. Hmmm....Coach.

Amy got a new bag at Coach. Score!

I bought some new bras. Remember, ladies, you need to get fitted every year, and replace as appropriate.

You men can take your fingers out of your ears and stop saying "lalalala!" now.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part IX

In which Francesca the Huntress lies in wait under the jade plant, camouflaged, waiting for the wildebeest to approach the watering hole:




Or maybe just an impudent mocking bird, walking unsuspecting to its doom, into the maw of the great huntress...

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part VIII

So Amy lives in an extremely hilly community. The entire thing has ups and downs all over the place, and there isn't a level lot in the bunch. As a result, you see a lot of retaining walls.

Amy has a neighbor on her "uphill" side named "Sam." In the Sam's yard there is a bamboo plant, abutting the retaining wall. Now, anyone who knows anything about bamboo knows that it grows really, really fast, and spreads quickly. That's one of the reasons is such a favorite among the sustainability folks. That's also the reason it's a Really Bad Idea to plant one so close to a retaining wall:



Now, to give Sam a break, he did not plant this bamboo - he bought the house while Amy was on deployment, and the previous owners did not inform him that Amy had already spoken to the previous owners about removing the bamboo because it was displacing the retaining wall. Sam bought the house "unawares," as it were. However, once Amy returned from deployment, she immediately told Sam that the bamboo had to go, because it was causing structural damage to the wall. Would you like to guess if Sam removed the bamboo? Ding, ding, ding.

Please note that Amy has been fucking around with this thing for as long as I've known her - 16 years. The bamboo is still growing, the wall is still being displaced, and the list is becoming alarming.

So Amy is now getting bids from contractors to come in, excavate and demolish the wall, and put a new wall in. This, of course, requires permits, material, heavy equipment, ad naseum. It will probably cost around $10K. Even though the damage is due to the neighbor's negligence, Amy is willing to split the cost with him in order to keep the wall from collapsing on her head one fine day. I think that's pretty darn generous. If the neighbor can't come up with the cash (he doesn't make a lot of money), Amy will replace the wall, then put a lien on his property for the entire amount.

Now, this might seem like a harsh thing to do to the poor neighbor, who works at in-home hospice care, caring for dying people. At least I thought it was a bit harsh...until I met him.

He came over to discuss the wall, and other neighborhood goings-on. While here, they told me there was a home up the street that is being rented by a member of the Aryan Nation Brotherhood, complete with tattoos. I mentioned to Amy that it's a good thing I didn't live in this neighborhood, because I was liable to picket his house, and subsequently get shot (Aryan Nation Boy was just released from prison).

Sam's response? "I think it's okay to hate black people. As long as you don't act on it."

I'm sorry, what did you say?

"Everyone is prejudiced. It's okay to hate black people. You just don't act on it."

You know, not really, you ignorant fuck. Everyone is not prejudiced, although I could successfully argue that everyone is biased. It is not okay to hate black people, or brown people, or fat people, or poor people. Because typically, even though you may have a desire "not to act on it," you will. Whether it's avoiding contact with the hated group, or making decisions about your daily life, the truth will out, and you're still an ignorant, stupid fucktard.

Now, I realize I'm an axle-wrapping militant about certain things. Abuse of children and pets. Honor killings. Sex crimes. Racism. I'll admit that Sam pushed my buttons, because he chose to spout off on an issue that gets me wrapped around the axle. But seriously? Seriously? Who thinks that hating an entire group of people based on the color of their skin is okay? Who? What rock was he raised under that he still thinks that this is the mind-set of an enlightened individual? I'm not talking about being political correct here - if Sam had said there was aspects of inner-city black culture that he didn't care for (rap, bling, pants hanging down around the ass, the acceptability of impregnating women without supporting the baby), he would not have earned my ire. There are aspects of my own culture I find offensive - I'm not going to give someone the Smackdown because they have personal preference on a culture not their own. But "it's okay to hate black people?" That kind of talk makes me physically ill.

