Miscellany

Monday, January 31, 2011
Dread

I've been dreading this week from a work perspective. There are a variety of reasons for this (none of which are suitable for public consumption), but mostly I'm just sad and disappointed on a professional level. I've been with my company for a long time, and like any long-term relationship, there are ebbs and flows. I'm just in an "ebb" right now. I really dislike dreading work days, though, so I'm working on resolving my feelings in a satisfactory way, if possible.

Where's the Boeph

Everyone's up in arms over the shocking revelation that the "beef" used in Taco Bell's products is actually only about 35% beef, with the balance being Thor-only-knows-what. Now I love Taco Bell. It's been my favorite fast food for 100 years, and the news that their beef is questionable doesn't change that for me. Because, really, when I pay 79 cents for a taco, I am under no illusions as to the quality of the ingredients. Hell, for 79 cents, I'm just happy the meat filling isn't green. Let's be honest - Taco Bell is a purveyor of Food Porn. Don't act all shocked when you get what you paid for. If you want Kobe beef, then go to del Frisco's.

I Don't ♥ IT 

Sorry to pile on to those of you who work in IT, but Christ on a crutch, why is it so fucking hard to get anything fixed? I spend at least 40 person hours a year fucking around with IT, either trying to get things to work that should work, or trying to get services that our IT department offers, but it takes months to get activated. I know of some companies whose IT department has 30 days to respond to a trouble ticket. Way to be responsive, IT. You  RULE. I'll be sure and send a note to the CIO about how great you're doing - right after I'm done waiting for the next available agent.

Unserious

Saturday, January 29, 2011
One of the things that make me stabby (or shovel-y, if you prefer) is when people attempt to push their completely unserious ideas into a serious situation or conversation. It's almost like a corollary to the Dunning-Kruger effect, whereby someone who is completely unqualified to comment or participate in a specific conversation insists on pushing their way in, spouting incredible nonsense and turning the entire thing into a huge joke.

This irks me because while dumbasses who are chewing the fat with their equally dumb friends have a limited impact on public discourse and the direction of our country, such incidences appear to be on the rise in public life. Leaving aside the Shes Who Will Not Be Named, it's frickin' everywhere, and it's making me wish I had the necessary survival skills to live in the Alaskan interior with no contact with the outside world.

But since I don't have those skills (and I consider it a hardship to even spend the night somewhere where I can't shave my legs and wash my hair - I've done my time in the field, thankyouverymuch), instead I will list the things that will automatically label people as "unserious" in my mind, and thus not worthy of my consideration:
  1. You think astrology has a scientific basis, and that the recent debate surrounding precession proves it. Whaa...?
  2. You think there's some efficacy associated with homeopathy. It's water, you dumbshit.
  3. Your political hero doesn't understand that the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence are not the same document, and that one is the law of the land, and one is not.
  4. Your political hero has no grasp of American history. At all.
  5. You're an Ayn Rand apologist. Seriously - she was a hypocritical harpy with megalomaniacal tendencies. Emotionally mature people outgrow this sort of nonsense in early adulthood. Please join us.
  6. You don't understand that "fascist" is a right wing position, not a liberal one. 
  7. You think that "Ghost Hunters" and other paranormal reality shows actually have some basis in reality. Really?
  8. You believe the entire American government is just one huge conspiracy whose only goal is to hide the imminent alien invasion/the cure for cancer/the REAL culprit behind the 9/11 attacks/fill in the blank. Seriously? The government's incompetencies are legion - and you think they can keep those kinds of secrets?
  9. You think mental illness or homosexuality is a failure of will rather than a result of biology. 
I think I need to give myself an attitude adjustment before I hurt someone.

Kimby is Not a Yeti

Friday, January 28, 2011
We met in a hockey bar that was a real dive. My kind of place.
I can report that the elusive Kimby, the Canadian contingent of the UCF, is an actual, live Trollop, and not a Kim-bot or a Yeti.

