The Shovel of Doom™

Friday, January 18, 2008
I received my first bit of trollage yesterday. It took 6 weeks to arrive, so I suppose I shouldn't complain, but it occurred to me that I may need to talk about it, and provide a link for future reference.

In general, I welcome comments from anyone on any topic. I don't care if you agree with me or not - in fact, having a stable of spider-eating man-bitches comment on all my posts is boring. I really enjoy a good debate on controversial topics, provided the participants don't act like a bunch of dumb-asses. And that pretty much sums up my "rule" for posting on my blog:

Don't Be a Dumb-Ass.

If you have an opinion to express, please do so in a courteous and respectful manner.

If your opinion involves an assertion of an other-than-supernatural nature, please ensure you either have the credibility to express your opinion (i.e., an MD discussing a medical procedure), or you provide a verifiable reference for the information you're asserting is the "truth."

If your opinion involves an assertion of a supernatural nature, please recognize that the gallery has no obligation to take your assertion as "true" just because you say it is.

When expressing your opinion, please do so in a logical manner and refrain from using the standard logical fallacies to prove your point. If you have any confusion as to what constitutes logical fallacies or bad argument, please see Michael Shermer's Why People Believe Weird Things, Chapter 3, "How Thinking Goes Wrong: Twenty Five Fallacies That Lead Us to Believe Weird Things," available through Google Book Search or Amazon.

I believe most of the regulars here at Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men already abide by these rules. I also believe anyone who engages in dumb-assery will be roundly spanked by the gallery without any prompting from me.

However, first time trolls will be gently spanked, and referred to this entry. If the trollage continues, the comment will be deleted, and the perpetrator will receive this sound effect:

*TONG*

This sound represents me smacking the perpetrator in the face with my Shovel of Doom™.

Spammers, of course, will be summarily deleted and smacked.

Don't make me take out the Shovel of Doom™.

23 comments:

Michelle K said...

I'm a big fan of disemvoweling for people who can't play nicely.

Janiece Murphy said...

Michelle, I love that concept, too. Teresa Nielson Hayden?

John the Scientist said...

"(i.e., an MD discussing a medical procedure)"

Hey, hey, us Ph.D.s can outsmart the MDs any day of the week and twice on Sundays... ;-)

Janiece Murphy said...

John, we've already established that you're the HCDSM resident expert on Physical Chemistry and related disciplines.

You've already got your "street cred."

John the Scientist said...

I'm just kidding. I taught too many whiny little sh... er ... pre-meds as a TA to resist taking a shot.

Janiece Murphy said...

John, I remember you talking about that. I believe the consensus was, "entitlement much?"

Tom said...

I now hereby resolve to be an interesting spider-eating man-bitch! Boring we can all do without.

But seriously, it's such a tragedy to see trolls. They are so wasting themselves, to no purpose. A real person just doesn't want them around, and won't dignify their foolishness with reason. It must be awful knowing that people who don't know you think you're worthless. Why do they do that to themselves.

Once again, Janiece, your attitude is excellent!

Janiece Murphy said...

::blush::

Tom, interesting Spider-Eating Man-Bitches are always welcome here at Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men.

Jeri said...

Ooh, ooh, can I be a man-eating spider-bitch instead?

Janiece Murphy said...

Jeri, you make me laugh.

You can be whatever you want as long as you keep the gallery entertained.

Michelle K said...

Yes. I used to read Making Light regularly until the comments got a little too overwhelming to keep up with.

But I love disemvowelling people. Almost wish there was more call for it in my website, just because it's FUN!

Ummm...

Right! No disemvowelling here! Carry on!

Janiece Murphy said...

Michelle with two "L's", I don't want to co-opt someone else's Idea. It just seems cheap, somehow. Hence The Shovel of Doom™ and associated sound effect.

Michelle K said...

I think she's quite happy for people to disemvowel trolls.

And it's far better than responding to them. (Last I heard, disemvowel was even on Wikipedia.[runs and checks] Yup. Still there.)

Janiece Murphy said...

Michelle, the fact that "disemvoweling" is in Wikipedia tickles me no end.

Hee!

Nathan said...

Where do buy one-o-them Shovels of Doom? I need to practice operating it while wearing Shawn Powers Tentacle Arms.

Janiece Murphy said...

Nathan, I want to see that on "You-Tube." You could post it righ alongside the "Oh Yeah" dance.

MWT said...

The downside is that disemvowelling requires the host to be able to edit comments. Blogspot doesn't allow that.

And I like *tong!* ;)

Janiece Murphy said...

MWT, me too.

And thanks to Shawn who pointed out to me the noise that shovels make when used to smack people in the face.

Nathan said...

I don't really have anything to add. It just seems that I've been chasing Janiece around the internet...I keep arriving at sites moments after she's left the room.

No video for you.

Janiece Murphy said...

Nathan, I think you're mean.

Shawn Powers said...

Ah, my claim to fame. "Shawn, the guy that put the *TONG* in Janiece's Shovel of Doom™"

And no, that's not something dirty, sheesh, what's with you people.

Kate said...

I'm relatively lucky that I haven't received any trolls...yet. Although, I still get badly spelled offers for Viagra.

I may be needing to borrow that shovel of yours to beat down those Russian mail-order brides offering to pump up my tiny sausage.

Wouldn't it be so much better if they'd at least check if I were a woman and offer me smaller hips?

Jeez.

Janiece Murphy said...

Kate, me too. Almost all my spam is tiny sausage related.

I think they'd do better with more targeted marketing.

And Shawn? You're also known for your Mad Tech Support Skillz.