Now, you may be Proud of Me. Instead of ranting at Sam, and telling him Karma will be paying a visit someday soon in order to repay his hate-filled heart, I let him know I did not agree with his position, and that while behavior is the ultimate arbiter of a person, intentions matter. This is Amy's neighbor, who she has to deal with on a daily or weekly basis, and my screeching at him about being an ignorant, racist asshat will not make Amy's life any easier.


So I allowed my feelings to be known, and dropped the subject. But you can bet that my ability to be civil has been stretched oh-so-thin, and that I will not be conversing with Sam the Ignorant Fuck again.

Amy's not sure what he was thinking by making those remarks, and expects he'll ask her at some future point if I thought he was serious. Guess what, Asshat? Telling someone you just met that "it's okay to hate black people" is not the way to impress. I'm not impressed, it's not acceptable, and I still think you're an ignorant fucktard who's a racist asshat.

Words matter.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part VII

Saturday, May 10, 2008
So I thought we'd share the food and beverage selection available here at Casa Amy during the gal-pal weekend:




Why, yes, that is why we only do this twice a year, thanks for asking.

Disclaimer: The box-o-wine is Amy's. I don't drink wine.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part VI

Yesterday when we returned from the airport, Francesca the Huntress was lolling in the front yard, and a mocking bird was dive-bombing her. Like all good cats, she ignored this uppity mocking bird, but she evidently took note.

This morning, we found the detritus of her evening snack:









Ew. This is why I have a wimpy, wimpy dog who couldn't catch a cold. Ew.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part V, aka Flower Pr0n

Just for the amateur horticulturalists in the group, here's a dose of San Diego Flower Pr0n from Amy's garden:













Today's agenda includes returning some items to Target, finding a protege for Francesca the Huntress, and alcohol and Mexican food.
And remember, folks, you can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part IV

Friday, May 9, 2008
To complete our exciting activities for the day, we went and got our pedicures at the local nail shop, followed by shopping at the lingerie department of Target. Hilarity ensured when we needed a price check on ladies thongs, and the clerk couldn't understand why we kept insisting she announce it on the loudspeaker: "Price check on ladies' green thongs, size extra-large!" She thought she was cool with her face-piercings and her fire-engine red hair. We showed her. Amateur.


Here's my new pedicure that incidentally matches my Jeep:





Here's Amy's pedicure with her enviable glitter sandals, available at Target for $4.95, no price check required.



We're off to drink heavily and laugh until our sides hurt. Enjoy the rest of your evening, as any further entries today will likely be the result of overindulgence and an overestimation of our own cleverness. Since one usually follows the other, consider yourself forewarned.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part III

While shopping for our weekend nourishment, Amy and Janiece are rendered speechless by the sight of this women's hair. Our first thought was that she much have some sort of heinous disease, however, upon closer examination, it turned out she simply had the Most Horrible Weave in the History of the World. This is definitely a Hair Don't - a veritable cornucopia of don't-ness, you might say.


Luckily, she did not notice I was snapping this picture, otherwise I'm sure I would of received the Legendary Navy Commissary Smackdown.

So who told this poor woman that this 'do was becoming? Seriously, who? Her formerly abused daughter, who secretly wishes ridicule and pain on her mother? Her passive aggressive spouse, who secretly wishes he could slowly poison her with toxic weave material? Certainly not her hairdresser. Surely not.

Someone needs to be painfully honest with this poor woman. Honestly.

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part II

In which Amy and Janiece enjoy rolled tacos from the local Taco Chop for lunch:




Hmmm....Rolled Tacos!

Next stop: Liquor and Junk Food Shopping!

Very Important Business in San Diego, Part I

I'm leaving for San Diego this morning to visit occasional commenter and long-time pal The Mechanicky Gal, aka Amy. I'll be there through the weekend, returning on Monday.


