You Have Crappy Manners

Thursday, February 5, 2009
I am so sick of people who have crappy manners.

SICK. AND TIRED.

It's really not that hard to have good manners in public. Simply hold the door for folks who want to enter a building behind you. Say "excuse me" when you bump into people. Say "please" when you ask for something, and "thank you" when someone provides you with a courtesy or a service.

NOT HARD.

But apparently it is hard, at least for some people. They're too busy, or too special, or just too ignorant to abide by the social contract.

Well, I'm taking another step in my insuppressible slide toward curmudgeonliness.

I've decided to tell people when they're acting like ill-mannered asshats.

I'm not going to shake my fist and yell "Get off my lawn!" I'm not going to break my own rules about courtesy when I inform people that they've broken the social contract.

But I'm not going to shake my head and move along anymore.

I started my new found crusade the other day at the library. Our library is quite small - a holdover from when Parker was a very small horse town, not the booming bedroom community it is today. As a result, there's not very much parking, especially during their busiest hours, typically from 3:00 p.m. to about 6:00 p.m.

I went to the library after work to return some audio books, and pick up some new selections that had arrived. When I pulled in, it was crowded as always, and I looked around for a place to park. As I drove past the last row of parking, I found a spot next to a white Toyota...that was taking up two spaces.

Now, the spaces in that parking lot are quite small, and sometimes it's hard to pull in and "stay between the lines." If the Toyota was just creeping over, I would not have thought much about it. But the tires of this vehicle were straddling the line. The driver clearly intended to take two spots - I can only assume because they were afraid someone might ding their door. I'm actually okay with that strategy - provided the person parks their vehicle way out in the boonies where there's no shortage of parking. But I guess white Toyota is not only too special to require a single parking spot, but is also too busy to walk 100 feet to the larger parking lot where things were not as tight.

So before I left, I put the following note under the windshield wiper:
You really don't need two parking spaces. Perhaps next time you'll be more considerate.
I suspect white Toyota will read the note, curse at me, and continue on their merry way without even considering their behavior might be less than optimal.

But from now on, when people have crappy manners, I'm going to say so. Silence is acceptance, and I'm not going to stay silent any longer.

And get off my lawn!

14 comments:

John the Scientist said...

I think you'll need to order these.

Cleaning the bumper sticker off of their car will make them think about you more than momentarily. :D

Janiece Murphy said...

Hm. I think that would put in the "Crappy Manners" camp.

Jim Wright said...

I just ordered a twenty pack.

You know, I try to be polite to people. I place great stock in courtesy.

- unless you're an asshole. At which point I revert immediately and with prejudice to Chief Warrant Officer mode. Nothing chaps my ass more than selfish, clueless morons - these people deserve to be flame-sprayed until they are crispy and well done.

I've twice now parked directly behind parking spot straddlers, wedging them in so they can't leave until I'm done with my business. I just won't put up with it.

Carol Elaine said...

I'm with Jim. If someone's an asshole, he/she doesn't deserve my courtesy. Hell, they're lucky I don't outright punch them. What can I say? I'm a pacifist with anger (and third person pronoun) issues.

Janiece, you are a much nicer person than I am. In the past I've left notes on the windshields of asshats who've parked so that I had to climb in my car via the passenger seat. The notes always start out civil, but end up with me calling the offender an idiot or asshole.

Wendy said...

When someone actually says "excuse me" when they pass in front of me or bump into me, I've taken to thanking them very loudly for remembering their manners. Usually so the rest of the asshats that didn't say something can hear.

Even better, sometimes it affects a whole group of people in a given radius. Yesterday the train to work broke down because of the cold (yeah, I hear ya laffin, this would never happen in NYC or Chicago or Denver or Alaska!!). After a few attempts to restart, they declared failure and dumped us back onto the platform and single-tracked a train for us down the other track.

Because our train had stalled, the one behind us was packed when it pulled in. I just happened to be the first woman to get on and realizing there were no seats to be had, headed for a corner. One gentleman spotted me and offered me his seat. I thanked him and said "your mother raised you right, there are some gentleman still left in the world!"

Which prompted EVERY other man in our half of the car to leap up and offer the ladies and several elderly men their seats...even if a compadre that didn't habla had to be poked in the ribs and told to offer their seat!

The ripple effect was hysterical to watch and the other ladies nodded or winked at me as they exited at their stops. Our mini-manners revolution!

And I love those bumper stickers, don't have a car, but they could come in handy.

WendyB_09

Nathan said...

I'm not about to spend any extra time educating assholes, but I always go out of my way to hold doors for people. My "your welcome" is always delivered very sincerely to those who can't be bothered to acknowledge the act. And sometimes, their "what for" look is priceless.

mattw said...

I used to imagine having a frozen water bottle that I would bonk people over the head with when they did stupid stuff like that.

Go Janiece!

Char said...

In SW Florida (you know, THE waiting room) almost everyone parks like an idiot. They also drive like idiots, its a prerequisite to live here. I would run out of paper and ink if I addressed their inconsiderate-ness!
Oh, and BTW...horns...they love blowing their horns. If you hesitate more than 1.2 seconds at a stop light...you'll hear about it! I'm just saying.

Janiece Murphy said...

Matt, that is a most excellent idea. Hmm...

Hi Char. I would not live in Florida. For any reason.

You've just given me more reasons not to.

MWT said...

Heh, brights etiquette.

I work on an island with a large gated community filled with old rich people. They have trouble remembering what to do with their brights when a car is approaching from the other direction - even if the other car is doing the flash signalling thing.

neurondoc said...

I want those.

I have handicapped tags for a reason. Yes, I would prefer not to need them, but that's life. I do not hesitate to confront dickwads who park in handicapped spots without a tag. A frequent response "But it was only for a minute." Along with (in icy weather) "But it is really icy/slippery/hard to walk..." Hello -- if it is hard for YOU to walk, imagine how hard I find it. Aaargh. My dander is rising even thinking about it.

I've even gotten an eye roll from some athletic guy in his mid-thirties. He did it again a week or two later (there was only one handicapped spot at the daycare center), so I completely blocked him in. When I came out about 10 minutes later, he was freaking out on his cell phone to the police. I sweetly asked "Oh, am I blocking you?" then I hopped in my car and drove off. He never did it again.

I won't talk about what I did to the person who blocked me from getting into my car TWICE by parking in the slanty line part of a handicapped spot...

neurondoc said...

The husband says that I can't buy any, because I am the type who would totally get caught putting it on the offending car...

Janiece Murphy said...

Natalie, taking two spots for your spiffy car makes you an inconsiderate dickwad.

Parking in a handicap space when you're able bodied makes you a dickwad who's ripe for a beat-down, at least as far as I'm concerned.

And I should not have those stickers for similar reasons...

neurondoc said...

Janiece -- I hear you. Let's just say that my pacifistic self did something to the blocking-the-handicapped-spot car that would get me in BT (big trouble)... My non-pacifist husband approved. And (shockingly) I did not get caught.