We met for dinner at a place called Cobo Joe's, a hockey bar across the street from Joe Louis Arena in Detroit. It was kind of run down, cheap, and we were the only women there. But it had the advantage of being within walking distance of the bus stop where Kimby was let off after crossing the border.

Taken after the waitress shot fire out of her mouth. Don't ask.
We drank beer, ate bar food, and thoroughly enjoyed each others' company. I was delighted to finally get a chance to meet Kimby, and she's as sweet, friendly and charming in person as she is on the Internet.

As far as I know, Kimby was the last member of our little group to meet someone in meat space. So the circle is now complete.

What I Owe

I try not to complain too much about work. After all, my company pays me good money to perform tasks for which I'm both highly qualified and usually enjoy. There's something to be said for that, and I'm acutely aware of how very lucky I am.

But.

Why do certain types of people believe that others have an obligation to clean up their professional messes? You know the type of person I'm referring to - the ones who think they're somehow entitled to drop the ball on a continual basis, and then look to others to "fix" the issue.

It's not that fixing problems isn't the right thing to do, nor is working as a team a burden. But if there's an individual who is always the source of problems, and yet always considers it someone else's responsibility to resolve them, I think it's probably past time to reevaluate their effectiveness.

Why do incompetents believe that others owe them their expertise? They might as well come right out and say, "I can't do my job effectively, so it's your responsibility to do it for me so that I don't get fired."

I don't get it.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Observations on Traveling

Thursday, January 27, 2011
If I was a middle-aged woman who just HAD to read those insipid Stephanie Meyer vampires are sparkly books, I don't think I would advertise that fact by reading them on an airplane. I tend to think of those books in the same category as masturbation - there's really nothing wrong with it, but it is something you should do in the privacy of your own home, rather than in public.

I forgot to write down the alphanumeric identifier where I left my Jeep before leaving the airport parking lot. This means I will spend at least an hour wandering around DIA short term parking, looking for my vehicle, cursing like the sailor I am.

I really need to get another charger for my Blackberry. I always forget the damn thing when I travel, and then have to conserve the battery, which is a huge pain in my ass.

Is there anything more pathetic than pudgy, balding, middle-aged men trying to pick up women in a hotel bar?

No sightings of Yetis as yet, but I am hyper alert to the possibility. Only so I can run them over with my rented Ford Focus, of course. Because I'm all about the hate - it's just who I am.

Yetis and Kimby aside, I really don't want to return to Detroit any time soon. The weather is crappy, the roads are terrible, and the recession has been very hard on this community. It's depressing.

Missing My Gram

Wednesday, January 26, 2011
A year ago today, my family lost its matriarch - my Grandma Winky.

It still seems strange that I no longer send flowers for birthday or Christmas, or send homemade jams to the assisted living facility where she spent her last years. 

It's the natural order of things. But I still miss you, Gram.

Well, I Pissed Someone Off

Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Because I get to spend the next several days in Detroit. In January.

I'm traveling on business, of course - why the hell else would I go there at the end of January? The only upside is that I get to meet the elusive Kimby, the Canadian contingent of the UCF, and who I believe to be the last person who's not had a meat-up with another member of our on-line community. There are rumors that she might in fact be a Kim-Bot. I shall report back on that matter, unless I'm assimilated.

You know the drill - I'll try to post periodically, but no promises.

Moral Relativism, Part II

Monday, January 24, 2011
I have always had a problem with moral relativism. I've struggled with it for years, and tried to educate myself on the topic through University coursework and other reading. And I'm finding that in spite of my liberal outlook and dedication to self-determination, more and more I think it's just a big, stinking pile of poo. When you intentionally partake in a societal norm that reduces the quality of life for another, you're going to have a hard time justifying your bad behavior to me on the grounds of multiculturalism.

