The Unforgivable Sin

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

I'm a big believer in forgiveness. It's good for me, as it allows me to move along smartly with my life without allowing those I perceive to have wronged me taking up permanent residence in my head. Sometimes it takes me a long time to forgive someone who has done me particularly grievous harm, but eventually I'll come around, forgive the person in question, and move on with my life. Typically the person in question is no longer welcome in my life after that, but hey, I'm okay with that.

But there is one thing that falls under "unforgivable sin" in my forgiveness rubric. And that thing is causing grievous harm to those I care deeply about.

I don't know why I'm willing to forgive those who do me harm, but not those who do harm to people I love, although I'm sure there's some deep psychological reason for it. Maybe it's because I know I have the skills and the practice to be able to manage such things, and I'm not sure if my loved ones do, as well. Maybe it's because when something like this happens, I want to fix it, and relieve the pain of the person I love, but I can't. So I'm not only railing against the perpetrator for causing harm to the person I love, but also for making me feel powerless. Maybe it's because Karma just doesn't work fast enough for my tastes, and really I'm just a vengeful bitch.

But one thing's for sure. There are two people on this list, and I wouldn't spit on them if they were on fire. Sometimes I feel bad about that, and think I need to work harder at being kinder and more forgiving. And sometimes I'm just grateful the list isn't longer.

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NOTE: I'm not going to write about the example that precipitated this blog post, as it's not my story to tell. But believe you me, if there was ever someone who fell into "unforgivable" category, it's the individual who caused this pain.

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