'Tard of the Week - "America Forever"

Wednesday, February 18, 2009
This week's 'tard is a group who identifies themselves as "America Forever."* These bastions of tolerance and love are responsible for the ad featured at right, which ran in the Salt Lake Tribune. Go ahead and read the tripe these folks are spouting, if you dare. I'll wait.

All done? Nauseous now? Yeah. Me, too.

Here are my favorite parts:
  • "This is not about hate or civil rights." Really? Are you sure about that? Because your rhetoric sounds awfully hateful to me. And please save me from your canard that gays and lesbians have the same rights you do because they're allowed to marry other gays and lesbians of the opposite gender. Disingenuous at best, that's really just spiteful. The real hypocrisy there is that in the next breath, they say that by allowing gay and lesbian couples to openly "display" their relationship, they're "forcing the acceptance of homosexuality as a relationship equal to a man and woman relationship." Yeah, you're right. No civil rights violation there.
  • "This is the reality of the gay movement." And then they go on to quote something called "The Homosexual Declaration of War" from 1987, where teh gayz evidently descended upon Washington to decry American values, family and straight people everywhere. Since the majority of gay activism today is geared towards allowing gay and lesbian people into the mainstream, I guess it's appropriate that that this wack-a-doo organization should be battling a gay and lesbian wack-a-doo organization.
  • "Shame on Utah gays for using the LDS Church." Because really, we all know that the LDS church is really secretly supporting the gay agenda. Because that's who they are.
  • "Gays should be forced to not display their sexual conduct." I guess it's okay to be gay as long as you stay firmly and irrevocably in the closet so as not to offend "America Forever's" tender sensibilities.
  • "Anti-Species behavior, as in homosexuality, promotes the use of these natural instincts against its own nature, and should not be endorsed by the law." Because teh gayz are just unnatural. Sort of like them black folk governing themselves is just unnatural. But we're not bigoted! Oh, no!
This particular piece of poo is so offensive, I'm not sure I can come up with an appropriate piece of vitriol to respond.

What I can say, however, is that this ad, all by itself, has encouraged me to support "The Common Ground Initiative," which is evidently a movement in Utah dedicated to fighting for the rights of gay and lesbians to health care, fair housing and employment, wrongful death legal rights, adult joint support, and Amendment 3 clarification. Before I saw this ad, I didn't even know what the Common Ground Initiative was, but the fact that "America Forever" thinks they're so poisonous means I'm probably on the same page. I doubt very much that was what "America Forever" had in mind, but them's the breaks when you're so busy frothing at the mouth you can't see two feet in front of you.

So you, "America Forever," are 'tards. Of the first order. Your ignorance of the culture you detest is only surpassed by your unreasoned bigotry and hatred. Fuck off, won't you?


*Why, yes, linking that website did make me throw up in my mouth a little. Thanks for asking.

19 comments:

Carol Elaine said...

Can we vote for 'Tard of the Year now?

Wendy said...

Ya know, my biggest thrill this past weekend was spotting a friend's commitment ceremony announcement in the Sunday paper (after being together seven years) and seeing ALL of his family in the photo... including his minister father who many years ago threatened to disown him for his lifestyle. I was so happy for them and YAY to dad for coming around!

See, I was there the night 13 years ago when he came out to our group. We were at an end of year dinner for our organization and dancing was had after dinner. At one point he commented that much as he liked me, he'd rather be dancing with one of the other guys, who I knew was gay. I asked him why he wasn't and he said what will the group say.

I stopped dancing, kissed him on the cheek, and told him our friends would say nothing, nor would they be surprised. We already knew and just had to wait until he was ready.

Where are you going, he asked.
I'm going to get a drink, and you're going to ask your guy to dance.

And to the delight of a roomfull of friends, he did just that!!

Now he's in a committed relationship (should be MARRIED, but not legal yet in Georgia) to a wonderful guy and he's HAPPY.

So I just don't get stoopidity like that Utah ad. Just WHO or WHAT is it hurting? PA-LEASE!

There goes my liberal upbringing agian.

WendyB_09

Janiece Murphy said...

No, Carol Elaine, we will follow the democratic process. Because we're just like that here at HCDSM.

Carol Elaine said...

Harumph!

*walking away, mumbling*
Stupid fairness. Stupid democracy. Stupid America Forever for making me feel all stabby and shit.

vince said...

I looked at the site, and they're still quoting from the satirical Michael Swift essay, leaving out the first line of the essay as so many other anti-gay organizations have.

And the LDS Church poured some $40 million into the Prop 8 fight in California. Yep, pro-gay, that's them.

The stupidity, it burns!

Janiece Murphy said...