I'm thinking about this lately because I'm currently listening to The Moral Landscape by Sam Harris. While I don't agree with everything he posits in this book (and I'm not finished with it, so by the end I may think he's full of poo, too), I've been spending quite a lot of time saying to myself, "Why, yes, Sam, that does make a lot of sense." Why can't we put some sort of objective standard* to moral behavior?

It bears closer examination from my perspective, so as a stake in the ground, I'll define immoral behavior as that which negatively impacts the demonstrable** long-term well-being of another. Moral behavior I'll define as acts which positively impacts the demonstrable long-term well-being of another.

It's not that simple, of course, and I'm still thinking about and working through what I really think about this. I can think of many circumstances where making the moral choice is ambiguous at best, impossible at worst. And Western civilization certainly doesn't have a monopoly on moral behavior. In fact, there are aspects of Western culture that are decidedly immoral by the yardstick I'm using. But it irks me when people try to imply that morality is entirely a relative construct, and that modern cultures whose morality is influenced by the enlightenment are somehow elitist because we think barbarism and the subjugation of women and children are immoral. I will freely admit that part of my irritation is engendered by the fact that these same people are perfectly willing to entertain the idea that other cultures may have valid points of criticism to make about the West, but won't consider that the converse may be true, as well. If, as an enlightened society, we have an obligation to examine our definition of "well-being" in light of other people's viewpoints (and we do), then other societies have the same obligation to us.

One of the many things I'm struggling with is what this viewpoint means in terms of our obligations to societies that are judged to be "immoral" by this yardstick. Do we have an obligation to educate, to liberate, to put up social constructs that more closely align with an objective standard of morality? Is this violation of their self-determination more or less immoral than doing nothing and allowing these cultures to find their own way?

I don't have the answers, of course, But I feel obligated to think about it, and apply my conclusions (if any) to my opinions about our foreign policy, which NGO charities I choose to support, and the other small ways in which I affect the world.

Not to sound like a complete whiny-butt, but being an adult who tries to live an examined life sure requires a lot of effort.


___________
*Harris uses the term "well-being" to describe this standard, but I don't think it matters what you call it.

**Please note the inclusion of the qualifier "demonstrable." That means you don't get to point to some non-provable religious dogma and say you're improving little Khadijah's chance at a fabulous afterlife by mutilating her genitals and making sure she remains illiterate. Thanks for playing, but no.

Shawn Wins the Internet

Friday, January 21, 2011

Boogie Blogging Friday - Big and Strong Edition

"Whatchoo Looking At? I'm a BIG AND STRONG boy. And HANDSOME."
Boogie the Giant Schnauzer went for his bath and a haircut yesterday, and his new sleek look gives us a better idea of his level of fitness.

As you'll recall, he was on forced inactivity for some time, and as a result, the muscles supporting his hips and back legs lost tone and mass. That's the way it is with us older mammals - you lay off the daily exercise for a while, and suddenly you're a big pile of flab.

As you can see, his muscles are rebuilding nicely, although he still has a ways to go. What a bummer that it takes so much longer to build it back up than it takes to tear it down. This aging crap is for the birds.

Moving Day

Thursday, January 20, 2011
The Smart Man and I are on vacation today, helping my Hot Daughter move back into the Big Yellow House. She's a full time student, and decided that living with us rent-free was probably better than incurring student debt when her career choice (Middle School English teacher) doesn't really lend itself well to being in hock post-graduation.

We're delighted to have her, of course, as she has grown into a really fine young woman, comfortable in her skin, and focused on her future. Go, Hot Daughter.

The only downside is her unnatural fondness for lime green, personified in a paint color called "Alien Green."

I see primer in my future.

Inspiration

Wednesday, January 19, 2011
More details are now available surrounding what exactly happened the day of the Giffords shootings. A surveillance tape has been viewed by law enforcement, and apparently one of the things that happened in the confusion was the emergence of yet another hero.

