You People Need to Get a Hobby

Wednesday, October 14, 2009
I was perusing the referrals on my Sitemeter account the other day, and I have to say - you people really need to get a hobby. Aside from the normal pr0n and wackadoo searches, I've been getting some hits on these little gems:

Is Keith Harkin gay? Christ, who cares? He's evidently a pretty gifted musician, so unless you're twelve, I can't see how this can possibly be of interest to you.

Michele Bachmann nude photo. Gee, thanks a lot, Internet. Now I have to go scrub my eyeballs with lye.

Men shitting. Please. Seek help. And why would HCDSM appear in the search results for such a phrase? Ew.

Scars from toupee glue. Gadzukes! Using toupee glue can give you SCARS?
The Internet - diluting the gene pool for the good of mankind. While I usually welcome new readers here, I'm not sure I necessarily want folks who use these search phrases.

10 comments:

GoldenMesa said...

Does this mean folks with these search phrases are referred to your site? By what search engine? I'm not a regular here (sorry) but do you often wax poetic about the dangers of toupee glue? (I guess it will register as a topic more frequently NOW, especially as _I've_ just mentioned it here also). Perhaps a disregard for Boolean operators just combined "men" and "shit" (words that MAY have been used here before???), in which case for your site the recombination possibilities are pretty open and potentially amusing/alarming. How very MadLibs... :)

Janiece said...

Welcome, GoldenMesa.

It does mean that those search phrases ended up here for some strange Googley reason.

Google isn't the only search engine that leads those search results here, but it is the most common.

John the Scientist said...

Google is supposed to be more than a Boolean match engine, it's supposed to suss out whether those words are likely to be connected in some way.

Google has a long way to go. Or is it me, and their matching algorithm actually seems to be getting worse in the past year or so?

WendyB_09 said...

It's gotten worse.

Right before I lost my job I was doing deep research for a legal case and needed subject matter information. Pulled a Google search and got some really good results, but forgot to bookmark a couple of them. Ran the exact same search the next day and got crap. Never did find the cites I was trying to find again.

John the Scientist said...

Yeah, I have that problem, too Wendy. It's as if they change their best fit parameters every 12 hours.

MWT said...

I've noticed that it's gotten a lot harder to find past Blogger posts by keyword search. I'll type in a word or phrase that I'm positive appeared in the article I'm looking for, and it doesn't find it. Then it turns out that the actual published version was a singular instead of a plural or something. -.-

Janiece said...

MWT, me, too. I can't find anything around here anymore. I thought it was just because I changed the URL, but evidently (this one time), it's not my fault.

Cindi in CO said...

Um, sorry about the Keith Harkin thing...

You DID warn me, after all.

matt said...

Kinda makes you wonder . . . The frightful fact that humans presumably capable of producing, and raising (in some fashion), offspring find this material worthy of creating and posting truly makes me worried for the fate of mankind. It's enough to make a civil libertarian advocate involuntary neuterings!

As for google, after buying the google cell phone, and being forced to live the google life in a googly way, We are not amused . . .

Janiece said...

The royal "We," Matt?

Hehe.