Carol Elaine, I didn't say your couldn't stab them. I said we wouldn't be voting early.

::stab, stab::

Eric said...

Questions: what is "intimadation" and how will it "valdite their relationship of the same sex!!!"? Is "en excerpt" some sort of Latin phrase?

Should I be that worried about the "Homosexual's Movement Ulitmate Goal" if there's obviously only one gay person advancing it? (Is he very large and likely to beat me up or can I safely run past him while avoiding his gaze--oh no, he's not waiting for me in the parking lot, is he?!) Anyway, they keep referring to this one specific homosexual and his "homosexual's agenda" throughout the page, but they never tell us who it is (which I think would probably be helpful). I'll bet it's that short actor who joined Scientology, isn't it, and he'll sue if they say his name. I'll bet that's his agenda that they're totally scared of, too. But didn't he marry what's-her-name?

Is the "conjugal dimension" like space and time? Did you know that tobacco billboards were gay? (I didn't, though I guess I should have suspected there was something about the Marlboro Man.)

On the page about anti-species syndrome, I was very concerned to see that the gay person America Forever doesn't want to get sued by is using "artifacts" to "replace the presence of the opposite sex." Shouldn't these artifacts be in a museum? Probably. Clearly "America Forever" is justified in their concern that "Mr. X" has been taking the proceeds of grave-robbing and international smuggling out to movies, dinner, picnics, Scientology lectures, and other places he should be taking his wife. I don't see how any of you can take issue with this--don't you understand how tragic it would be if, say, a priceless Ming-dynasty vase was broken during (ironically enough!) a visit to a museum displaying Chinese antiquities? It would be awful, just awful!

I strongly believe that we should support America Forever's efforts by encouraging them to ally with Time Cube! Together, I believe they can stop the homosexual's nefarious scheme to possess all of the world's priceless antiquities by controlling the conjugal dimension using tobacco advertising (Time Cube will be especially helpful in dealing with the alternate-dimensions-aspect)!

Janiece Murphy said...

Eric, don't make me send Mr. X over to sodomize you with a Ming vase.

This is Serious. Serious.

Your levity makes light of this Very Important Issue...

Okay, I have to stop now. Who takes this shit seriously? Aside from the right-wing religious nutcakes, I mean?

Janiece Murphy said...

Here's an update from Andrew Sullivan:

http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2009/02/utah-update.html

Konstantin B. said...

Where do this people come from? Really.

I'll admin that I was not born here, but this is the "Land of the Free". Shouldn't freedom and equal rights get ingested from birth with the mother's milk?

I don't get it.

Jim Wright said...

Goddamnit, Janiece, you need to warn me in advance before you publish stuff like that.

I'm thinking instead of 'Tard of the Week, it should be more like: Caution, Jim, your head is about to explode.

Fuck, like Konstantain said, where do these people come from? Seriously?

It's not about Civil Rights. Yeah. Delude yourself much?

Janiece Murphy said...

Jim, I could always send Mr. X to your house with his Ming Vase to warn you ahead of time.

Would that work out for you?

Hehe.

Steve Buchheit said...

The good thing is all these idiot groups do the work for us to point out the people we should be supporting.

As I found out research the kevlar question, "teh stupid" is increasing.

Karl said...

yeesh...

I think this 'America Forever' fella got pantsed at the prom right in front of CindyLou (or BillyBob) Rottencrotch and she/he laughed - now he's out for Wevenge! working up wacky web sites from the basement of his mom's house. Dude, spell check...

What a knob...

But similar to what Steve said, sites like that generally point to those we should support, or at the very least defend from hateful, inane idiocy.

Where's my eyewash? I'm all ick now...

Janiece Murphy said...

Lye will be distributed as you exit the blog...

Tania said...

Hmm. I've been trying to come up with a good wedding present for my friends Lisa and Tiffany, they got married on the 7th. Lovely ceremony, nice party afterwards.

I think a contribution in their names would be appreciated.

neurondoc said...

Well, I'm with Carol. Although there's plenty of time for some other lovely example of humanity to do his/her/their best to surpass this. And, yes, I couldn't help myself and that website made me barf in my mouth. Why do I click on links that I know will do that? I think I will contribute to the Common Ground Initiative in honor of my brother and "brother-in-law". So there America Forever.

Natalie -- muttering very nasty things under my breath

Nick said...

Our America Forever, the organization that advocates equal rights for all Americans is here to oppose the other America Forever, to oppose the verbal diarrhea that is being spewed by one, poorly misguided family that has found another way to make a living off hate.

www.americaforever.org

Janiece Murphy said...

Welcome, Nick. Good luck in your endeavor - you have my support.