While I'm there, we will be engaged in Very Important Business. We'll be documenting these earth-shattering activities for your entertainment as they occur.


You're welcome.

Who Cares? Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 19



Barbara Walters has illicit affair with African-American Senator! Has Barbara always been a big rebel? What other affairs has she had in the last 30 years? Who Cares! No, really...Who Cares?

Good News

Thursday, May 8, 2008
I just heard from my Smart Man, who has been working as a contractor at a major telecom company here in Colorado for quite some time. As a contractor, he wasn't eligible for benefits like 401K and paid vacation.

Today he got job offered for a permanent position!

So it's back to being able to take a day off without "budgeting" for it, and contributing to our retirement fund.

Go, Smart Man, Go!

Modest Needs

I was listening to my NPR podcasts yesterday, as I do everyday, and they featured a charity called "Modest Needs."

Modest Needs' mission:

"To prevent otherwise financially self-sufficient individuals and families from entering the cycle of poverty, when this might be avoided with a small amount of well-timed financial assistance;

"To restore the financial self-sufficiency of individuals who are willing to work but are temporarily unable to do so because they do not have the means to remit payment for a work-related expense; and

"To empower permanently disadvantaged individuals who otherwise live within their limited means to continue to live independently, despite a temporary, unexpected financial set-back."

They use a grant system, where qualified applicants receive money for specific needs in these categories:

"Self-Sufficiency Grants. Modest Needs makes Self-Sufficiency Grants by remitting payment to a creditor / for an expense on behalf of an otherwise self-sufficient individual or family for a relatively small, emergency expense which the individual or family could not have anticipated or prepared for. In making a Self-Sufficiency Grant, our goal is to prevent an otherwise self-sufficient individual or family from entering the cycle of poverty as a result of the financial burden posed by a relatively small emergency expense. For example, we might make a Self-Sufficiency Grant to cover the cost of an emergency auto repair that must be made if an individual is to continue working.

"Back-to-Work Grants. Modest Needs makes Back-to-Work grants by remitting payment for a small work-related fee or expense on behalf of a temporarily unemployed individual. In making a Back-to-Work grant, our goal is to provide a willing but temporarily unemployed individual with the means to return to work. For example, we might make a Back to Work grant to cover the cost of a professional license renewal for a temporarily displaced worker.

"Independent Living Grants. Modest Needs makes Independent Living Grants by remitting payment to a creditor / for an expense on behalf of persons who are permanently unable to work but who nevertheless are living independently on the limited income to which they are entitled - their retirement income, or their permanent disability income, for example. In making an Independent Living Grant, our goal is to empower financially responsible persons who cannot work to continue to live independently on their limited incomes, despite an unexpected expense which no conventional agency is prepared to address. For example, we might make an Independent Living Grant to cover the cost of maintenance on a piece of accessibility equipment not covered by Medicaid, to cover an unexpectedly large prescription medication co-pay, or to assist with a large summer cooling bill."

So donors to the web site deposit their money into an account, where the money is given a "point" value. You then select the grant applicants you'd like to help. Once an applicant has enough "points," their grant is immediately given, as only qualified applicants are posted to the web site.

How cool is this? Seriously, how cool? This charity allows people who are on the knife blade of poverty to get the help they need to stay self-sufficient. Anyone who's ever lived paycheck to paycheck knows that it only takes one unexpected expenditure or emergency to push you into unmanageable debt, public assistance, or homelessness. How cool that this group helps folks who want to be independent remain so, and executes its mission in such a way that contributors can be involved in the process.

I've been sending my monthly charity donations to Kiva, but since that program is a loan service, my donations to date are almost self-sustaining on a monthly basis. Whenever a loan is repaid, I reloan it immediately.

So I think I'll change to Modest Needs on June 1st. For some reason this program really appeals to me.

Go, helping people!

Loot! Loot! Loot for ME!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Okay, I admit I stole the subject line from Michelle. She tells me that every time the UPS man comes to her door, she's running through the house yelling, "Loot! Loot! Loot for ME!"