After Loughner started shooting into the crowd, Judge John M. Roll evidently sacrificed his life in an effort to save another. Richard Kastigar, the investigative and operational bureau chief of the Pima County Sheriff's Department, describes what happened:
[The judge was] intentionally trying to help Mr. Barber. It’s very clear to me the judge was thinking of his fellow human more than himself… He pushes Mr. Barber with his right hand and guides him with his left hand. The judge was on top of him and is covering up Mr. Barber, literally lying on top of him, and his back was exposed.
I can speculate that Judge Roll's family might wish events had unfolded differently, but one thing I can say with surety: In the confusion and heat of this moment, this man proved who he was. Unequivocally, and without a doubt. As John Steakley wrote, "You are what you do when it counts." On January 8, 2011, the Honorable Judge John M. Roll stood up and was counted.

Fair winds and following seas, Judge Roll. While I would wish for another outcome for you and your family's sake, your final moments are a credit to your humanity.

______
H/T to the inspirational Eric.

Balance

Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Have you ever noticed that when things are going swimmingly in one part of your life, they promptly go to shit in another?

So while my personal and family life is just swell, professionally I feel like crap on a cracker. I'm not really at liberty to discuss the issues here (aside from a plethora of IT trouble, none of which is resolved), but suffice it to say that I would be simply delighted to find work that didn't involve politics, or working well with others, or actually having to interact with other human beings at all.

Obviously that's not going to happen. Should I be grateful that there's balance in my life, and that things don't all go to crap simultaneously? Or should I plan on some sort of psychotic break in my future?*


__________
*Note: There will be no psychotic break, or murderous rampage, or any other antisocial behavior with the exception of generalized whining. This shit's not that important. Although, if I have to hear "please hold for the next available agent" while attempting to resolve my IT issues one more time, I may reconsider.

The Detritus of My Mind

Monday, January 17, 2011
Because really, you know your Monday won't be complete without knowing what's knocking around in the dark corners of my mind.

1. I'm currently listening to Packing for Mars: The Curious Science of Life in the Void by Mary Roach. She really does write the most interesting books, but I could have continued indefinitely to live as a fan-girl of the space program without the details of hygiene in space. Ew.

2. If you want to work as a tutor, it might behoove you to be available sometime other than "before 11:00 a.m." Not to put too fine a point on it, but doesn't your target demographic have other fish to fry during those hours? Just askin'.

3. Today is Martin Luther King, Jr. day. I have to work, because my company doesn't observe the federal holiday schedule. Since it's not very busy, I've been reflecting on the man's life and work, however. As noted by Hampton Sides in this week's Newsweek,
If Martin Luther King Jr. were alive today—he would have turned 82 last week—he would in all likelihood be in Arizona, marching against the forces of violence. Not that he’d be particularly welcome there. Arizona, of course, is the state whose former governor, Evan Mecham, made headlines back in the 1980s defending the word “pickaninny” and scrapping the state’s observance of the MLK holiday. King’s views on the Second Amendment would be suspect in many parts of this heat-packin’ state—a place where firearm ownership, entwined with a certain strain of reactionary patriotism, has in some quarters reached the level of High Creed.

Dr. King must be so very proud of how far we've come since freeze-dried whackadoo James Earl Ray decided he deserved the notoriety of killing a public figure. How depressing.

4. I'm sort of out of control when it comes to my Cool Auntie shopping. But can you blame me? There's just so much cool stuff out there.

5. I am so over corporate-speak and the behavior it encourages I can't even tell you. For example: "She's not hungry enough" or "We need help messaging this to the team." What the fuck do those things even mean? English, motherfucker - do you speak it?

6.The fact that dogs have co-evolved with people to achieve an unprecedented level of partnership with us is cool as shit.

Mathematics and Online Learning

Sunday, January 16, 2011
I've decided that the subject of mathematics just doesn't lend itself well to online learning, at least for me.

