A Service of Love

Friday, August 16, 2013
When we were planning the Memorial Service for my daughter, one of the things we wanted was for the proceedings to be about her. Not about anybody else's beliefs, not about how she chose to end her life, but about her impact on the world, the example she set for others, and how she left the world a better place than she found it. She was agnostic, and none of us were the least bit interested in having some fire and brimstone preacher-man who never knew her hijack her service to advance his own agenda.*

So we decided that we would basically conduct the service ourselves. People who knew and loved her chose to speak, and tell stories about her life, and how she lived, interspersed with music that I selected.

I'm glad we made this decision - everyone has to deal with the fact of her death in their own way, based on their own belief system, but the common denominator was our love for her, and I thought the service was lovely. I hope she would have approved.

A number of people have asked about the music, so here's what I selected, which was played before and after the service, and between speakers:

Wagner's The Ring Cycle

I Want to Hold Your Hand, Glee Cast recording, featuring Chris Colfer


Still Within the Sound of My Voice, from Cry Like a Rainstorm, Howl Like the Wind, Linda Ronstadt


Hallelujah, from Hymns from the 48th Parallel, k.d. lang



Eva (Orchestral), from Dark Passion Play, Nightwish

 

Touch the Sky, from Brave, Julie Fowlis

 
Wagner's The Ring Cycle

__________
*We have seen this happen far too many times, and really, this constitutes a throat-punching offense.

7 comments:

Warner said...

At my brother's memorial, which was also none religious, a number of friends and family spoke.

His friend Jacques D'Amboise chose to dance his remembrance.

What was good for her family and friends is all that matters.

mom in northern said...

All as it should be...
Love you

vince said...

It sounds like a beautiful service for a beautiful soul. ((hugs))

Carol Elaine said...

What Vince said.

*huge hugs*

Steve Buchheit said...

Sounds like it was exactly the right service. Funerals are for the living, a chance to let go and find some sense of closure. The service should remind the living of the dead, and it sounds like you did that very well.

Kimby Wilson said...

What Vince and Steve said.

Beautiful choices Janiece. Love to you both.

anissa_roy said...

Sounds like you made the perfect choice. And such lovely music.