The mental image made me smile, so I'm using it.

Frequent commenter and Hot Sister Cindi sent me this in the mail today:


It made me smile, and I was tempted to run the through the house yelling "Loot! Loot! Loot for ME!" But my family already thinks I'm certifiable, and I'm afraid it might of pushed them over the edge to the "maybe it's time to consider supervised care" point of view. So I just smiled to myself and took the picture.

My camera doesn't do too well on objects this small, but you can see it's a small bass guitar pin.

Loot in the mail is always a welcome distraction. Thanks, Beanie!

In Which I Try to Paint My House, Part II

So I heard from the HOA yesterday. To give the manager credit, he made an effort to be responsive and courteous.

Here's the swatch I painted:

The HOA approved the yellow, but they were "concerned" that the rust color would be "too much" if I used it for all of the trim on our house. So I'll be using the rust as an accent color and painting most of the trim white.


At this point, I just want to get it over with so we can start on the inside projects, including new tile for the floors of the kitchen and the utility room. It's currently white linoleum:

Who the hell chooses white linoleum for a floor in a house designed for a family? I hate this stuff. 10 minutes after the cleaning crews leave, it looks like poo. We're going to replace it with terra cotta textured tiles. I can't wait!

On the Nature of Duty and Politics

This is today's quote from The Notebooks of Lazarus Long:

"Do not confuse "duty" with what other people expect of you, they are utterly different. Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anything from years of patient work to instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self-respect.

"But there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible. It is easier to deal with a footpad than it is with a leech who wants 'just a few minutes of your time, please - this won't take long.' Time is your total capital, and the minutes of your life are painfully few. If you allow yourself to fall into the vice of agreeing to such requests, they quickly snowball to the point where these parasites will use up 100 percent of your time - and squawk for more!

"So learn to say No - and to be rude about it when necessary.

"Otherwise you will not have time to carry out your duty, or to do your own work, and certainly no time for love and happiness. The termites will nibble away your life and leave none of it for you.

"(This rule does not mean you must not do a favor for a friend, or even a stranger. But let the choice be yours. Don't do it because it is 'expected' of you.)"

This got me thinking about how Hillary considers the concept of duty and its role in her candidacy.

Does she consider it her duty to remain in the race? Does she consider it the duty of the Democratic party to give her the nomination? Does she consider the people who are asking her to sit down and shut up termites who are trying to nibble away her life and goals?

I don't think anyone can definitively say what the Psychology of Hillary is really like - she may not know herself what is motivating her behavior. But something must be, whether it's a sense of duty or a sense of entitlement. That woman will just Not Give Up.

I don't know if that's a good quality or a bad one in a presidential candidate, although I'm starting to think Hillary is "staying the course," if you know what I mean.

Go home, Hillary. Your public persona is changing from one of a tenacious, capable leader into a sad, sad also-ran. I don't think you want that to be your legacy.

2008 Flower Pr0n Part I

Tuesday, May 6, 2008
In an effort to class this place up a bit, here's a photo of my purple Iris', which started blooming yesterday:


Research Subjects Needed

Sam Harris, author of The End of Faith and Letter to a Christian Nation, is looking for research subjects for his new study on belief and disbelief and the brain. If you're interested in participating, you can find the questionnaires here. I understand he's especially in need of Christian participants.

Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History, Volume VIII

Mildred Jeter Loving died on Friday at the age of 68.

She lived a perfectly normal life with her husband Richard, raising three children in Virginia. She was a housewife, and her husband was a construction worker. They married in 1958. her husband predeceased her in 1975.

So why take note?

Because Mrs. Loving was black, and Mr. Loving was white. When they married in 1958, it was illegal for them to do so in their home state, and so they drove to Washington, D.C..

Upon their return, they were arrested for "unlawful cohabitation" and ordered to leave the state for 25 years. The judge who ruled in their case issued a statement:

"Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix."