I'm in the middle of my Quantitative Reasoning class, and, as happened during last year's statistics class, my head is all fuzzy from trying to learn the material straight from the book. I've started looking for a tutor, and I suspect whoever I hire will be coming by for the next two months or so.

Here's the thing - I can do this. I got an A in statistics, and once I had a live human sit down and explain the concepts to me and then answer my questions in real time, I didn't struggle with the material. I expect the same will be true with the material in this class, but simply reading the text and then attempting to apply it on my own is singularly ineffective with me.

It's too late for me to try and take this class on campus, and it's my last mathematics course for this program. But if a mathematics course is required for my post-graduate work (whatever that might be), I've decided to overcome my reclusive nature and actually take the class on campus. Live and learn - literally.

Boogie Blogging Friday - Part II, Spiffy Edition

Friday, January 14, 2011

Now that the Incomparable Boogie™ is an older dog, he can no longer stand the bitter cold that comes when I need to walk him before the sun comes up in the winter. There were a couple times this week where he simply did not enjoy his outing because it was just too damn cold.

Since forgoing his walkies is simply out of the question, I instead ordered him this spiffy new coat from REI to keep him warm on the chilliest mornings. He's not too impressed, since we've never put him in any kind of doggie clothing before, but I suspect he'll get used to it.

Bitter cold, we laugh at thee! For we have modern fabrics and Teflon on our side!

Boogie Blogging Friday - Make Me Happy Edition


After events of the last week, and the less than appropriate reaction of well, almost everyone, I need something that makes me happy.

Into the breach comes the Incomparable Boogie™, with his demonstrable pleasure in walking in the snow, playing with his toys, and enjoying his treaty-treats. A pure, simple soul is my Boogie, full of joy, and his presence in my daily life indeed makes me happy.

Mission accomplished.

Big Fat Hypocrite*

Thursday, January 13, 2011
In December of last year, a Colorado State Senator named Suzanne Williams was involved in a fatal car accident outside of Amarillo, TX. According to Reuters, Senator Williams veered into oncoming traffic, hitting a  vehicle containing the Gomez family. The two children and Mr. Gomez survived, but the pregnant Mrs. Gomez was killed. Her baby was delivered by Cesarean section and remains in intensive care. Senator Williams' passengers, her adult son and two minor grandchildren, also survived.

The investigation is still ongoing, and once complete, will be presented to a Grand Jury to determine if charges should be filed against the Senator.

Now I don't have the details on this accident. I wasn't there. I don't know if Senator Williams was negligent. That's for the Grand Jury to decide. But she's still a big, fat hypocrite, and here's why.

At the time of the accident, Senator Williams was the vice-chairwoman of the Colorado senate's transportation committee. In that role, she pushed for legislation making unrestrained motorists and passengers a primary traffic offense. That means you could get pulled over here in Colorado purely on the basis of not wearing your seat belt. I have my own opinion about that particular piece of legislation, but here's the part where Senator Williams' hypocrisy is glaring: A Texas Department of Public Safety preliminary report concluded that the Senator was the only one in her vehicle who was wearing a seat belt. Her son and three-year-old grandson were ejected from the vehicle. Her seven-year-old grandson was not ejected, but was also unrestrained.

But wait! There's more!

The three-year-old was obviously too young to be riding in a car without a car seat or a booster seat. And the Senator had one in the vehicle. And following the accident, the Senator "moved the ejected boy to the car seat in the vehicle," according to the preliminary report.

In other words, she knew she was wrong, and tried to cover up her poor judgment after the fact.

Now, in terms of culpability, I totally blame the adult son for the fact that he and his children were not restrained in the vehicle. Only a complete idiot lets their children ride in a car unrestrained. But here's the thing - when I drive, people in my car wear seat belts. Period. This has been my policy for many, many years, and it's non-negotiable, because I've done the research and I know that my passengers will have a much higher rate of survival in case of an accident if they're restrained. If the people who ride with me don't like my policy, they're more than welcome to find another ride. Or they can walk. Their choice.

