A Week of Gratitude, Day Five - My Smart Man

Thursday, December 8, 2011
When I was a younger woman, I had really poor taste in men. The reasons for this are legion, and include such perennial favorites as low self-esteem, self-destructive tendencies, and poor impulse control.

But as I continued on my journey toward being the person I wanted to be, I realized that I deserved more. I deserved a relationship that didn't make me feel bad about myself. I deserved a relationship where my partner saw me for who I was, and forgave me my faults while loving and admiring my virtues. I deserved someone who I loved and admired in return, who inspired me to be a better person without being condescending or contemptuous.

And I found him.

The Smart Man is my friend. When I'm wrong, he doesn't let me off the hook, but he's still on my side. He knows that when you go to the theater or a five star restaurant, you dress appropriately. When others hurt me, he's full of righteous indignation on my behalf. He knows that clip on ties are anathema for anyone over the age of seven. He sees me for who I am, and loves me because, not in spite of, that. He knows that black socks with tennis shoes are really a bad idea. He's generous with my family, and appreciates that I'm generous with his. He reads voraciously, and shares his passions with others. He makes me laugh, and even though he says I'm not funny, he's wrong.

These daily things are what keeps us whole, and what has stood us in good stead for the last thirteen years.

It took a long time for me to craft the life I wanted, and to craft myself into the person I wanted to be. And it took a long time for me to find someone to share my life. But I'm profoundly grateful that I did, and that it turned out to be him.

6 comments:

Anne C. said...

I love this post. Seeing the two of you together is one of my chief pleasures in life. <3

Carol Elaine said...

Janiece, I am soooo looking forward to meeting your Smart Man. And I am so happy for the both of you.

Random Michelle K said...

You think he could give Michael some training on footwear?

I love my husband dearly, but sometimes the way he dresses makes me cringe.

:D

John the Scientist said...

Picky, picky, picky. How about the white sweat socks with black shoes and a cheap blue suit a la the Japanese salaryman look? How about that? ;p

Janiece said...

No. Just no.

Carol Elaine said...

Michelle, I adore my HotScienceGuy, but his idea of dressing up is wearing a polo shirt with his khakis and white athletic shoes. Someday I hope to get him into a button down shirt at least once, though I honestly wouldn't bet on my chances.