Attention Women!

Friday, September 5, 2008
If your girls are so large and ponderous that, when unsupported, they literally hang below your waist and give the impression that you are pregnant - perhaps you should rethink that whole "unsupported in public" fashion decision.

Please. My eyes can only take so much lye before they will shrivel up and become dessicated raisins in my sockets.

And the fact that your male companion and daughter also sported this fashion-don't...with similar results...means I have this family image burned into my retina for the duration.

Oh, Honey. No. Just No.

23 comments:

Jeri said...

You know, Tania mentioned a saline accident over on Shawn's blog that might help - she used mentholated nasal saline as an eye flush and really cleaned out her eyes.

Sounds like drastic remedies are called for here.

You have to wonder - what were they thinking?

Lance Weber said...

Pics or it didn't happen.

Random Michelle K said...

Lance, I live in WV. I see stuff like that all the time.

I actually had a brain filter installed recently, so I might see, but not comprehend.

Tania said...

You know, I worry about things like that happening to me. Being 60 and having to use a come-along with a fabric sling to winch up the girls so I can get them into a foundation garment. Does the corset purchase make more sense, now that you know more of the context?

I am so sorry that you had to see that. Let Kitten War help dull the memories...

Random Michelle K said...

tania,

I know this has come up before with both you and Kim, but I know someone who had reduction surgery and she said it was the best thing she ever did.

I think it's also covered by many insurance companies.

Tania said...

Michelle, I know people who've had reduction surgery and they love it. Totally are thrilled with it.

I'm ok with being a 38DD, I have the build to support them. I wish they were perky, but that's A LOT OF MASS and perkiness just isn't really feasible, physics wise. At least they don't have that bolt on look. Hee!

The come-along comment is my usual come back to my friends that wish they were more chesty.

I don't have back pain or shoulder dents. And I can make them jump around when I flex pecs.

I have thought about mastopexy for vanity and all that. But I have lots of other things I'd like to spend my money on first. Lot's of other things

Janiece Murphy said...

I have nothing against a large bosom, in spite of my lack thereof.

I do have something against seeing a freakishly large bosom unsupported behind a thin, thin T-Shirt.

Seriously - they might as well have been naked.

As Tania says, it's a physics thing. And I know they make undergarments to assist with these issues.

Where's the bra whisperer when you need her?

And as a point of order, Tania does indeed have the frame to support her girls. She's a Hawtie.

Random Michelle K said...

I didn't mean to say there was something wrong with 'em, only that they can cause discomfort and health issues.

Sorry!

Tania said...

Nothing to apologize for! :)

Janiece Murphy said...

No, No!

Just clarifying my own position. We have several fine ladies who can claim a large bosom around these parts, and I want to make sure they know I think they're hot.

HAWT.

Tania said...

We're all smoking HAWT!! Rowwrr!!

I'm just saying no offense taken about my less than perky generous bosomliness and such. If these suckers were causing other problems, I'd address the problem. Because I'm that kind of person.

kimby said...

I am so glad that I did not read this until this morning....i DID NOT need the visual image of the "Droopy Family" in my brain before sleeping....ewwwwww.

Janiece Murphy said...

Kimby, you really need to toughen up (or install aforementioned brain filter) if you're going to hang around here.

Just sayin'.

vince said...

Brain filters - now on sale at Taget, Kmart, Wal-mart, and other fine establishments. Because you know you need one.

Carol Elaine said...

Vince, does Costco have brain filters? Because I don't shop at any of those fine establishments, but I do like me some Costco.

As a proud owner of a big chest, I can attest to the need of supportive foundation garments to keep the girls looking as perky as possible. And they even have pretty, frilly, sexy, super low-cut bras that do the job very well that are reasonably affordable (psst - Lane Bryant, good even if you're not big elsewhere), so there's really no excuse.

Janiece Murphy said...

Carol, I'm the proud owner of a small chest, and I can still attest to the importance of "supportive foundation garments."

Repeat after me, ladies: Good bras are our friends.

vince said...

I have a feeling that us gentlemen have a whole different idea than you ladies about what makes a good bra.

Especially us gentlemen who are single.

::runs and hides::

John the Scientist said...

Quick-release fasteners. Right?

Janiece Murphy said...

Don't make me break out the Shovel of Doom™, you knuckle-draggers.

Lance Weber said...

I think I deserve a cookie for the remarkable restrain I've displayed thus far.

Or maybe I was so inspired by Palin's small town values that I am now pure of spirit, thought and deed!

Janiece Murphy said...

Lance, does that mean she and McSame can count on your vote in November?

C'mon...you know you want to.

Lance Weber said...

It's just that I'm so confused! First the reverend said we shouldn't vote for McCain and now he says we should.

I must say, all this salacious talk about bras is taking a toll on my pledge of abstinence. I can't imagine how difficult it must be for those husbands who have to decide if their women-folk should be allowed to have breast reduction surgery.

Damn, so much for the cookie

Tania said...

Janiece, one of Lance's daughter's said "Doesn't John McCain's wife make you think she's the White Witch from Narnia?"

I don't think she'll let him vote for that side of the ticket. Always winter and never Christmas doesn't go over well with the younger set.