So, given the Senator's stance on restraints in moving vehicles, why didn't she have a similar personal policy? Because she's a big, fat hypocrite, that's why. Which is also why
Colorado Senate President Brandon Shaffer invited Senator Williams to resign in light of recent events.

Naturally, Senator Williams has chosen not to do that, although she has been stripped of her transportation committee responsibilities.

What I wouldn't give for a public official who actually did what they said they would do, and who comported themselves in a way that doesn't discredit their office.

Maybe I'm just tired.


__________
*You thought I was going to talk about that raving idiot Sarah Palin, didn't you? Unfortunately, she's not the only idiot in the public eye, and their are other writings out there that more effectively eviscerate her racist dumbassery.

One of Those Days

Wednesday, January 12, 2011
"I'm the guy who does his job. You must be the other guy." - Staff Sergeant Dignam, The Departed.

Why yes, I am having one of those days. Thanks for asking. I think I need another vacation.

Also: Is it just me, or is the right getting stupider by the day? William F. Buckley, Jr. would be so proud.

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Tuesday, January 11, 2011
The Good

Daniel Hernandez is twenty years old, and a junior at the University of Arizona. He's also an intern with Representative Gabrielle Giffords' office. And on his fifth day of work, he saved the Congresswoman's life by administering first aid.

In the wake of this horrific event, it's worth noting that it was a young person, a young person who evidently has some commitment to our nation's governance, who emerged as the hero of the day. Congresswoman Giffords may not fully recover from this, but thanks to Mr. Hernandez, she has a chance to live a full life.

The Bad

The Tea Party Express, Sarah Palin's retarded Butt-Monkey, is using the Giffords assassination attempt as an opportunity to...raise money. No, I'm not making that up. Follow the link. Classy, TPE. Real classy. And you wonder why serious minded people won't take you seriously.

The Ugly

Speaking of classy behavior in the public sphere, that freeze dried piece of spooge Fred Phelps and his bitter band of hate-mongers have decided that god sent Laughlin to kill those people in Tucson. And OF COURSE they intend to picket the funerals of the dead, including that of the nine year old girl.

I sincerely hope the people of Tucson do what needs to be done to protect their city from these horrifying human beings (and I use the term loosely). I think they should take a cue from the good people of Weston, MO, who mobilized their community to exclude WBC from the funeral of Sergeant First Class C.J. Sadellf.

Get thee behind me, Phelps. And stay there.

Banality

Monday, January 10, 2011
I can't think of a single thing to write about today that isn't banal, repetitious or just plain depressing. I feel like our nation has turned a corner - a corner that leads to a street we really didn't want to go down, but that's where we ended up because we fell asleep when the crazy kid with the learner's permit was behind the wheel.

While I hope that the tragic events of Saturday will lead to a more civil discourse in this country, I'm not holding my breath.

So in the spirit of banality, here's Wailing Souls singing Picky Picky Head. At least listening to this makes me smile...because waiting around for the world to change sure won't.


We Simply Don't Know

Sunday, January 9, 2011
We simply don't know what motivated yesterday's shootings in Tucson, AZ. We don't know if the individual(s) responsible were "inspired" by politics, or religion, or history, or were just plain-jane whackjobs whose mental capacity is so far gone we'll never know what the point was.

We don't know. So I think it's appropriate for both sides to stop assigning blame and wildly speculating about matters where there's not yet a clear answer. Because it's not helping, you see.