Really, who could argue with that stunning piece of logic?

The American Civil Liberties Union, that's who. They filed suit on the Loving's behalf, and the case was heard by the Supreme Court of the United States in 1967. SCOTUS unanimously ruled in favor of the Lovings, clearly calling out the racism of the law that prevented them from marrying. The Lovings subsequently moved back to Virginia after the ruling.

Mrs. Loving was a quiet woman, and didn't really think the court case was that big of deal. "The preacher at my church classified me with Rosa Parks," she told The Washington Post in 1992. "I don't feel like that. Not at all. What happened, we really didn't intend for it to happen. What we wanted, we wanted to come home."

She is clearly a modest person, but the bottom line is that a well-behaved woman would not have fallen in love or acted on that love with a white man in the first place. But she did, and with her husband, made history, and made our country a better place to live. Thank you, Mrs. Loving.

I'm a Zombie Killa, Yo


The Zombie Survival Test -- Make and Take a Fun Quiz @ NerdTests.com's User Tests!

H/T to Jim over at Stonekettle Station

Various and Sundry

Monday, May 5, 2008
Anne's Open House

I went to Anne's Open House yesterday. My Smart Man had some sauerkraut that didn't agree with him, and so stayed home, but I had a great time. I met Anne's frequent commenters Stacey and J.R., as well as the infamous Grabill Family. Anne's friends and family are fun and engaging, and her house is just so cute and suits her perfectly. We're going to try and go to dinner when she returns from India next month.

Happy Birthday!

Frequent commenter and Hot Sister Cindi in CO is celebrating her birthday today. What's that? Why, yes, she is older than me, thanks for asking.

Note to Hillary

After you're done telling everyone how "elitist" Obama is, make sure to post pictures of you new Halloween costume, "the kettle." Or "the pot." Whichever you're most comfortable with.

Dentist Dread

I have to go to the dentist later this morning for my quarterly cleaning. I really, really don't like to go to the dentist.

Austin Cline

Today's daily dose of sarcasm courtesy of Austin Cline is the last one. I'm open to suggestion for a replacement feature, otherwise I'll probably just delete it.

Upcoming Gal-Pal Weekend

This weekend I'll be flying to San Diego to spend some time with my friend and occasional commenter The Mechanicky Gal. We have very important business to conduct, which we will blog about as appropriate. Because I know you all are just wildly curious about what occurs when two old Navy friends get together for a long weekend. Your wish is our command!

Attention Men: Bald is Sexy, Toupees Are Not

Sunday, May 4, 2008
So we went to see the Rockies versus the Dodgers last night. The Rockies lost (again), but we enjoyed the game and visiting with my Aunt and Uncle, who are two of the nicest people on the planet.

After we had sat down and ate our Rockies Dogs, a couple came down and sat in the seat in front of us. The woman had Farrah Fawcett hair and was a Dodgers fan. We knew this because she told everyone around her that she was, and how excited she was to see them at Coors Field.

Now, being a Dodgers fan isn't usually grounds for being thrown over the rail of the Lower Reserved Infield, but in her case I was willing to make an exception. She was loud. She probably thought she was being friendly and funny. She wasn't. She cheered loudly and leaped to her feet every time a Dodger hit a ball - even when it was foul. She kept treating us to a whale-tail view of her Superman Thong every time she stood up or sat down. She was just fucking annoying. But the real blog-fodder came from her male companion.

While he was not obnoxious in any overt way, he had one of the worst toupee's I have ever seen. It just sat there like a skinned rat on the top of his head. That's bad enough, but it was filthy. And I mean filthy. It had grotty clumps of God-knows-what stuck in it, looking almost like he had put the glue on the outside instead of the inside. It had no sheen or natural luster whatsoever. It had tiny bits of detritus in it, which looked like dandruff. How you manage to get dandruff in a toupee is beyond me, though. I would not have been surprised to see a colony of bugs who might have taken up residence for the duration.

