Celebrity Boyfriend

Monday, October 20, 2008
Recently I kicked Bill Maher off my celebrity boyfriend list for lowering himself to the level of the Creationists. That got me to thinking - who are my current celebrity boyfriends?

Let's see:

- Neil deGrasse Tyson, because he satisfies my Nerd Love.
- Colin Powell, because he's just a class act.
- Jon Stewart, because he makes me laugh and he's an equal opportunity kind of guy.
- Laurence Fishburne, because he's just too cool for school.
- Phil Plait, because he posed nude. With a telescope. And, oh yeah, he's a fabulous skeptic.

I'm not sure that Phil qualifies, since I've actually met him, and thus putting him on my celebrity boyfriend list might make me a stalker. Which I'm not. (Hi, Phil! Wink, wink!)

Because that's the beauty of a celebrity boyfriend. You can put someone on your list without being a creepy, creepy stalker, since you'll (probably) never meet them, and thus there's no possibility of a romantic entanglement. Sort of like fantasizing about what you'd do with your sixty million dollar PowerBall win, when you never buy a lottery ticket.

Who are your celebrity boyfriends?

17 comments:

Ilya said...

The only list of the kind the I ever cosidered was the Friends "movie stars you're allowed to sleep with".

Janiece Murphy said...

Ilya, I think the spirit is the same.

Nathan said...

Scarlett Johanssen
Angie Harmon (love that voice)
Sandra Bullock
Sarah Palin (Oops, I meant Tina Fey)

Jeri said...

While Colin Powell *rocks* he's a hero, not a celebrity boyfriend. A minor distinction for me. ;)

Here's my list:

Neil Gaiman - British author
Richard Branson - British tycoon & adventurer
Howie Long - American athlete and sportscaster
Vladimir Kitschko - Ukrainian boxer, PhD and chess champion
Clive Owen - British actor

I vacillated on Branson - he's a bit homely - but he's such a fascinating man I think I'd notice that for all of about sixty seconds. (So, I'm shallow.)

Janiece Murphy said...

But Jeri, who wouldn't want a hero as a boyfriend?

Jeri said...

I wouldn't want someone I have too much hero-worship for. I think my rule of thumb is that I'd feel comfortable turning around and saying, "Hey, you're being an asshole, knock if off." Or, "If you're going to eat crackers, get your ass out of my bed."

I'm not sure I could say that to Powell. ;)

Janiece Murphy said...

Well, thankfully Mrs. Powell does not seem to have that problem.

Tania said...

Janiece and I share Jon Stewart and Fish.
Jeri - Richard Branson is inspired!

Mine, in no particular order

Billy Zane - actor, tasty piece of eye candy
Conan O'Brien - because he makes me laugh
Alton Brown - food, motorcycles, science. What's not to love?
Neal Stephenson - geekery and odd hobbies. Fascinating man.

Nathan said...

Jeez,

And I just went for babes. I'm shallow that way.

Carol Elaine said...

Janiece and Tania, Jon Stewart has been my celebrity boyfriend for about four years. Seriously. I even put together a silly April Fool's Day 2005 website devoted to my adoration of The Funny One. Unfortunately I can't find it, but it was very silly.

I don't have any other celebrity boyfriends, but I do have a celebrity male seraglio with many, many members, including Stephen Colbert, Keith Olbermann, Bill Maher (sorry, still like the guy), Patrick Stewart, Jeff Goldblum, Alton Brown, Mike Farrell (even though I kind of know him now and have met his wife and son - he's even cooler than when he was a far off crush) etc., etc., etc.

(Seriously, if I wrote out everyone in my celebrity male seraglio, I'd be here all bloody day. 'Cause I've been compiling the list for over 20 years and once a guy gets on the list, it's difficult for him to drop off. Even the ones who have died, i.e. Jeremy Brett [sigh].)

Were I to momentarily swing the other way, I have a short list of celebrity ladies I'd consider: Queen Latifah, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Gillian Anderson and now Tina Fey.

Janiece Murphy said...

Carol Elaine, you used seraglio in a sentence, and it made sense!

You're my new same-sex girlfriend!

But I may kick you out of bed for Queen Latifah or Selma Hayik...

Carol Elaine said...

Wha-? I said something that made sense? How'd that happen? Gotta keep an eye on that...

*blushs* Gosh! Same here, babe. I mean, aside from the facts that you're smart and hawt, your apple butter is enough make any straight gal reconsider her sexual orientation.

Sure, Selma Hayek is smoking. And she's done some stuff I deeply respect (DOGMA, FRIEDA), but until now I'd never really considered her to be on my list. Now I'm rethinking that position. Janiece, we can always take turns, ya know. Isn't that what same-sex girlfriends do for each other?

Tania said...

Gina Gershon and Isabella Rosselini (sp). They could eat crackers in my bed any day/night/afternoon whenever.

Random Michelle K said...

Selma Hayek is gorgeous. Totally yummy.

I wish I had her hair. (wistful sigh)

Steve Buchheit said...

You know, like Nathan I'd go for the chicks.

network said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Janiece Murphy said...

*TONG*