But there's something we do know - the vile rhetoric and incitement to violence that has recently characterized the populist right's position isn't helping, either. So to Sarah, Sharon, Glenn, Rush, et al: Don't you think it's past time for you all to shut the fuck up? Because regardless of whether or not yesterday's tragic events were inspired by your comments, the fact of the matter is that such behavior is seditious. And since that's such a big word, here's a little something to help you figure it out:

se·di·tion. [si-dish-uhn]  –noun
1. incitement of discontent or rebellion against a government.
2. any action, esp. in speech or writing, promoting such discontent or rebellion.
3. Archaic . rebellious disorder

Corporate America: A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy

Friday, January 7, 2011
In the last week, two people I care about have been royally screwed over by corporate America. The details aren't mine to share, but suffice it to say that both individuals were exposed to unethical behavior that clearly demonstrated the companies in question don't give a good goddamn about their employees, and in fact consider them a burden whose salaries do nothing but negatively impact the bottom line.

These latest incidents have done nothing to change my opinion that Corporate America is, in fact, a wretched hive of scum and villainy.

But for me, the key question is, why is corporate America such a shithole? It's not because each and every middle or upper manager is an unethical douchebag whose moral compass points directly to the fourth circle of Hell,* although there are plenty of those.

In addition to the douchebags, I've worked with some fine people over the years. Some of them were consistent in their ethical behavior, i.e., the rules that governed their behavior were consistent regardless of their situation. But others were wildly inconsistent - they'd crap all over their employees, but they would never dream of treating other human beings as commodities to be run over at their earliest convenience in their personal lives. What I want to know is, how do people who fall into the second category live with themselves? 

No, really - I want to know. I've worked hard over the years to integrate my personality in a way that makes me a consistent human being regardless of the conditions where I find myself. In some ways that's good - if you perceive me to be a hard-working, ethical employee, it's a safe bet you'd consider me a hard-working, ethical human, as well. Conversely, if you think I'm a pushy bitch at work...well, you get the idea.

How do people rationalize assbag behavior in their professional lives and still manage to see themselves as the heroes of their own stories? Clearly, they're bifurcating their professional lives from their personal ones in their own minds, in order to ensure they can live with themselves. But I don't understand how they can do so.

I just don't get it.

____________
*Although I have my doubts about this in regard to most "executives." Just sayin'.

Count Down to Backpedaling...

Thursday, January 6, 2011
Great Britain's Mike Deer is reporting in the BMJ, the Sunday Times and on Britain's Channel 4 Network that freeze-dried whackadoo Andrew Wakefield wasn't just WRONG when he published his study linking the MMR vaccine with autism, he was a liar, liar, pants on fire. That's right - he and his colleagues deliberately falsified the data to support the conclusion they wanted. I'm pretty sure that's called FRAUD.

How long do you suppose it will be until the anti-vaxxers, those CRITICAL THINKERS OF OUR TIME, begin backpedaling? I suspect their rationale will be along the lines of, "Just because our hero is a big fat liar, liar, pants on fire who falsified the data that started our movement doesn't mean that vaccines DON'T CAUSE AUTISM."

In 5...4...3...2...1...

::gulp::

Wednesday, January 5, 2011
As part of my job, I periodically have to attend conferences where my company's products and services are showcased to a larger audience. Sometimes that audience is our end customers, and sometimes that audience is business partners who resell our products and services as part of our dealer network. My role usually consists of manning a booth, discussing our solutions with passersby, or giving talks in break-out sessions to technical audiences.

I'm scheduled to attend such an event next month, and for the first time, I will be giving a "general session" presentation. The audience for this presentation will number at least in the hundreds.

Now, I'm no stranger to public speaking. Over half my working life has been spent in positions where giving technical presentations or training was an integral part of my duties. I'm used to it. I'm good at it. But I've never presented to such a large audience.

It's freaking me out a little, man.

I suspect that's a good thing - my concern over doing a good job will force me to prepare appropriately. Unless I trip over my own feet (if you've met me, you know that's a distinct possibility), I think I'll do just fine. I hope.

A Zero Sum Choice

Monday, January 3, 2011
I have a problem. I'm mildly allergic to the tetanus vaccination. My arm swells up and turns a most unattractive shade of red. It's not a life-threatening reaction, but it was sufficient for our family doctor to recommend the administration of the vaccine only on a reactive basis rather than proactive one.