Ew. Just ew.

Attention, men! If you find yourself going bald, please do the world (and yourself) a favor and just shave your head. Don't try and comb it over. Don't buy a cheap toupee. And please don't assume that your grotty, filthy, disgusting toupee makes you more attractive than being bald. Because it doesn't. In any way. Even if your head has an odd shape, it's still better than walking around town with a health hazard glued to your noggin. Shave your head. Bald is sexy. Bald is fashionable. Bald is easy to take care of, and you won't inadvertently provide a home to a colony of gnats, or worse.

But best of all, bald is not a cheap, laughable toupee. Do it for your girlfriend. Do it for yourself. Do it for the Children. Just do it.

Happy Anniversary

Saturday, May 3, 2008
Frequent commenter and family member Cindi in CO is celebrating her wedding anniversary today. She and her Smart Man have been married for like, 100 years. Seriously. He calls her "Edith" and she calls him "Homer," and it (obviously) works for them.

So Happy Anniversary!

Busy, Busy, but Not

I have a lot to do this weekend. I have my regular reading and homework for my Law, Policy and Politics class. I have a paper on the legalization of gay marriage due May 13th. I have to finish my spring yard work after a trip to Home Depot last night. My Smart Man and I are going to go see the Rockies and the Dodgers play tonight at Coors Field with my Aunt and Uncle. Tomorrow is Anne's Open House, which we're planning on attending. I'd like to practice my bass.

So why am I writing a blog entry at 10:00 a.m., when I have so much to do?

Because I'm feeling exceedingly unmotivated today.

I really don't feel like doing anything except playing Age of Empires and knitting.

Unfortunately, that's not really an option. I'm going to be in San Diego for a gal's weekend next weekend, so I can't put off my school work. I didn't do my yard work last weekend because the weather was crappy and I didn't go to Lowe's. So now I'm really trying to convince myself to get cracking.

Yeah, you can see how well that's working out.

Credit Card Reform - You Think?

Friday, May 2, 2008
I read in the Washington Post this morning that the Federal Reserve is planning on cracking down on credit card companies for some of their more unsavory practices. According to the Post:

"The proposed regulations, which could be finalized by year's end, would label as 'unfair or deceptive' practices that consumers have long complained about. That includes charging interest on debt that has been repaid and assessing late fees when consumers are not given a reasonable amount of time to make a payment. When different interest rates apply to different balances on one card, companies would be prohibited from applying a payment first to the balance with the lowest rate...'Disclosure has been the tool of choice for regulators. Now they are saying that unfair practices are out of control and they need to ban those practices,' said Edmund Mierzwinski, consumer program director for U.S. PIRG, a consumer advocacy group. 'This is surprising coming from banking regulators.'"

You think?

Credit card companies have to be the most sleazy, manipulative, greedy asshats in our society. Seriously. Can you think of a legal industry that preys more on the uninformed and uneducated in order to line their pockets? And if you don't believe that they have nefarious motivations, feel free to watch Frontline's "Secret History of the Credit Card".

And their K Street cronies keep the wheels greased for them. The new bankruptcy laws were heavily supported by the credit card companies, since it placed limits on whether or not someone could file Chapter 7 (liquidation) rather than Chapter 13 (repayment). Because really, when someone has to file bankruptcy due to a medical event, the credit card companies shouldn't have to forgo payment. That's just crazy talk.

While I realize that I'm a liberal wackadoo and that influences my opinion, I'm glad the Fed is taking an interest in this matter and more heavily regulating credit card companies. Whenever I hear about how profitable credit cards are, I always think of the tirade uttered by my favorite Boston Legal character, Jerry Espenson, when he was discussing the "terms and conditions" of a credit card agreement. I can't find the exact quote, but he essentially says, "I have a law degree from Yale and an MBA from Harvard, and even I can't figure out what this means!"

Just so.