A Week of Gratitude, Day Six - The Chance to do my Duty

Friday, December 7, 2012
My Hot Mom is getting older. I'm not telling tales out of school - I'm firmly in my middle age, so it only follows. As a result, she needs some additional help compared to the years when she was younger and bit more spry.

I realize that some adult children resent having to help their aging parents, or simply refuse to do so.* Apparently it interferes with their very important lives, or something. And I also realize that some aging parents don't like to ask their adult children for the help they need. But I've been giving this a lot of thought lately, and I've decided that I'm grateful for this opportunity.

Mom needing a bit more help to manage her activities, even on a temporary basis, gives us a chance to spend time together. It gives her a chance to know my husband as I know him, and recognize his generosity and devotion. It provides me with an opportunity to get to know her in new ways, and for her to know me as the competent, caring adult I've become. It allows her to learn how to ask for help, and to accept help gracefully. It allows me to learn to give help without conditions, and to do so gracefully. It opens the door to honest conversations about critical end of life decisions, and allows us to communicate in new ways. And it allows me the opportunity to do my duty, which I've come to understand matters to me in deep, meaningful ways. 

Today I'm grateful to have the chance to help my Mom live a meaningful, independent life in her senior years, for both our sakes.

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*Talk about some seriously shitty karma. Good luck with all that. 

2 comments:

Anne C. said...

And it's posts like this that show why I admire and love you, J.

mom in northern said...

And this mom says "Thanks". I am also learning to say "Help". A word not usually found in my vocabulary. My mom always said I was born "Bull headed". She may have been right. :-)