I've always been okay with that, until the recent outbreak of pertussis in California encouraged me to get a booster. I hadn't had that vaccine since boot camp, and I felt compelled to put my money where my mouth is when it comes to herd immunity. So off I went to my GP to request the booster.

The only vaccination they had on-hand was the DTaP, a combination vaccine that included the tetanus component. I asked my GP to see if Kaiser could order a vaccine for me that excluded the tetanus component. She did so, and guess what? There's no such thing, not even for children. All current vaccines in this country that contain the pertussis component ALSO contain the tetanus component.

This really pisses me off - I'm at a point in my life where babies are starting to make appearances. My cousin and his wife recently had a darling baby boy, and my Smart BIL and his Awesome, Awesome Wife are also expecting. Eventually, the Smart Twins may choose to have families of their own. And I'm not immunized. 

What kind of Cool Auntie would I be, exposing the babies in my life to a hotbed of pertussis and diphtheria germs? A very bad Auntie, that's what kind. So do I take the chance and get the vaccine, or skip it and resign myself to minimal contact with the babies in my life until after their first birthday?

Man, that second option just blows. 

I ♥ Math

Sunday, January 2, 2011
Okay, not really.

But I have started the work for my Quantitative Reasoning class at DU, and I think it's going to be completely manageable. The work appears to be straightforward, and much of the homework appears to surround using the various functions of Excel.

Of course, I do have a bit more confidence surrounding math after getting an A on my thrice-damned statistics class, and suspect this course will be easier for me than statistics. For me, quadratic equations and amortization are far simpler concepts than continuous probability distributions and the central limit theorem.


I wasn't looking forward to starting this quarter (it conflicts with my tendency toward being a lazy git), but now that I'm back at it, I'm a happy college student once again. Math FTW!

This I Believe - 2011

Saturday, January 1, 2011
I believe in gratitude.

When I was a youngster, I had an upper middle-class, privileged view of the world. I felt I was entitled to the things and advantages my parents worked so hard to provide to me. I was profoundly ungrateful for my privilege, and in many ways I squandered it.

Once I left the protection of my parents' home and was exposed to life outside the United States, I slowly came to realize how very lucky I was. Unlike so many, I had always had enough to eat. If I was sick, I went to a fully trained and certified medical professional. I had a family who cared for and supported me. I never had to sell my body to strangers to feed my family. I was given the opportunity to be educated. I had indoor plumbing.

My life has experienced many ups and downs since I achieved adulthood. And in good times and bad, it's easy for me to lose sight of how very much I have to be grateful for. I get wrapped up in my first world problems, and lose perspective.

Over the last month, I have joined my friend Jeri in a small end of year experiment whereby we each found and posted something we were grateful for on a daily basis. This endeavor has forced me to examine the daily events of my life and put them in the context of gratitude.
  • The garage door opener required replacement - but we have the money in the bank to pay for it without having to worry about not paying the utility bill or skimping on groceries.
  • I suffered from one of my periodic outbreaks of shingles last month - but it's only a few days of discomfort, rather than chemotherapy, or radiation, or surgery.
  • The twins' hooptie-car requires a repair that cost more than the vehicle is worth - but we have the resources to provide safe transportation rather than being forced to let them drive an unreliable car.
Looking at my life and daily struggles through the prism of gratitude has allowed me to reestablish a level of proportion in my life. My minor irritations are nothing compared to what the majority of the human population deals with every single day. Looking for something to be grateful for on a daily basis, even on the worst of days, reminds me that no matter how bad things might get within a specific situation, I have a wonderful, blessed life, with incredible resources at my disposal.

Gratitude has given me the gift of calm, of serenity, of seeing my life through eyes that view more than just my immediate surroundings. Gratitude allows me to remain happy and content in the face of life's challenges. Reminding myself of what I have to be grateful for, instead of concentrating on the negative, makes me love my life anew, every day.