Something Icky This Way Comes

Thursday, August 26, 2010
So the doorbell rang yesterday afternoon, and it was my mail carrier with a package for me. A package from Brooklyn, NY. A package from Nathan and John the Scientist.

::cue ominous music::


A number of years ago, the Incomparable Anne™ and I sent John a bug-pop that we bought at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science. And by "bug-pop," I mean a lollipop with an actual bug in it. This, of course, necessitated a response.


 The green box appears to be some sort of chocolate coated cookies, although the photo looks like chocolate coated mushrooms. Or penises. Either way, I'm not eating them.


The bubble envelope contained a ziploc baggy.


A ziploc baggy with a cold-pack and a butcher's tray.


A butcher's tray containing duck tongues. Because really - nothing says "I am your true friend" like a package full of duck tongues shipped from Flushing, New York.

Needless to say, the duck tongues are now double wrapped and sitting in the trash can at the curb awaiting the fine folks from Waste Management to come and take them away. Nicely played, guys. Nicely played. 

You know what this means.

20 comments:

Eric said...

How does one prepare ducks' tongues? Soup? Fried?

Unknown said...

The little mushroom cookie things are actually very innocuous and tasty if they're the ones I'm thinking of (made by Meiji Japan). Just about anything Meiji makes is tasty. It's basically a little cracker stem with a wad of pretty good for the price chocolate on it.

Anne C. said...

It is made by Meiji, Rachael. Thanks for the endorsement.

And I got something too, had about the same reaction ("dun dun duuuuun!"). I've posted a short post, no picture yet, since I'm at work and on a deadline, but I'll add a link or two to elucidate.

I'll be Smithers to your Burns, milady.

deadsur = what we'll send JTS and Nathan next

WendyB_09 said...

Duck tongue. Supposedly a delicacy in Oriental cooking. Last time I checked you were NOT in the Orient.

I'm thinking Mr. Burns is plotting revenge about now...exxxxcelent.

John the Scientist said...

An answer to Eric's question.

Revenge is a dish best served cold. On ice, in fact. :D

John the Scientist said...

And Rachel is correct - those are the Meiji muchroom shaped chocolate crackers.

Janiece said...

John, I don't believe you. They may have started as chocolate covered crackers, but I'm sure you and Nathan replaced them with chocolate covered animal penises.

Because we all know that's just the way you roll.

John the Scientist said...

No, actually, they are thje second peace offering to the Smart Man. I konw I already sent one, but still...

Fresh duck tongues. :D

kirwoodd said...

well I feel like the proper response would have been to get on the google, find a recipe, prepare said duck tongues and then either:
1) ship the prepared dish back
or
2) eat said dish and report back about how wonderful it was.

Nothing says "fuck you" like turning a nuisance into a tasty treat. :)

pricas: a group of people being annoying "You pricas are REALLY pissing me off!"

CkretsGalore said...

Here's a nummy recipe for duck tongue: http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2009/10/nasty-bits-fried-duck-tongue-offal-recipe.html

I wouldn't try it mind you. Nor puffed ducks feet/chicken feet etc.

That's pretty damn funny though! Nicely played indeed!

Janiece said...

Paul, even if I was so inclined (and I'm not - I had enough exotic food when I was in the Navy to last me a while), I would be loathe to eat meat that had been shipped across the country via the U.S. mail.

I guess Smithers and I will have to find some other response...

Bwahaha!

John the Scientist said...

And, like a good chess player, I've already got my next two responses thought out...

Bwahahahahaha!

Eric said...

See my comment at Anne's blog: duck-flavored deep-fried crunchy bits? I want.

Though Janiece brings up a good point about meat shipped across the country. How were the tongues packed? Omaha Steaks ship safely, but they're all vacuum-packed and so on.

Janiece said...

Eric, it was packed just as you saw - sealed in a ziploc bag with a Coleman cooler pack.

Yeah. Not going to happen.

Eric said...

Then, yeah, I'd be concerned about salmonella. Jeez, John.

mom in northern said...

SO..the one upmenship begins.

Please keep your many fans advised.

Nathan said...

I'll have you know that we had to pack and then re-pack those delicacies. The Officious Prick™ at the Post Office counter wouldn't accept the package at first because the contents were "too loosely packed" and the FAA(?) has regulations against transporting packages that rattle. Really?


I wouldn't have so much trouble with the idea of the tongues having traveled for a day. The fact that they had spent a year or so in a duck's mouth would be what kept me from eating them. But that's just me.

Eric said...

But you have no problem eating something that came out of a bird's ass? Just asking. :P

The Mechanicky Gal said...

Well Janiece, you know me and my penchant for eating That-Which-Cannot-Be-Named-Yet-is-Oh!-SO-Tasty! so the duck tongues are right up my alley! I wonder where I could find them here, in SD. Already prepared, of course. While I did well with the Chili Rellenos, that was my cooking for the year. And I don't think I could get Mechanicky Guy to cook duck tongues.

John the Scientist said...

MG, we live to serve. This Dim SUm place has BBQ Duck Tongue on the menu.